enjoy studying great tits? Have I got a report for you!

Joan Collins, during the reign of Queen Victoria 

Researchers at the EGI have been studying great tits in Wytham, Oxfordshire, since 1947.

Presumably some of their original subjects aren’t quite as great as they used to be, Joan Collins excepted, as always.

Here is the full report, which also explains why they can be different sizes. Bonus!

UPDATE: Metro claims in the comments that these are his tits, and that I should give Miss Cellania credit for them. I can only conclude that I do not know Metro as well as I thought, and that Miss Cellania must be a talented plastic surgeon as well as journalist.

What you don’t know about your friends, eh?

Courtney Love, visual marketing genius

So, courtney, what did you used to do for a living?

So Courtney, what did you used to do for a living?

Really, who knew she was so literal-minded?

from Go Fug Yourself:

…the implementation of an unexpected hair-hook is utterly great. Think of it: If at the end of the night her handlers can’t pry her out of that confusing gold lame jacket with fur trim, they can just give up and hang her entire body up in the closet.

wasn’t this a Stockard Channing movie?

anyone got a HandiWipe?Why, yes it was. The Girl Most Likely To, it was called, and she did, too. Kind of a comically morbid and vindictive updating of the Georgy Girl story; every chubby teenager’s favorite Midnite Movie O’ The Week, well, next to Satan’s School for Girls. That shit just never gets old. I remember a great scene where she’s upstairs at some old farmhouse and gets her old cheerleading rival to demonstrate a series of backflips…and opens the window at the end of the hall…

As she lay bandaged in the recovery room, Joyner was poisoned by a nurse anesthetist who believed Joyner had stolen her boyfriend back in high school some 30 years ago, authorities say.

Imagine what would happen to Special K (not to mention The nurse will see you now...but you won't like it!most of Hollywood including the music industry) once the word gets out that the jilted ex-girlfriends of men you’ve long since forgotten could be the ones behind the needle. And those surgical masks make it very difficult to recognize people…coincidence? I think if you do the research you’ll find a disgruntled, now-middle-aged jiltista was behind their design.

The AP via the Guardian has all the gory details. Enjoy!

typo o’ the day: Queen Elizabeth, Queen bee

via both Fark and Gawker, and I think it’s the beer-drinking nerds who had the wittier commentary (“and boy are her ovaries tired” vs “and now we really want to see that movie”) for once.

Typo o' the decade? On the other hand, she does have four kids. God only knows how many Philip has.

Harry Potter wants YOU!

 Daniel Radcliffe wants you, baby!

This is not the first we’ve heard of the pervy Potter perp. No indeedy, not. A pattern is starting to emerge, one that we should have anticipated from the moment he flung a condom atop Dame Diana Rigg‘s head.

The boy is insatiable!

Several sources agree: first, there was the evidence from Ricky Gervais‘ backstage candid camera, then came a comment casually dropped by Kelly and another dropped by Metro, and now we see that the Ins and Outs post (yeah, that‘s what I’d call ins and outs, too) about Daniel Radcliffe’s Match.com profile has made it to the Top Blogs in WordPress.

That, my friends, is corroboration.

Potter on the prowl