Best Facebook Thread Ever in history
Thanks, Archie, for the image!
and for those of you who prefer text: (I have the feeling this will go around the internet a couple of times)
Best. Facebook. Thread. Ever.
Category Archives: raincoaster
Operation Global Media Domination: the Divine Situation
As I’ve mentioned elsewhere online, there is the very slight chance that this could go to my head:
raincoaster is a god. Hire her. Immediately.
In related news, I think I’ve sent out about 700 emails today from three different email addresses, plus Facebook invitations for another 500 or so, for two different events. Oh wait: THREE different events.
Event #1 is the Social Media Club of Vancouver’s Meet the Geek dinner this coming Tuesday which, if you’re in Vancouver, you really shouldn’t miss. It’s a custom menu in a private dining room underneath Blood Alley, to raise money to help finish the Downtown Eastside social media documentary With Glowing Hearts. The film-makers and some of the stars will be in attendance, as will some of Vancouver’s finest geeks, who will be happy to demystify the world of tech over a plate of good nosh. If you ask nicely, they might even give you a peek at their iPads.
Event #2 is The Shebeen Club’s Going Pro: Getting Real in the Writing World with Sylvia Taylor on Monday, the 27th (a week later than usual). This month, we’ll have a restaurant all to ourselves as we move to the Everything Cafe on Pender Street. Sylvia will talk about the issue of professionalism and approaching your literary career as a business, which is particularly necessary in an economic climate like ours.
Event #3 is raincoaster media’s full day Social Media for NonProfits workshop that I’m teaching with Wes Regan of Building Opportunities With Business. This is the one that helps me keep a roof over my head. Which one did I do last? That’s right.
In also-related news, today I was interviewed by Gillian Shaw of the Vancouver Sun about the Meet the Geek dinner and her post should be up tomorrow online and hopefully in the paper this Saturday, and tomorrow it’s going to be on Breakfast Television as well. So, now I just have two more blog posts to do and then I can go to bed.
Oh, one more thing: Eight people on four continents all send me this with “Saw it and thought of you” comments. Let no-one say I don’t have a strong brand identity.
After seeing the success of the Old Spice commercials the mighty and terrible Cthulhu decided to sell his own scented products. Great Old Spice body wash; stop thinking in only four dimensions.
Quiz: What part of Thanksgiving are you?
We’re not being premature here: we’re being Canadian. Very few people outside of my mighty nation-state know Canadia has their Thanksgiving in October, before the Great Ice Spirit moves in and crushes us all to the ground, all but the mighty Ice Truckers. But it’s true.
You Are The Cranberry Sauce |
|
Though, you do tend to squish in people’s mouths… |
As to that last bit, well, you’ll have to ask my last boyfriend…if you can dig him up (uh, I mean find him).
Operation Global Media Domination: Soundtrack for Losers
that door had to be carted away and burnt later, for public safety reasons
Remember that old-timey singer Amy Winehouse, back when she was still alive?
Studio performance of Love is a Losing Game by Amy Winehouse
For you I was a flame
Love is a losing game
Five story fire as you came
Love is a losing game
While I wish I’d never played
Oh what a mess we made
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game
Played out by the band
Love is a losing hand
More than I could stand
Love is a losing hand
Self professed… profound
Till the chips were down
…know you’re a gambling man
Love is a losing hand
Though I’d bet on blind
Love is a faith resign
Memories mar my mind
Love is a faith resign
Over futile odds
And laughed at by the gods
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game
You know what else is a losing game? Trying to clean up the code in a popular page you copied bodily from Facebook because you are dutiful and political and committed to freedom of speech and think the world NEEDS an archive of the now-deleted Everybody Draw Mohammad Day page, and furthermore, you are doing it on a beautiful Friday Saturday (I have lost track of time GOD HAVE I BEEN HERE THAT LONG???) night while reading the posts and tweets of all my friends who are a block or two away, having a great time NOT editing Facebook code. And further to furthermore, not doing the workout I was supposed to get done four hours ago either, because I am here, madly editing this stupid, extraneous-div-filled code to appease the Google Gods, who have thrown this blog into the Ninth Circle of Google Hell since the start of May. I even pulled my best string, who yanked Matt Cutt‘s personal chain and got nothing better than When I search for ‘raincoaster’ that blog is the first hit, which proves it’s being indexed properly which is bullshit.
Don’t believe me? Here is my stats graph:
Is it any wonder I'm so fucking CRANKY?????
Now, having gone through ismyblogworking.com and Quantcast and the W3 Validator, Feed Validator, Google Webmaster Tools and (the much more decipherable) Yahoo Site Explorer, I have found my blog is riddled with a metric snotload of code errors and, since I, myself, don’t write in code unless someone is holding a gun to my head AND there are sharks with frikkin laser beams on their heads circling my desk, I didn’t put there. Right?
Anyhoodle, it appeared to even my inexperienced eye that code that looked like div /div div /div /form div div div div /h5 and so on was somewhat problematic, and so I sat down to eliminate said code, line by painful line. For two point seven five hours I sifted code, exercising my Delete button and my Backspace ruthlessly (have you seen Ruth lately, by the way? I’ve been Ruthless for months now) and when I looked at the sidebar I saw that I had successfully cleansed less than one-tenth of the code.
At that point I ruthlessly (seriously, where IS that bitch?) exercised the Move To Trash key, and I hope Lindsay Lohan is happy with the present I sent her.
Now I’m off to sacrifice a unicorn to the Google Gods.
Who knew Lady Gaga = Voldemort?
Wish me luck. On the plus side, I think this may be a good omen:
ever have that feeling…?
That feeling like you identify completely with a misunderstood character of widely popular fiction?
existential hulk is existential
Me too.
raincoaster 