pepe the prawn on the latest dvd offerings

Prawn, Squid, what’s the diff, when it come down to the cool factor?

Hollywood Star o’ the Day: a bi-fecta of Cloris Leachman!

It appears that no force, however decadent, can resist the sheer human power of Cloris Leachman, in her eighties, giving it her showbiz all. Both the Fuggers and Defamer, two of the most selfconsciously jaded sites around, have fallen for Nurse Rached.

The Fuggers:

If you had said to me a year ago, “Heather, sometime in August 2006, you will see a photograph of Cloris Leachman wearing a foot-eating boho skirt, a strange, puffy white shirt, and a belt made of strips of leather that sits Federline-low — and she will not only look drunk, but she will be holding a keg over her head like she’s about to Donkey Kong that thing through a row of frat boys,” I would have smiled, told you that you looked very pretty in that outfit, and promptly delivered you to the nearest House of Bedlam, where you and your insane babble clearly would have belonged.

Cloris and Keg!

And from Defamer where, for once, no one dared defame the star:

Defamer Frozen Moments: Cloris Leachman Shows The Kids How It’s Done At ‘Beerfest’ Premiere
 At last night’s Grauman’s Chinese Theatre premiere of Beerfest, once octogenarian star Cloris Leachman was gently lowered back onto her feet by director Jay Chandrasekhar after completing a potentially life-threatening, five-minute keg stand, she punctuated the unexpected display of her incredible drinking capacity by hoisting aloft the fully drained keg and emitting a belch so powerful that it cracked the slab of concrete in the nearby courtyard containing Judy Garland’s handprints. “Top that, you little bitches,” challenged Leachman as she strolled past her much younger, tragically lightweight castmates and into the screening.

Thus, a Hollywood legend is born.

travel fun with Austin Powers

Oops, I mean Mardin Azad Amin. Who can tell them apart, Yeah, Baby!at least from a certain angle? From NBC via BoingBoing:

Mardin Azad Amin found himself in a tight squeeze last week when security at O’Hare Airport discovered a suspicious-looking object in his luggage. So Amin, 29, handled the delicate situation this way: He told security the object was a bomb, Cook County prosecutors said. The security guard then asked Amin to repeat what he’d said to a supervisor. This time, Amin was chuckling as he spoke, prosecutors said. In fact, Amin was trying to disguise the fact that the black object — resembling a grenade — was a component for a penis pump. …

What can we tell about Amin from this reading comprehension exercise, boys and girls?

That he’s hung like a hamster and none too bright. They are gonna love him in The Big House.

Defamer personals: humiliate a huge movie star

Who's that guy?Well, frankly, if I knew what I would get I might be up for this.

But really, the chance of ending up with a Jan Michael Vincent or a badly-aging Greg Evigan are just too high.

 So let’s go to the transcript:

from Craigslist:

HUGE star looking for homely companion – 45 I’m a HUGE blockbuster movie star.All I want is a homely woman that will beat and humiliate me.

I’m soooooo tired of perfect eager starlets. I want the REJECTED chunky girls. The wallflowers.

Former porn stars, strippers, and whores that nobody wants to touch are exactly what I’m looking for. Homeless single mother meth addicts are perfect.

Come and get it.

From Craigslist (via bitter PA?), via Defamer.Masked man

[Image note: We randomly picked George Clooney from the pool of actors born in 1961, but Michael J. Fox, Steven Weber, or any other of the names would’ve made fine black-bar models.]

South Park: the Secret Doctrine of Scientology

Is it any wonder I love these guys? Fearless!