How to: spend your carbon tax rebate

My cousin emailed me this. No idea where she stole it from, because for once it didn’t have a hundred thousand email addresses in the forwarding history:

The provincial government is sending each of us a $100 Carbon Tax rebate.

If we spend it at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China.

If we spend it on gasoline, the money will go to the Arabs.

If we purchase a computer it will go to India.

If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala.

If we purchase a good car, it will go to Japan.

If we purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan,

and none of it will help the B.C. economy.

The only way to keep the money here at home is to spend it on prostitutes, weed,

beer and tattoos since these are the only products still produced in British Columbia.

Thank you for your help and please support B.C.

The Laughing Baby of YouTube

I know we’re all about the YouTubes this week, but this one is just too damn good to miss. A sweet, wee baby laughing and having fun. Awwww! Isn’t she cute? So why am I reflexively clutching this crucifix?

and it all means nothing more than…HEY! SHINY!

Modern Existence

Britney Spears’s favorite sex tape: I Love You Cheetos!

Nine minutes of the most hardcore, cheez-food-product-dusted, size queeniest, sock wearingest action ever to grace the intertubes. This may not be safe for work, and it certainly isn’t safe for lunch. Make sure your digestive tract is clean before clicking Play.

From Jeff Ostergren, via Fleshbot

Those zombies on his site? Don’t look like my zombies. And the brains likewise; no wonder his zombies are so underfed and peaked looking!

Note To Self

re: wearing low-cut dresses:

Be careful when you wipe off the sweat. The normal rules do not apply.

Well, they apply. But people will stare. And then they will ask you for drinks.

I post this in case I forget. I got about three steps past the Alberni Street Liquor Store when some guy offered, “Brewsi?”

I walked past.

“That’s okay,” he said. “I’m a snob, myself.”