Cookie! Cooooooooookie!

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Raincoaster Cookie! 

I always liked Cookie Monster; in addition to being a friendly, helpful, Up With Monsters kinda guy, he was really kinda stupid and fun to laugh at, and I treasure people like that. Additionally, although he only really came to life when some guy put his fist inside him, well the same can be said of many of my best friends, so um, so let's just move on to the next point, shall we?

Here's a fun link I stole from BoingBoing that, much as Gizoogle takes any web page and translates it into something that Snoop Dogg would say, takes any text you input and turns it into cookies. Make your own fun kitchen wallpaper with this: Debbie Travis, eat your heart out!

Note slight idiosyncracy: No "W." This is obviously a Dutch conspiracy!

Dutch Much?

Free Katie!

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Free Katie!Another from the brazilliant Defamer.

Snot or not?

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Courtesy of Defamer. Yes, the pic is a link.

Snot or Not?

Operation Global Media Domination: “I May Have to Start Reading the Independent Instead” Edition

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TIAOne is slightly fucking annoyed, one is. It's one thing to be ripped off and quoted inflammatorily out of context by the Mirror, but it's quite another to have a blog comment I left on the Guardian used as a springboard to a blog post made for pay and without attribution, most particularly when said blog post is already several days out of date.

That's the thing that bugs me about the Guardian blogs; they're not blogs, they're dumping grounds for stuff several days old, not worth putting on paper, or otherwise afterthought. It's all filler, just something to click on while you're waiting for that damn marketing report to load in the background.

That's not what a blog is meant to be. Ruskin woulda been a great blogger. "Have nothing in your blog that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful," makes perfect sense, doesn't it? I happen to think Giant Squid are beautiful. Not everyone agrees with me, but this ain't a forum. It's a blog.

It has a perspective, it has a voice, and most of all it has a certain currency.

This does not. By the time it was posted, one of the eggs mentioned had been missing for several days. The other is no longer expected to hatch. And yet the post happily burbles on about anticipation and the pair of eggs and how really fantastic it's going to be in a few days when they hatch, lalalalalalalalalalalalala. How did they get this story in the first place?

Funny you should ask.

Let's be fair; it could have happened one of two ways. Either:

A) the writers of the news blog do not actually read the news blog, and came to the story via old-fashioned wire services in which case the editor needs a good spanking

or

B) they got it from my posts in this thread and this thread, much earlier in the news blog and just googled for some background. In which case the editor needs a good flaming.

I don't demand cash. I don't expect flowers. But not so much as a LINK????

and for some reason I am unable to get to the sign in page today. Could there be more conclusive proof that there is no liberal media conspiracy?

Porn Stars Discover God, Shakespeare

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Yep, as Sploid reports, Jesus does indeed love porn stars. Jesus sure does love him some porn stars, yesiree!And now, they can love him right back. And no, we're not talking about a "creative re-enactment" of passages from the Book of Matthew, you kilt-liftin', mango-slimin', spay cam porn-watchin' perv!

"spay cam porn"????? I ask you!

After another Bible publisher backed out, NavPress had agreed to publish a New Testament paraphrase on behalf of XXXchurch.com, an anti-porn ministry.

The books, whose covers will read "Jesus Loves Porn Stars," will be distributed at porn-industry conventions later this year.

Well it's high time is what I say! Everyone knows that porn stars are entirely dedicated to the pursuit of biblical knowledge, if only of each other.

Now, in addition to gaining access to the words of God, it appears that they will also be allowed access to the words of Shakespeare, whom at least a few elderly, pipe-smoking, elbow-patched professors still believe is god. It's a little like a cargo cult, but with sherry instead of coconut rum.

Shakespeare...as you've never seen him before!

NEW YORK (Reuters) – A new television reality show invites porn stars to test their serious acting abilities in London's theater district, raising the question: Debbie can do Dallas, but can she take on Chekhov's "The Cherry Orchard?"

Well wasn't it Chekhov who said that if there's a gun on the wall in the first act, it must go off before the close of the third? Indeed, that's a principle that porn has taken to heart (and several other organs) far more than conventional theatre and cinema. "The money shot" indeed.

And while we wish said actresses all the luck in the world making this transition, it must be said that the material is ahead of them. Not Shakespeare: as far as I know he never even wrote a satyricon, much less a straight-up porn. Or even an at-an-awkward-angle one. But that classic of cheerleading cinema, Debbie Does Dallas has been denatured and played off-Broadway last year. And check out some cast bios. Things have cum full circle jerk.

Susan L. Schwartz (Debbie) Susan has been Debbie Does Dallas, and Off-Broadway too!preparing to play Debbie her whole life, beginning with her starring role as Molly Pitcher in her childhood performance of the WOMEN OF THE REVOLUTIONARY WAR. As a member of the Footlights while studying at Cambridge University, after two summers at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, and while studying at the National Theatre in London, everything was leading up to this moment.

Tonya Canada (Roberta) NYC credits include: THE CHERRY ORCHARD

I wonder if either of them were in Godspell? In any case, we can be sure that the complete story will be told in one of the Guardian's blogs.