Twinkle, Twinkle, little bioengineered superweapon

Porcupine, Bitch!According to this report from ABC News and the BBC, the United Kingdom has perfected a radically new and different weapons system.

While both Canada and the US sat by, lulled into complacency by the sheer numbers of their old-skool artillery, the Brits have been bio-engeneering a groundbreaking (literally) new weapon, cleverly tucked away on an ostrich farm where nobody would think to look for it.

The Poisonous Porcupine.

People in north-west England are being warned not to approach a porcupine which burrowed out of a farm visitors centre and is now on the loose, BBC Online reports.

Twinkle, a 0.9 metre long female, escaped from her enclosure at Eden Ostrich World near Penrith on Saturday, prompting warnings because her detachable, poison-filled quills can become embedded in skin.

Jim Peet, from the centre, was quoted as saying that Twinkle was normally "cool" but was classed as a dangerous wild animal because of her spiky appearance.

"She could make a real mess of someone's garden and she should not be approached as her quills contain poison and she could become flustered if backed into a corner," he added.

Twinkle's disappearance came after some British newspapers said police had received reports of a tiger on the loose in Yorkshire, northern England.

Any bets on what kind of poison they're using? Ricin? Strychnine? Insulin megadose? I pick my fallback fave, sodium fluroacetate.

Just look in them beady little eyes; they may be the last thing you ever see, bitch.

Porkypine

peregrine falcon cam

Peregrine FalconLet the Americans have their "Live from New York, it's one has-been host and a bunch of regulars you never heard of."

We've got our "Live from the rooftop of the Radisson Hotel in beautiful downtown Winnipeg, it's a pair of nesting Peregrine Falcons" cam.

And raincoaster must remark on how other countries may have rooftop gardens, rooftop dancefloors, rooftop lidos (whatever the hell they are) but leave it to Canada to not only reserve the rooftop for a pair of unhousebroken predators, but to also name the whole damn hotel chain after a stinky old canoeist.

Streaming Eagle Cam roundup here.

Peregrine Portrait

Full Metal Alchemist

by Tom Lehrer

a terrifying message from Al Gore! and Matt Groening!

Added on June 23, 2006, 08:57 AM
by ParamountClassics 

Provided By:

ParamountClassics

Director:

Peter Avanzino

Producers:

Claudia Katz, Geraldine Symon

Producers:

David X. Cohen, Matt Groening, Richard Sakai

http://www.climatecrisis.net

A Terrifying Message from Al Gore (01:23)
–> From the creators of Futurama comes a terrifying message from Al Gore. An Inconvenient Truth is now playing in theaters.

 

 

WWFSMWear?

Perhaps He would wear this spiffy Flying Spaghetti Monster Crocheted Hat. Self-referential, sure, but great for keeping the ol’ strands cosy and dry.

FSM chapeau

The Flying Spaghetti Monster Hat

The Pope has a special hat. Rabbis have special hats. Rastafarians have special hats. Why not Pastafarians?

This hat is crocheted (I assume you could knit something similar). Unfortunately, I don’t how to write patterns — my grandma taught me how to crochet in a rather freeform manner (she also made the best spaghetti and meatballs, EVER – coincidence?). So here’s a very rough guide…

Fsm hat front view

Now put on your hat and waggle your noodly appendages in His name — you’re warm, blessed, and look like a complete dork. AMEN.

Modeling hat

I’m sure she meant to say RAmen.

Meanwhile, I think we can see in this video an unheralded, early sighting of FSM Himself. His vengence is terrible: I miss the Swedish Chef so much…