Let’s all hate Toronto! Wait…WHERE?

Why, you ask…to which I reply, ever been there? Here’s the must-see movie of the year, coming soon to a theatre anywhere but Toronto.

 

From the movie’s site:

If there’s one thing that truly unites Canadians it’s our national pastime of bashing Toronto. The first film on the subject, Let’s All Hate Toronto is a hilarious tongue-in-cheek road doc. The film follows “Mister Toronto” as he embarks on a coast-to-coats Toronto Appreciation tour, encountering “recovering Torontonians” and those who would be quite happy never to step foot in TO.

Is Toronto really Torauma, Onterrible? Yes, according to a “professional Toronto hater.” And in Calgary they finally discover the answer to a question that has boggled them for ages: why do all the trees point west? (“Because Toronto sucks that much.”)

Now, this all sounds fairly straightforward, and I, of all people, am not one to dismiss something that unites all of our great, yet divided, nation (really, only laughing at Conrad Black comes anywhere near close) but there is one little problem, one teensy thing preventing me from joining in the risibling and the ridiculizing.

What is this “Toronto” of which they speak?

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the problem with public computers

is, of course, the public.

The one that’s bugging me now is not masturbating, reading the screen aloud, clutching himself and rocking back and forth, or drooling, but he IS playing a disco version of “Son of a Preacherman” that makes Gunther look like Bach.

But at least he’s not reading over my shoulder.

Chris Crocker: You fuck with Britney, you deal with ME!

It’s rare, even in our celebrity-obsessed culture, to find an expression of fandom that is pure, hearfelt, honest, tragic, tearful and absolutely hilarious.

But I found one!

via Defamer, but I woulda found it anyway.

Chris Crocker is a STAR, bitches, a STAR!

UPDATE:

This video its own tribute fragrance now.

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Britney at the 2007 VMA’s: White Girl’s Rhythm

My god, girl. All you have to do is lip synch and dance for a living. Can it be that hard? Even I can dance better than this…and I’m about that chubby, too. This is as good an example of phoning it in as I’ve ever seen, and the audience reaction shots are priceless; their jaws are hanging, and not because she’s so hot!

Come to think of it, my roots are greasy as well. Shit, where’s my fifty million dollars? Perez Hilton‘s got a thread going: it’s called “How Bad was Britney, Y’All?” and it has 6100 comments and counting…

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Operation Global Media Domination: The Flamewar Situation UPDATE!

TIA

* Boss emailed me: he loves Flamewar B
* Flamewar C is well under way!