Category Archives: Humour

the 86 rules of boozing, by the world’s greatest experts

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From the truly amusing Modern Drunkard magazine, and coming, as all good things do, through the Baby Jebus.

86 rules...you'll be lucky to remember five of them after the third drink...

54. Never lie in a bar. You may, however, grossly exaggerate and lean.

14. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she refuses, she does not like you.

15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.

16. If she buys you a drink, she likes you.

tag, I’m it.

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no, that's not me. But boy, would I look that smug if I lived there!So…five things you STILL don’t know about me, eh? Fine, I’ve got a lot of secrets; I could be doing these until the cows come home and not run out of material, particularly since I have never had any cows, so if they showed up they would still not count as coming home, so there.

Naomi and DefrostIndoors have both tagged me for the 5 Things You Don’t Know About Me meme, and I’ve put them off long enough. Here goes.

  1. the raven is my totem animal, and yes, I went on a spiritquest to find this out.
  2. I have always wanted to own Krak des Chevaliers and I’d live in it, too, regardless how primitive and drafty it was.
  3. I’d consider the Bunsen Lake power station an adequate substitute. Or Urquhart Castle on Loch Ness. What can I say, I’m just not a cottage-y person.
  4. I have quite a thing for old, decayed mirrors that have gone all fuzzy, and once tried to have one shipped back from Indonesia. It cost me five bucks to buy, would have cost something like two hundred to ship, so no dice.
  5. My family used to own a haunted inn, and I was always jealous of people who could see the ghost; I only ever heard him.

So now I have to pass this along? Alrighty, then. I tag…hmmm, I’ll have to think about this. I’m running out of friends. While I’m thinking, you can read Geoffrey Chaucer‘s answers.

quiz: which art ism are you?

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This is just too good not to share, particularly in light of this answer from earlier today.

“La seule difference entre moi et un fou, c’est que je ne suis pas fou.”


You Are Surrealism

I Saw Three Cities


Dreamy and idealistic, you’ve created a world that is all your own. It’s very likely that you’ve either dabbled in drugs or are naturally trippy. You are always trying to push beyond the boundaries of your culture and society.You believe that art, love, and freedom can change the world.

What Art Movement Are You?

the custody battle from hell

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This is a dead dog. Just wait for it.Oooooh, this isn’t going to end well.

The short version is:

  • a woman’s dog died at the vet.
  • Someone claiming to be a friend of hers picked it up.
  • Turns out that was no friend; it was her ex-husband.
  • Now she wants the dog back, but he says he’s going to bury it instead, nyeah, nyeah.
  • The charge is larceny.

Thank god some couples don’t have children: they are children.

googlewhack hack attack!

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Ever googlewhacked? It’s an activity highly recommended for those slow Saturday nights when you’ve got no pressing chores, a pot of tea at your elbow, and a highly caffeinated imagination. And, now, a tool to hack it with!

Look what I found! From Gooogie, via the Generator Blog. Yeah, come to think of it…that IS what I meant to search for.

george...right, it was george!