Category Archives: Entertainment

V for Reznor

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NINE INCH NAILS LYRICS

The Hand That Feeds


You’re keeping in step
In the line
Got your chin held high and you feel just fine
Because you do
What you’re told
But inside your heart it is black and it’s hollow and it’s cold

Just how deep do you believe?
Will you bite the hand that feeds?
Will you chew until it bleeds?
Can you get up off your knees?
Are you brave enough to see?
Do you want to change it?

What if this whole crusade’s
A charade
And behind it all there’s a price to be paid
For the blood
On which we dine
Justified in the name of the holy and the divine

Just how deep do you believe?
Will you bite the hand that feeds?
Will you chew until it bleeds?
Can you get up off your knees?
Are you brave enough to see?
Do you want to change it?

So naive
I keep holding on to what I want to believe
I can see
But I keep holding on and on and on and on

Will you bite the hand that feeds you?
Will you stay down on your knees?

life lessons from 80’s cartoons

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Smurfistan, comrade!

Ch’yeah, like your parents were any better-informed.

Think about it.

Here’s a list (from the zombie-like reanimated Cracked magazine) of life lessons from old 80’s cartoons. And here’s a wee sample, which I choose for no particular reason.

CARTOON: The Smurfs
LESSON: Communism works!

For naysayers who point to the Former Soviet Union as proof that communism is inherently flawed, may we merely direct your attention to Smurf Village, where everyone shares everything, wears similar utilitarian clothing, battles Gargamel and his turn-Smurfs-to-gold get rich quick schemes and obeys the dictates of a bearded, red hat-wearing, benevolent authority figure. Quoth Comrade Papa: “From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs.” Really, he actually said that.
How it affected us as adults: Secret communist agendas ceased being dangerous, or really any adjective of consequence, years ago. The worst thing communism does these days is make Ivy League students waste a couple of years wearing ugly clothes and attending boring meetings. However, the sexual politics of Smurf Village, with its one female for every 30 guys, did go a long way towards preparing us for freshman year of college.

But wait, there’s more!

Rick and roll!

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Mercer's not too sure about you, pal.

Mercer‘s back, and raincoaster’s got him (ah, if only)! Actually, he’s been back for ten days but before that he hadn’t updated since April, so serves him right for the fact I didn’t find out till today!

Still, we’re not proud and we will take what we can get.

I see that Jack Layton has distinguished himself on the international front by coming up with a solution for the Afghanistan situation. Jack is calling for peace talks with the Taliban. About time the NDP get back to their more loony roots. For a while there they were coming off all semi-sensible.

Rest assured if there are peace talks with the Taliban and Jack Layton The Mercer Report will be there! I’ve attended a lot of political events over the years and as a location I would suggest holding the talks in one of the ball rooms at the casino in Hull.

I think you might be able to smoke there and I’m guessing the Taliban would appreciate that. All the Taliban really require to have a good time is an ashtray and a few de-peopled women making sure there’s a steady supply of unsafe drinking water.

Agenda for Historic Peace talks between Jack Mercer is shocked, shocked I tell you!Layton and Taliban leader – room 202 Casino Du Lac Leamy, Quebec

8:00 am – Jack Layton opening comments and welcome to assembled media and Taliban representative.

8:05 am – Taliban representative walks to podium, poses for photographs with Mr. Layton.

8:06 am – Taliban representative cleaves Mr. Layton in the forehead with giant axe.

8:08 am – Peace talks end.

8:10 am – Olivia Chow says she is “encouraged by talks” – announces plan to run for leadership of NDP.

What else is going on? On the Liberal front I was encouraged to read that Michael Ignatieff will not accept any questions from the media that are “anticipatory hypotheticals”. I’m glad he made this clear because I hope to interview him on the show this year and I appreciate the heads up. Truth is I like Iggy but honestly sometimes I don’t know what in the hell he’s talking about. I thought all hypotheticals were anticipatory! I am so stupid sometimes. I googled the phrase “anticipatory hypothetical” and there are only seven known uses in the history of the English language. The term pops up on a website called indiansex.com and it’s also used in an essay written by some dude in Iowa who believes that robots have taken over the world.

And finally on a sad note that crocodile hunter guy was killed by a stingray. Laugh and the world laughs with you, get killed by a benign piece of seafood and the world laughs too apparently. Showbiz is brutal that way.

Welcome back.

Anticipatory bestseller?

a transatlantic political primer from the daily show

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Here’s a little roundup just to demonstrate that I can tell the countries apart. Everything I know about politics I learned from satirical and handsome television personalities. Hey, there are worse resumes, I’m telling you. I would post a clip of Boris talking about Canada, but all I could find was the Saskatoonberry essay, and let us just say the visuals are not exactly compelling.

First, here’s Jon Stewart on the Canadian terrorist plot:

And here he is again, from last year, on the microscopic differences between the US and the UK leadership:

And here’s a special bonus segment of Rick Mercer’s Talking to Americans. In this episode, he makes asses of people at NYU, Stanford, and the Gore and Bush campaigns:

 

The Mainstream Media on the Mainstream Media on the Blogosphere

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It’s complicated. Watch the Daily Show, with Jon “World’s Greatest Dad” Stewart and learn what the MSM thinks of what the MSM thinks of the Blogosphere.