Breaking fast: Necronomicon Found!

Damn. I knew I left it someplace!Cthulhu sees you!

Fortunately, the British police have no idea what they've found. "Anthropodermic bibliopegy" indeed; they're just trying to normalize this to prevent a global panic. The fools! Mwahahahahaha.

When you happen to find an old book that you can't read, bound in human skin and lying by the side of the road in small-town nowheresville, your first reaction shouldn't be: gee, I can't read this, so it must be an old ledger. And it's just lying here, so it must have been dropped during a robbery of…that barn there. Or the sheep pen. Or maybe the badger hole. I'm sure it must be fairly common. People are always dropping old ledgers bound in human skin by the side of the road after committing robberies that have gone completely unreported and unnoticed. Happens all the time.

Honestly, is a Hound attack so implausible in that light?

This news surfaced the day after I'd made cheap jokes at the expense of Leeds, and just as I was putting together a blog entry on Ernest Angley. Not that there's any relationship between these completely independent incidents.

The End Times Are Upon Us! It's Easter, just the right time of the year for an Apocalypse. And it will be blogged, people.

Cthulhu ftagn, Cthulhu RSS!

Cthulhu peeps

The Five Fists of Science

The Five Fists of Science 

Is this not the whackest shizzle you evah seen, niggaz? (is that how that is pronounced? I'm using an online translator here, cut me some slack) A snip from the Boingboing post:

Matt Fraction shares a sneak-preview of his forthcoming graphic novel, The Five Fists of Science, starring Mark Twain and Nikola Tesla in a race to save the world from Thomas Edison and J.P Morgan. "Best part? It's true. Almost," says Matt.

You know some underachieving physics grad is going to be living his dreams through this.

Back cover copy. If you listen closely, you can hear Thomas Dolby, I swear:

SCIENCE!
No longer the realm of the fop, the dandy, or the physicist!
SCIENCE!
No longer the purview of landed gentry or the monied upper classes
SCIENCE is TODAY! SCIENCE is NOW!
SCIENCE IS FOR YOU!

Come one and come all, to this, a grand old adventure
in a brand new tradition
the penny dreadful
the pulp adventure
the escapist fantasy
the pictotrash compendium
THE GRAPHIC NOVEL
THE FIVE FISTS OF SCIENCE

join
MR. MARK TWAIN
(aka Samuel Clemens)
— and —
MR. NIKOLA TESLA
(aka Master of Lightning)
in a white knuckle thriller
AS THEY SAVE THE VERY WORLD

not recommended for the soft or the sissy
the weak at heart
or
the dull of mind

THE FIVE FISTS
of SCIENCE!
TWAIN! TESLA!
AMERICA:
You cannot spell “action & adventure” without
T & T
!!!

As told by Messers Fraction & Sanders, Kansas City, Missouri
and published by Image Comics, Berkeley, CA.

AT LONG LAST
SCIENCE FOR THE COMMON MAN
SCIENCE FOR THE WORKING MAN
SCIENCE FOR EVERY MAN!
Fear it! Feel it!

THE FIVE FISTS
of SCIENCE!
Do you dare
READ IT?

a shoe drops in Vancouver

Now I know why I've been on a Tina Brown fixation Tina Brown Hairdothe past couple of days. It's worrisome, it can't be healthy, and it'll probably result in an unfortunately feathered hairdo if it goes on too long.

Yep, now I know exactly what my brain was trying to tell me. It's true what some of the mellower religious figures say. All things do come to those who wait, if by things you mean things like memories. And a fair few other things come to those who simply interview.

When [20-year-old] Tina took up with Harold Matthew Evans — forty-six at the time and married, with three children — she was selecting for herself one of the most remarkable, successful, and attractive men in all of Britain, and very likely one of the most vulnerable as well.

Hmmm, where's my damn phone? I gots calls to make.George Headphones

"Why, hello there George!"

Welcome to the blogroll: Fat Joe Thomas

Possibly the best book review site ever. Let's take a look, shall we?

A review of:

How to Know God :

DeepakizzleThe Soul’s Journey into the Mystery of Mysteries by Deepak Chopra

This is one of the most stunning books I've ever read. It is a complete 160-degree turnaround from how he had been. In this book he realizes he's no longer angry, it's time to make friends and be happy. And, then, not weeks after the publication, he is gunned down by the East Coast individualists. The feud between the two coasts has been raging for too long. The West Coast spiritualists (led by Deepak) hate the East Coast individualists. No one really knows the cause of the rivalry, but some people think it started when Neal Donald Walsch (an East Coaster) said Deepak looked like Dr. Segal. At any rate, these two groups have hated each other ever since.

And, that hatred was certainly evident in Deepak's works. His 1992 book Perfect Heath: Sumpin the East Coast Know Nothin' 'Bout was a bitter tongue lashing against his rivals. And, nothing stung more than these lines from 1990's Quantum Healing: Deepak 4Ever Y'all — "When the spirit of life swells within you/kick that mofo sucka out/coz the East is the beast/and they got nothin ta pray about".

Operation Global Media Domination: Egg Day

TIADon’t ask me why. Blog works in mysterious ways. But today, if you’ll just scroll down and see, is Egg Day. If you’re feeling generous, you can even include the post from yesterday about the trichinosis worms (I mean, it’s the eggs that getcha, right? and there were millions of the wee buggers, so that’s gotta count for at least one, right?).

But it’s a sure bet that Egg Day is not gonna rock the same hits as Gay Pirate Day.

Yesterday we welcomed many, many intellectuals to our blog; for one thing, they loved to hate on the Margaret Atwood. For another, their searches included Nobel Prize winners, Geoffrey Chaucer, the New Testament, and a poignant question about whether or not The Scorpions still count as celebrities.

No.

On the other hand, today they’re back looking for that elusive Narnia Porn. Other searched-for items included free porn movies of nutty sex yelling sex porn SOMALI SEX MOVIE somali porn movies aslan porn. And Mitsou, but that’s hardly an improvement. So here, for all you pervy, unsatisfied, yet counted-on-an-equal-basis-with-Ernest-Hemingway-scholar fetishists, we present your Narnia fix:

Narnia