what really happened down there?

squid vs yellow submarine, guess who wins? 

It was the Sixties; nobody was straight enough to really keep track. Still, it was a horrible shock when I found out what had actually happened to the Beatles‘ famed Yellow Submarine.

In a Summer of Love polychromatic perverse update of HP Lovecraft’s The Call of Cthulhu, the hapless yet peaceable vessel and flagship of the Flower Child Armada was seized by the forces of our recrudescent Cthulhu cult and is even now being “repurposed” for who knows what unnameable role in the coming ApoCthalypse! Checking out that last link, I think we can all understand what happened to the crew…poor sods.

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10 counting cat, the motion picture

From the Shebeen Club‘s April presenter, artist and publisher Robert Chaplin. This short film, based on his book 10 Counting Cat, is obviously the perfect present for your budding Goth. You can see the world’s smallest book, Teeny Ted from Turnip Town, right here on the ol’ raincoaster blog.

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getting oral is good for you

barracuda, not exactly doctor fish although they will eat you if you ask nicely 

No, seriously. Getting eaten by fish is the latest craze (and there’s a reason they call it that) in health.

And this has nothing to do with that nasty fetish video of that horrible Cockney woman and the eels…

The Guardian reports on how the delicate mouthings of imported Turkish doctorfish bring relief from psoriasis (and also confirm for me that when old people take a bath it’s really just soup). And Mainichi backs them up.

…doctor fish seem happy to devour any old epidermis – in fact, the older and thicker the better (if you put a child in the water next to an old person, the fish will apparently go for the old person)…

Exfoliation is a key part of any skin beautifying treatment. But forget salt scrubs, rubs and foot files. Why not try something far more efficient: the toothless mouths of hundreds of tiny, voraciously feeding fish?

doctorfish chowing down“Doctor fish” – so named for their ability to produce healthy, glowing results from even the most crusty or diseased epidermis – are the key ingredient in a spa and skin treatment becoming increasingly popular across Japan, China, Turkey and Europe. The idea is that you immerse your feet, hands or, if you are brave enough, your entire body in a warm pool that swarms with hundreds of hungry minnow-sized feeders. The fish zoom in on your most crusty, flaky or scabby skin and chomp away at it to reveal the fresh layer beneath…

I’m pretty sure I saw a porno like that once. Ever noticed how much women’s porn is set in spas? Yeah, that’s right: I bet this story is just a very clever code. John Donne would be proud.

He was a filthy old bugger.

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by request 2

Coyote on train in Portland. Wow, that is one advanced transit system!The digestive system of a coyote. I’ve no idea why anyone would come to my blog searching for the digestive system of a coyote, but there are worse places to look: I’ve probably got one under one of these piles of laundry…

The digestive systems of all canids are remarkably alike and they all function in the same way. The overall length of the canid digestive tract is short although it remains relative to the size of the dog. This aids in rapid digestion of raw meat. Their simple monogastric stomach is a storage organ capable of holding large amounts of nutrient dense meat and fat. The other function of the stomach is to secrete concentrated solutions of hydrochloric acid, which create the highly acidic environment necessary for initiating digestion of protein in meat and bones as well as destroying pathogenic bacteria that may be ingested.The small intestine is responsible for digestion and for the absorption of nutrients. The carnivore’s gut is extremely efficient at digesting protein and fat, as long as there is little or no carbohydrate (grain-starch) present. Experiments which have measured the amounts of various nutrients eaten and compared these with the amounts passed in canine feces have shown that a healthy animal loses no more than four percent of its fat intake and only a trace of protein. The digestive efficiency of raw meat is 95% and takes place in 2 to 3 hours.The small intestine joins with the large intestine through a small appendage called the cecum. While this has no real purpose in a carnivore, it should be acknowledged as this is a key difference between a carnivore and an herbivore. By the time the food has passed through the animal’s small intestine, the process of digestion and absorption of the nutrients in the food is complete. The large intestine has only one function, which is to extract fluids and form waste material where it is stored in the rectum until it is expelled. The gastrointestinal tract of a carnivore is virtually sterile as most bacteria and other micro-organisms are destroyed by hydrochloric acid in the stomach. Those bacteria that are not eliminated are seldom able to survive the digestive processes. The colon is the exception, as it houses a variety of organisms which form vitamins such as pyridoxine, vitamin B-12, biotin, vitamin K and folic acid.

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if it smells like a fish, eat it

I stole that from a Republican, and if all Republicans thought that way I’d be nicer to them.

It’s a fish roundup for Good Friday here on the ol’ raincoaster blog; my Catholic ancestors must be recrudescent this weekend (is some chippy Brit going to get up my nose about using big words again? I love that: fresh prey).

the toothsome tiger fish 

The fearsome, toothy Tiger fish from the Congo; why would the Congo have tiger fish if Africa has no tigers? Eh? Can you answer me that?

Thai Catfish

This Thai Mekong catfish at 2.7 meters long (9 feet, give or take) may be the biggest freshwater fish ever caught. Gallery of giant Thai catfish photos here, array of giant Thai catfish breaded filets TBA.

Just a side note: the fish was alive when caught, and was injected with fertility drugs so it could be used in a breeding program. Whatever was in the drugs, it died that day, and uh, well, uh, one doesn’t want to make pointed remarks about the intelligence or lack thereof of Thai people, but they ate it. That same day.

Alaskan rockfish

This Alaskan Rockfish is estimated between 90 and 120 years old, which would put its birth back in the pre-Information-or-Otherwise-Superhighway days, indeed, back before horseless carriages. It, too, has ended up as fish sticks. Bon appetit!

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