So I’m early for once in my life. This is worth watching two days in a row; possibly the finest moment in the history of situation comedy.
The WKRP turkey drop.
“As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”
For those of you who like your Thanksgiving memories with a side of acid, there’s William S. Burroughs’ Thanksgiving Prayer.
With a little tweaking this could work for George Michael, too. From commenter Gabe over on Gawker’s post about Doherty’s latest drug bust. Seriously, I think it must be some other dude who got Kate Moss pregnant; surely by now his body is incapable of producing anything but crack-flavoured vomit.
FROM NME.COM
POST DATE __/__/__ __:__ GMTPETE DOHERTY ARRESTED ON DRUGS CHARGES FOR ________
Pete Doherty was arrested yesterday (______ __) for ________ possession.
Police stopped the Babyshambles singer as he was driving a _______ at __.__am in London’s _______ district
Doherty was arrested on suspicion of possession ______.
There were ____ other passengers in the car who were also arrested and later bailed, reports ____.
All ____ were released from _______ police station pending analysis of “substances recovered”, a spokesman said.
Doherty was released on police bail until ______.
The singer is due in court later this month over a previous drugs sentencing.
“Ah, Grasshopper, when you can snatch the chopsticks from my hand…”
Learn how to use Chopsticks from a Japanese Chopstick Master!!!
Lesson 1: How to split apart those cheap wooden chopsticks
Lesson 2: How to eat Japanese soba noodles
Lesson 3: How to eat a McDonald’s Cheeseburger
Great, now I’m hungry. Anybody know a good noodle place around here?
I wasn’t kidding when I said that Japan is being surrounded by hostile Giant Jellyfish. Check out this pic, from Pink Tentacle‘s coverage of the invasion; suddenly it makes more sense that the Japanese would strike back, powdering the slimy buggers. Of course, it still wouldn’t occur to a sane person (nor to a person who’d seen Attack of the Mushroom People) to make that powder into cookies and put it in her mouth, but there you go; we are talking about the Japanese, after all. They may be more plausible than the Romanians, but they’re just as wingnutty under those navy suits.
You think I’m kidding? First off, it’s Japanese, which is the 21st Century’s version of Dali-esque. The entire nation seems populated by navy suit-clad, sex toy obssessed, seafood-fetishizing lunatics. Seriously, if there are sane Japanese people out there, I ain’t heard about it.
Secondly, they are made from giant, invading jellyfish.
Thirdly, they taste like it.
From Pink Tentacle:
As part of an ongoing battle against invading swarms of giant jellyfish in local waters, some residents of Fukui prefecture have developed a method for converting the jellyfish into powder, which is used to make souvenir cookies. The jellyfish treats, called “Ekura-chan saku-saku cookies,” are now on sale at JR Fukui station at a price of 580 yen for a box of 10…
The result is a cookie with a superbly textured sweetness nicely complemented by the bitter, salty flavor of jellyfish.
Simply charming. Not even in the name of research will I go near these godforsaken morsels of hellfire, not least because I know what they’re made from.
