I win! My royal is prettier than yours!
I got this (sadly unembeddable) quiz from Archie, and it is, let me put this plainly, the fucking shizznit. I mean, how did it know that Carl Philip and I were destined for one another (and who wants to break it to the poor boy?)? I’m looking forward to a royal wedding of my own, very soon. You’re all invited, as long as you’re bringing us something in a bottle for the pressie.
Emo News Network Presents!
Yes, it’s that very special time on the blog: the time when we dump all our celebrity links for the day because we are too lazy/stressed/drunk/busy to do a real, proper 250 words for you. So hold your nose and swallow like a good little media consumer! YAY CELEBUTARDS!
Speaking of which, here’s an adorkable little video of children reacting to Rebecca Black‘s immortal musical meisterwerk, Friday.
via Gawker
It's FRIDAY! Time to peel those scales off your eyes!
If you’ve wondered, along with the rest of the internet, about the root cause of Rebecca Black’s sudden, irresistable stardom, may I suggest a close viewing of the following will clear up all ambiguity.
All ambiguity.
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far. The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new dark age.
HP Lovecraft, The Call of Cthulhu
Image via Wikipedia
How do you solve a problem like Charlie Sheen? You can’t, because he’s so epically winning, right? BOOM! But you can try to come a bit closer to understanding him if you run him through a few filters first; it’s like watching an eclipse. The sheer awesomenosity could blind you if you didn’t apply some filters. So here is Jimmy Kimmel‘s interpretation of the Sheen interview, with visuals starring that other Charlie.
And since this post has already been user-tested for celebrity gossip addict appeal, here are your gossip links for Wednesday:
Baby on Board (raincoaster)
Nicole Kidman could use a sammich (Lolebrity)
London Fashion Week is for the birds (Ayyyy)
I scream! (ManoloFood)
He should fit right in with Lindsay and Gadaffi (AgentBedhead)
Charlie Sheen too busy winning to retain custody of his kids (BusyBeeBlogger)
Justin Bieber sells out to rich witch doctor? (CelebDirtyLaundry)
A simple summit with Lady Gaga (CelebritySmack)
Robert Pattinson cheats on Tai (CelebVIPLounge)
Babies: totally Team Coco (CityRag)
Katie “Sue” Holmes (DailyStab)
Kim Kardashian, Saviour of Autotune (Earsucker)
Save Oprah! (FitFabCeleb)
Another sign Russia is in desperate straights (GirlsTalkinSmack)
Oh man, the ski lobby hates celebrities (HaveUHeard)
ScarJo publicly toejobs Sean Penn (INeedMyFix)
Oh Em Jee, the Oscars are about to get awesome (MathewGuiver)
Britney’s V shots (PoorBritney)
Sad Mugshot Xtina is sad (PopBytes)
Amanda Seyfried’s magically transforming Doc Martens (TheSkinny)
Five Angels, only two backsides among them (TheSkinnyChic)
Willow Smith's new do: Let's see her try to whip THAT back and forth
She’s had another makeover, it appears. Here’s her new video for that Wonder’s One Hit, I Whip My Hair Back and Forth.
Oh, these kids today!
And now, as a sort of mindless mind’s eye bleach, here are your celebrity gossip links, today brought to you by CORN!
Britney Spears is corny (Lolebrity)
Just say YES to creamed corn and ketchup with this delicacy (Manolofood)
“Evergreen” is still the top kernel of corn (raincoaster)
Joan Collins’ liquor is a little more rarefied (ayyyy)
Gaga’s brains are totally frittata (AgentBedhead)
Chris CORNell (BusyBeeBlogger)
Duelling cornballs, nobody wins! (CelebDirtyLaundry)
Bagel-to-Perogy communications perfected (DippedInCream)
Kingston’s just a niblet off the ol’ cob (CelebritySmack)
What the Adele? Isn’t WalMart too cornepone? (CelebVIPLounge)
Elisabetta Corn-all-ass (CityRag)
Aw, shucks, Canada’s hottest export returns! (DailyStab)
Gaga’s husky voice comes from the Whiskey Yoga Diet (GirlsTalkinSmack)
I always forget which one is Korny (FitFabCeleb)
Bieber creamed! (SeriouslyOMG)
Daniel Radcliffe is all Aw Shucks (CeleBitchy)
She’s a niblet, and shrinking! (TheSkinny)
Nice stalks! (GossipTeen)
Is that a corncob in your pocket, Brad, or??? (HaveUHeard)
Simon Cowell is picking Canada’s best crop of niblets (INeedMyFix)
If Gwyneth Paltrow is a vegan, does that make her a cannibal? (AmyGrindhouse)
Britney got her silks combed (PoorBritney)
Sui, Sui, pig, pig, pig (PopBytes)
Mariah’s ready to pop (EvilBeet)
raincoaster 