conspiracy 911: the real reason it happened

Another video from apeman, the twisted Canuckistani genius who brought Hinterland’s Who’s Who’s Crack Spider into being.

Again, I’m sticking the video and lyrics over the jump because I was told that it was kinder to the people on dialup and also because I hope this way I won’t have to do a bloody restart every time my cache fills up.

add to del.icio.us :: Add to Blinkslist :: add to furl :: Digg it :: add to ma.gnolia :: Stumble It! :: add to simpy :: seed the vine :: :: :: TailRank

Continue reading

death poetry jam: fired from Apple for laying it down hardcore on the Canadian FedEx lady

Actually, all the FedEx ladies I know but one are gay. But Canadian FedEx ladies, gay, straight, or undecided Guatemalan poncho-clad and living off the Drive, are cool; this is not in dispute.

I knew one woman who worked with FedEx not because they had a great partner benefits program, which I believe they did, nor because the pay was good, which I believe it was, nor because the hours were flexible and suited her, which I believe they did, but rather because, on every cargo flight, there is an extra jumpseat in the cockpit which is available to FedEx employees who may wish to fly to, say, Bali, say, every Friday afternoon and return, oh, say every Monday morning, having surfed and parties the entire time, speaking hypothetically, of course.

Which reminds me to get my damn application in to FedEx. They need bloggers, right? Oh, totally.

In any case, here is the sad, yet amusing and Schadenfreude-laden tale of the star of Apple‘s local talent show, who allegedly-and-apparently got his butt fired for the following, talent-show-rocking, American Idol-worthy performance of, his ode to the Canadian FedEx lady.

Rhyme different?

And yes, they do indeed all have huge, anime eyes, the colour of Hudson’s Bay, Algonquin Park in October, Alberta sweetgrass, or the ice at the hidden heart of a Baffin Island glacier. Video over the jump.

add to del.icio.us :: Add to Blinkslist :: add to furl :: Digg it :: add to ma.gnolia :: Stumble It! :: add to simpy :: seed the vine :: :: :: TailRank

Continue reading