I wouldn't trust myself to review this book. Like the Necronomicon, this is a book best read by those you really wouldn't miss if it came right down to it. If you heard they'd become members of a sinister cult and had taken off to Arabia to rendezvous with a malevolent and unspeakably long-lived nobleman from Eastern Europe, to search for the Nameless City in the shifting sands of the desert, and you really wouldn't mind, then that's the person you should ask to review this book.
Because that means reading it. And that means the thetans will know you're out there. To say nothing of Tom Cruise.
Dianetics, Reviewed by Fat Joe Thomas, whom I do not know and so wouldn't particularly miss and who seems to have vanished from the blogosphere on or about April 4,
THE VERY DAY AFTER POSTING THIS REVIEW!
Half-way through this book, I wanted to stop reading. But, it wouldn’t let me. It made me finish. I couldn’t return it and get my money back and I couldn’t stop reading it. If I ever have kids, the book is going to make my kids read it. The book has put my family and friends under surveillance. They don’t want to talk to me anymore. They’re worried the book will take their money, too.
There have been many memorable moments in George Bush's career – invading Iraq, declaring the war "accomplished", Hurricane Katrina. But the US president recalled that his greatest moment in office had come not on the field of battle but while out fishing.
Asked by Germany's Bild am Sonntag newspaper what he considered to be his greatest triumph, President Bush replied: "I've experienced many great moments. It's hard for me to name the greatest." He went on: "I would say that the best moment of all came when I caught a seven-and-a-half pound perch while fishing on my lake."
From The Guardian. And you know, I don't doubt for a second that it was the high point of his life so far. Failed oilman, failed businessman, cokehead and alcoholic, a man who nearly lost the battle for his life to a pretzel, George W. Bush is indeed the worst, most embarassing leader that the United States has ever had to endure.
On May 1, International Worker's Day, May Day, Sploid published a tender retrospective of the man the world has come to know as "that dumbass."
It remains one of the proudest moments in American history, and it was only three years ago today. On May 1, 2003, the president piloted a military jet onto an aircraft carrier and told a cheering crowd that we had won the war in Iraq.
"Major combat operations in Iraq have ended. In the battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed," President George W. Bush said to wild applause.
But in this crazy world we live in where "victory" so often means "pathetic failure," winning the war in Iraq somehow ended up meaning losing the war in Iraq.
On May 1 of 2003, America had lost 139 troops to the invasion and occupation of Iraq. Today that number stands at 2,400. In the three years since we won the war, 17,000 more soldiers have been wounded — many of them mangled beyond recognition and doomed to live their remaining days without arms or legs.
The victory pushed "insurgent attacks" up from eight per day back in 2003 to 75 per day in 2006.
Three years after the war was won, the American price tag has risen from about $80 billion to more than $320 billion, and the commander in chief has dropped from a 70% approval rate to disapproval ratings unseen since the last criminal days of Richard Nixon's presidency.
Almost all Americans now believe the president intentionally lied about every aspect of the Iraq invasion and occupation. And a dismal 9% believes the mission was accomplished, according to a new CNN poll.
But there's some good news for the president on this third anniversary of the victory in Iraq: Despite everything that's happened and everything that's known, he remains a free man and still occupies the White House. Amazingly, Bush and his team have yet to be removed from office, prosecuted, convicted of treason, imprisoned or executed.
And that's a victory, too.
Because if you work in a factory rather than an office, being known to sleep with the boss is a status enhancer. Or even the guy who delivers the diesel fuel, come to think of it.
But in the spirit of making ourselves of practical use here at the raincoaster blog, rather than just providing random titillation and eagle voyeurism, we present the New Zealand Herald's Ten rules to help you survive a sneaky affair at the office by Julie Fisher, about whom her coworkers are no doubt gossiping madly even as you read this.
Avoid the photocopier
Do not be tempted to do it on the photocopier. Not even in an ironic way. Canon last year confirmed that it has had to increase the thickness of its glass to cope with an alarming number of bottom-related breakages. A third of Canon technicians say they have had to mend machines that have been sat on. "It's so tempting, particularly if neither of you particularly likes the company you're working for," says Cox. "But not only will you probably break the thing, it's uncomfortable."
I once sat through a quarterly job evaluation that began when my boss brought up the topic of married men, and how normal it was that they had mistresses, and how glamorous that was for the "pampered, adored" mistress. There are times when you can't quite believe what you're hearing, and for raincoaster here this was one of those times. So she said, "well, I sure would make a crappy #2 girl," to which he replied, "Oh no, I think you would make an excellent #2."
Beat.
To which I replied, slowly, "I sure hope I'm going to get an 'Outstanding' on this review, Doug, because otherwise I'm going to go far and wide with my dissatisfaction with this rather unusual review."
Beat.
To which he replied, "Oh, I think you'll do very well for yourself at this company."
I got my Outstanding, too. And by god I earned it; the ability to blackmail a boss is a critical business skill in certain environments.
and raincoaster luvs them right back. I grabbed this little ninjargasmic beauty from the Generator Blog, which we came to via Fark, and which we may never leave. A small sampling of the contents:
emo haiku generator, eg
sitting here in pain
I can do nothing but frown
I cry about dad!business plan generator
random monster generator
etc etc.
raincoaster 