guns don’t kill people

Guns don’t kill people

from the WOW report, which I found by doing my daily slog in the salt mines, during which I admire my manicure and listen to loud music and eat snack foods and drink refreshing beverages and get paid to read gossip blogs.

It’s a brutal job, but somebody’s got to do it.

if only I could get money out of mine…

I hear some women know the trick.

Pussy Purse This little item, from Lola’s Dashboard (via Hazel) reminds me, for no reason I can put my finger on (in polite company) of the time I was at the Bacara resort near Santa Barbara, eating the most expensive breakfast of my life ($42 plus tip) and discussing, as one does at the breakfast table, the Black Dahlia murder case. I managed to avoid the more gruesome bits (a tricky business, to say the least) and concentrate on the psycho-social aspects of the case.

“Everyone said she was dumb, but by the time she died,” I said of the then-22-year-old victim, “she’d been living off men for five years. And she was still a virgin.”

“I want to know how.”

And quick as a flash, the waitress said, “When you find out, let me know, too.”

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I have no further comment

The battle for the living room heats up

Newton. Isaac Newton.

No, Mister Bond. I expect you to turn into Daniel Craig

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some days you’re the eagle; some days you’re the deer

I’ve been about ready to go all golden eagle on somebody for a couple of days now.

 

  • My phone died.
  • My Gmail is frozen. I cannot send from my account.
  • I have 500 invitations and 1000 press releases to send out…today. And see above.
  • My blogging course announcement went out and I’ve got phone messages and emails from people who’d like to register. And see above.
  • I can’t write the press release until an author gets back to me with her bio, for which I’ve been waiting three weeks. At this point I’d be tempted to make shit up (she was raised by jackals on the African veldt…studied alchemy under Paracelsus at Tokyo Polytechnic) if indeed there existed the possibility I could send the emails in the first place, which there is not. See above.

 

On the bright side:

  • a friend promised not to commit suicide for at least two weeks, and
  • my father’s apparently haunting the CFB Borden Flying Club, so at least he’s having fun.