The Global Octopus Metaphor Through History

This building is Octopied

First, there was Goldman Sachs:

The world’s most powerful investment bank is a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money.

According to Matt Taibbi, it’s also a Great American Bubble Machine, but when you’ve won as many awards as Taibbi, the editors don’t insist you stick to one measly metaphor.

But, as Gawker discovered, it’s not really specifically Goldman Sachs that’s the vampire squid: according to the former government of Germany it’s the Jews who are a stabby, stabby, oil-crazed octopus. Behold

the Jewcephalopod:

Jewcephalopod

Very few people actually know that “Jewcephalopod” is the root word for “Jewcy.” It’s true. It’s a FACT.

But this globe-straddling, stabby, oil-crazed, vampire cephalopod is also Standard Oil:

Standard Oil Octopus, Baby!

as well as Big Transit, Big Politics, The System, and (again) Standard Oil.

From this, I believe we can only conclude that, in fact, the Rockefellers are Jewish.

WhiteMan’sBourbon
07:03 PM

Then Hitler showed the drawing to Hirohito, and thus was born tentacle porn.

Dream of the Fisherman's Wife by Warren Holder

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An Eight-Tentacle Salute to Octopi

Octotuba

This dude can take eight requests at a time, and refill your inkwell!

Perhaps we should set him up with this lovely Muslim octopus:

Just Call Me Habibibibibibibibi

and now, a haiku Twitter octopus joke from Chris Twitery:

knock knock knock knock knock

knock knock knock who’s there? Not that

octopus again

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The Corruption Map

Stephen Harper checks his dinner for tenderness

This is nothing more nor less than a map of the most/least corrupt countries in the world, according to Transparency International. I, personally, think they’re giving Stephen Harper too much credit (or they just don’t know which strings to pull, typically Canadian!) but it’s flattering to see Canuckistan only a blue rinse away from snowy-white purity.

I used to be snow white, but I drifted
Mae West

The Corruption Map

Competitiveness and corruption.
Image via Wikipedia

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Twitter Tips December 5th, y’all!

Calling all civilians!!!! This class is designed for beginning or early-intermediate Twitter users, to get them up to speed quickly and teach them how to get the most out of Twitter in the least amount of time.

Not like me.

and cross-posted from raincoastermedia because, well, because BECAUSE, that’s why.

Falcon

Twitter in 120 Minutes

A hands-on seminar designed for beginning Twitter users who want to learn effective ways to manage their accounts and stay efficient.

What: a two-hour introduction to Twitter and TweetDeck,

When: 12-2pm, Saturday, December 5th

Where: Tradeworks Training Society, 2nd floor, 87 West Pender Street, Vancouver at the corner of Columbia and Pender in Chinatown

Why: learn powerful applications that can save you time and help you get the most out of Twitter

How: much? $75

The basics of Twitter and the applications of two Twitter tools will be reviewed in the first 30-45 minutes with a hands-on session in the remaining 1:15, where the instructor will be available to guide participants through the basic elements of using TweetDeck and Power Twitter.

Class size is strictly limited to 8: please email bloggingclasses AT gmail DOT com to pre-register.

Payment in advance via Paypal only, please. Paypal accepts debit or credit cards as well as direct e-transfer.

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The benefits of turtleneck wearing

Well this does explain the enduring popularity of turtlenecks. I’ve always sort of wondered why someone like Pierre Trudeau was so fond of them, but then, if you were married to this…

Margaret Trudeau, yo

Well, wouldn’t you prefer this?

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