No, I’m serious. Heavy Metal Mashups make an excellent Unicorn Chaser, particularly when mashed with Bollywood music. Click Play and trust me.

Iron Maiden vs Dhoom2

There, have your feet stopped moving? Aren’t you happy now? Grateful to me? You damn well should be, you ingrates. Here I am chained to a laptop in the accursed, barren land of Vangroover…

Vangroover, people. Yeah, this is the view

yeah, forget I said that. Anyway…I’ve got a lovely roundup of Unicorn Chasers for you today, including not just one but TWO, count ’em, TWO musical interludes. Here we present a Mexican Mariachi band (there is another kind of mariachi band?) performing that old Pink Floyd classic, The Wall.

Awww. And as if that weren’t enough, here’s the now-famous Boob Flash at tonight’s Canucks game. I seriously think the Green Men may be out of a job.

Contrary to the title, the boobs are not actually flashbulbs

And to make your Wednesday complete, we have yes, another roundup of celebrity gossip links! Oh! My! God! Can you freaking STAND it?!?!

Some people are too smart to fall for Nickelback. Like these Irish folk dancing PhD candidates. (raincoaster)

To serve man. With appropriate wines and side dishes. No really, this is a how-to article (ManoloFood)

Brad, Pitts. I liked Colin Farrell’s look better on Colin Farrell, did you? (Ayyyy)

My boyfriend wrote a book about me and here is my review of it. Oh, this should be juicy! (Crasstalk)

When duckfaces collide! Kim Kardashian and Snooki prepare to ruin popular entertainment for a generation. (AgentBedhead)

Teach me how to Dougie. Over and Over and Over and Over and Over and Over. (BusyBeeBlogger)

Dude looks like a lady…in the right light, if you squint a bit, so another dude said Sure, why not? (CelebDirtyLaundry)

Oh come ON! That’s Arnold in drag, you’re not fooling anyone. (CelebritySmack)

Kirk Cameron needs to adjust his medication. I don’t think Stephen Hawking ever did heroin. (CelebVIPLounge)

It’s Lady Gaga’s world. We just read magazines in it. Magazines that tell us it’s her world. (DailyStab)

Happy Birthday, Trent. My Future Husband is looking good! Nice of his current wife to warm him up for me (DippedInCream)

Eva’s revenge: ZsaZsa in a coma! Magda still dead. (EarSucker)

Vanessa Hudgens gives up on dreams of acting, joins Glee. She’ll be opening for Nickelback soon. (FitFabCeleb)

Fergie, Duchess of Pork, butters up the mealticket. God knows she’s unemployable (GirlsTalkinSmack)

and Liza and Halston were there, too! The world says good-bye to Oprah. (HaveUHeard)

Two and a half men. Your guess whether it’s Cryer, Kutcher or Jones who’s the half. (HollywoodHiccups)

I’m sorry but this is no Robert Redford. Or Nick the Narrator, for that matter. Not even a passable Sam Waterston. (INeedMyFix)

Tori Spelling doesn’t look a day over 45. No seriously, check this out. But bring your eyebleach. (MathewGuiver)

ABSNEY! Britney’s getting her body back, bitches! (PoorBritney)

Colin Firth soaking wet. Bubble bath. Wine. What are you still doing reading this? (Swoonworthy)

This is not the dress with which to wear a novelty bra, darling! Reality stars: You can dress them up…wait, no, you can’t. (TheSkinny)

Lady Gaga guards the mouth of Hell. This explains a great deal, if you really think about it. (TheSkinnyChic)

Selah.