Category Archives: U.S.

Martin Luther King Jr. Tweets!

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Martin Luther King on Twitter

Betcha didn’t know HE was on Twitter!

Vanity Fair takes this to its logical conclusion:

At this time every year, commentators across the United States engage in an exercise I’ll call Hypothetical King, in which we try to imagine what Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. would say about the war in Afghanistan, the bank bailouts, or Mo’Nique winning best supporting actress for Precious at the Golden Globes. We extrapolate from his words and deeds and hope we’re right but can never be sure.

I’d like to engage in an exercise that’s almost the reverse of that. Instead of Hypothetical King existing in 2010, I’d like to imagine a world in which today’s tools exist in King’s day. I want to know what Dr. King would make of Twitter, the insistent social-media service that asks its users to describe “What’s happening?” in 140 characters or less.

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The Global Octopus Metaphor Through History

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This building is Octopied

First, there was Goldman Sachs:

The world’s most powerful investment bank is a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money.

According to Matt Taibbi, it’s also a Great American Bubble Machine, but when you’ve won as many awards as Taibbi, the editors don’t insist you stick to one measly metaphor.

But, as Gawker discovered, it’s not really specifically Goldman Sachs that’s the vampire squid: according to the former government of Germany it’s the Jews who are a stabby, stabby, oil-crazed octopus. Behold

the Jewcephalopod:

Jewcephalopod

Very few people actually know that “Jewcephalopod” is the root word for “Jewcy.” It’s true. It’s a FACT.

But this globe-straddling, stabby, oil-crazed, vampire cephalopod is also Standard Oil:

Standard Oil Octopus, Baby!

as well as Big Transit, Big Politics, The System, and (again) Standard Oil.

From this, I believe we can only conclude that, in fact, the Rockefellers are Jewish.

WhiteMan’sBourbon
07:03 PM

Then Hitler showed the drawing to Hirohito, and thus was born tentacle porn.

Dream of the Fisherman's Wife by Warren Holder

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The REAL Question

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marriedtothesea.com

I mean, did anyone ASK?

A Few Good Men?

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Spy you didn't read the magazine, now don't buy the book

Well, more like A Few Men/Women/Undecided/We’reNotFussyAtThisPoint.

Seems the CIA is, as they periodically are, hiring, and as a specialized and important service, they have specialized and important expectations for their applicants, and thus they are marketing themselves to specialized and important people, like the legions of newly-“retired” Wall Street Former Masters of the Universe.

That’s right; in a Perfect Storm, a maelstrom of malevolently strategic males, the CIA is recruiting investment bankers.

Gawker charts the shocking congruence. Go read it. Hamilton’s done better with this than I ever could, so check out the snippet and then go to Gawker and read the whole thing and you’re welcome.

CIA: Did cocaine with Colombians and spent all night partying with hookers in a drug lord’s villa. It was a mission.
Bankers: Did cocaine with Colombians and spent all night partying with hookers in a Murray Hill co-op. It was Tuesday.

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we have no further comment

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except that you HAVE to read the last line.

fail-owned-killer-fail