I love the “Next Blog” button on WordPress.com. I read the most interesting things that way. Today, after a far-too-long spell of nothing but missionary blog after mommy blog after missionary blog after mommy blog after real estate spammer, I came across the following, and let me tell you, it was refreshing.

In fact, it was so refreshing, let me tell you again.

It was refreshing.

There, I said it.

Well, it was.

I mean, how many “Gosh, Joe-Bob Junior is six months old today! I can hardly believe it, but it was his four month check up sixty days ago and I guess Susan’s mom says that makes it six months and Susan’s mom’s really smart. I hope I raise my youngsters like Susan’s mom. Susan turned out really cool. Not like me, lol, my mother would look at me and say “Your a mess” well i am, and i mean to lose this baby weight i WILL but it all takes time and meanwhile I am a BIG BEAUTIFUL WOMAN not some stick figure like those girls on the tee vee that Big Joe-Bob watches all the time,” can you really read without wanting to put your fist through the cathode ray tube and saw through your carotid artery with the shards of glass?

Not too many.

And along came this:

I want talk singlis and bad engrish today.

I grow so many fats. Now I like pig so fat like that. EEEEEEE. Last time I smile can see cheekbones, now see what? FATS. I go jogging jus now and I cannot run at all lor. My legs like make of metal like that.

Now I wan to slim down! ON DIET! But also mus exercise lor.

Anywayssxzxz, I sood be in GENTING NOW. But I in SINGAPORE!!! I HATE O’S AND PRELIMS!!!!!!!! dRiViNg mE cRaZyYyYy!!!!!!!

Yes, apparently they are.

But still, think about it. One of the things everyone slobbers all over Hemingway for is his unique use of language. And, really, it’s the only thing going for Dickens besides the broad appeal of mawkishness. This blog entry is, I suggest, as different from the run of the mill English you read as Runyon or Shakespeare, and possibly even Spencer.

And far more amusing.

:: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: ::