Category Archives: humor

Osama Bin Laden parties with pagans in the Eighties

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George Clooney then and now

Well, who doesn’t have a few embarrassing party pix or yearbook photos from the Eighties, eh? Why should Osama Bin Laden, who rocked the bell bottoms and turtleneck look as hard as anyone in the Seventies, escape this universal fate?

Turns out that during the Eighties he was living with the Kalasha tribesmen of the Chitral region of Pakistan, a strangely timeless Asiatic tribe documented by Wilfred Thesiger.

Chitral is also the home of the Kalasha, a unique pagan civilization that’s lived in the area for 2,000 years or more, now boxed in by an increasingly militant Islam. Thinly populated, Chitral covers 5,800 square miles, with war-torn Afghanistan to the north and west and the extremist strongholds of Swat and Dir to the south.

According to locals, bin Laden lived with a Kalasha family in Chitral for some time during his first Afghan jihad, against the Soviet Union in the 1980s. With his now much more severe ideology, the al Qaida leader wouldn’t be able to easily live among these polytheistic people, whose men and women mix freely…

Kalasha women also don’t cover, so was OBL covering his eyes the entire time? I doubt that.
And now he wants to fight polytheists? Osama Bin Laden: demeaning Islam in leaps in and bounds.

Hey, old habits die hard. I mean; did you SEE him in that turtleneck?

Lolebrity: Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds in NAFTA

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cross-posted from lolebrity, for I am very busy today and this one has crossover potential.

Sandra Bullock an Ryan Reynolds ar Canada an tha US

imaj: raincoaster
sorse: DListed

Sandy ar playin Canuckistani refugee.

Ryan ar playin America.

Pritty reel-listic if u ax me.

Britney Spears: Gimme More Jelly Babies!

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And now for something completely trivial: a unicorn chaser if you will.

Looks like Britney‘s come to terms with the fact that her post-childbirth figure will never return to the sveltitide of her Oops I Did It Again days. This new version of her comeback hit Gimme More is even more scandalous than the stripper-pole-themed original, as all the dancers in this version are completely naked, save for a tantalizing dusting of powdered sugar.

Wonder how she sneaked THAT past the censors at YouTube!

via UKPopSugar

(I always feel bad when I leave them out of the Ayyyy.com link roundup, because they always link back to us, but there’s only so much I can do with Jordan and Beth Ditto, ya know?)

Big Black Balls

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Do you like big, bouncing, black balls, all glistening wet and tumbling all over one another? Thousands and thousands of big, bouncing, black balls? Well, have we got some hawt pix for you!

Big black balls

Yes, 400,000 big black balls, bouncing all over one another in the bright sunlight. Don’t say we don’t come through on our promises around these parts.

It seems that the reservoir water on which LA depends has such a high bromide content that exposure to sunlight renders it poisonous, and the balls are to shield the water from the harmful sunlight. Think about that the next time you’re enjoying a glass of ice water on the patio at the Ivy.

Yes, big black balls save the city of Los Angeles. It’s like a Blaxploitation flick come to life! Video here.

Brian Atene in Black and White

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A little monologue for your Tuesday. I meant to post this yesterday for alliteration’s sake, but those pesky technical issues got in the way.