quiz: which evil criminal are you?

Oh great. Fine. Jeez, I was hoping for Castro. Or FDR. What a letdown.

Sorry, Japan!

Congratulations, you’re President Harry S. Truman!

Due to the death of President Roosevelt, you became President of the United States of America on April 12th, 1945 – just at the tail end of World War Two. Japan had offered a surrender in January, and once you were in power, attempted again in May. In July, they offered surrender at least six times.

In August, against Roosevelt’s known wishes and the wishes of many of your advisors, you dropped an atomic bomb on the Japanese city Hiroshima, and another one on Nagasaki. Literally hundreds of thousands of innocent civilians died; many, many more suffered horrible sicknesses from the radiation. As Eisenhower put it: “the Japanese were ready to surrender and it wasn’t necessary to hit them with that awful thing.”

If you wish, you can proudly tell the world that you unnecessarily levelled an entire population with the following fine graphic:

I am Truman.

Which Evil Criminal are You?
A Rum and Monkey crime.

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the open source resistance meeting: edited footage

Whaaaaaaaa! Why does LA have all the cool resistance meetings? They don’t have any actual resisters down there in the first place! Tell that Reznor to get his sorry ass up here to the Republic of East Vancouver like, now, or I’ll sic Greenpeace on him. He’ll get his butt Birkenstomped!

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Russian positivism

From Popbitch:

RIP Yeltsin. The best quote on his presidency came
from his prime minister, Viktor Chernomyrdin,

“We hoped for the best, but things turned out as usual.”

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David Halberstam’s last speech

David Halberstam in Vietnam 

From, of all places, Business Week (via Gawker) we present the last speech of David Halberstam, greatest journalist of his generation and one of the immortals in a field which was pioneered by other lightweights like Jonathan Swift and Voltaire. I can’t say it any better than Business Week did, so let’s go to the article:

History, after all, was a favorite theme of this lion of American journalism. In 1955, after graduating from Harvard, Halberstam took a job at The Daily Times Leader in West Point, Miss., because he thought it would provide him an opportunity to write about race. When that didn’t work out as he had planned, Halberstam hitchhiked up to Nashville and put in an application at The Tennessean.

There, he wrote about race with a vengeance. In 1960, The New York Times lured him away. In 1964, when Halberstam was 30, he and Malcolm Browne of the Associated Press won Pulitzers for their coverage of the Vietnam War and the overthrow of the Saigon regime.

In 1967, Halberstam quit daily journalism and began writing books. Over the next 40 years he wrote 21 books covering such topics as foreign policy, civil rights, business, and sports. His 1973 classic about the Vietnam War, The Best and the Brightest, described how and why the “ablest men to serve in the government this century” turned out to be “architects of the greatest American tragedy since the Civil War.”

In 1994, The Reckoning addressed the Japanese challenge to American automakers. And in 2000 The Powers that Be tackled the rise of the American media. Halberstam’s 21st book, The Coldest Winter, a look back at the Korean War, will be released this fall. “I think it’s my best work,” he said in his Apr. 21 speech.

transcript here

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sounds like a plan

like animal farm, but with fluorescents

Hey, it always worked for me. From the relatively insane Rum & Monkey, we present:

20 Indicators that Weeping at Work
May Be a Viable Plan Going Forward

Chair has become one with Nestene consciousness and keeps trying to nibble on bum.

Utopian vision for global democracy dashed by gel-haired colleague’s Daily Mail worldview.

Zombie army escaped again and appears to want IT support.

Oh noes, someone took two donuts.

Microsoft Office has become otherworldly sentient intelligence and still just wants to know if you’re writing a letter.

and so on…ah, the year I put in at the cubicle farm. Good times, good times. Okay, I confess: it was me who freed the zombie army and gave them your pager number.

So we know who I am: the question now becomes, who are you? Take the Office Moron quiz!

Which Office Moron Are You?

I'm great. Like gold.

Which Office Moron Are You?
Rum and Monkey: jamming your photocopier one tray at a time.
Congratulations, fool! You’re the incompetent egotist.

Every office has one. You stride in on your first day with no useful skills, an inane smile on your face, and plans for a variety of team-building exercises, meetings, extra-curricular activities and staff days out, all designed to win you favour with the boss.

The problem is, everyone else hates you. You’re loud, you’re arrogant, you’re dumber than management, and you insist on wearing really loud shirts to make yourself seem interesting. Even the IT manager is more socially aware – and the depressing thing is, you’ll probably run the company in ten years.

If you don’t get a pickaxe through your head first.

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