in Ukraine, tech supports…the revolution!
Still, you KNOW someone out there is bitching about tech support being slow. You just know it.
Tech Support Response o’ the Day: Molotov Cocktails for Two Edition
Snow Doge saves Jamaican Bobsled Team
Snow Doge very feels
I’d better get started on a screenplay, because this is the most perfect straight-to-the-big-screen story I’ve heard in simply ages.
The Dogecoin Foundation, an actual charitable foundation based around a satirical cryptocurrency named after an actual dog meme, yes, really, has come to the rescue of the actual Jamaican Bobsled Team, who are actually going to be in the Olympics again.
IF they can ever get there.
The Jamaican Bobsled Team, who are actually called The Jamaican Bobsleigh Team because, I dunno, it’s cuter? have qualified to compete in the Sochi Winter Olympics that start next month in Russia. They are the team made famous by the John Candy movie Cool Runnings, the fictionalized story of how they made it to their first Olympics, back in 1988.
Money has always been as scarce with the team as snow in Jamaica, but this time it’s the Interwebs to the Rescue!
A Crowdtilt fundraiser has gathered more than $20,000 towards the costs of competition (travel, support for families back home, etc) and now the internet’s favorite Shiba Inu gallops in with a shocking $30,778 raised in just 24 hours.
The name of their fundraising site? Dogesled.
Of course.
Snow Doge says: very funds. So Olympics. Wow.
Party On, Rude!
And fuck your manscaper too!
spend more time on your eyebrows bro
fuck you too
Those are the immortal words of the unnamed shutterbug behind my new favorite Tumblr, “FuckYouPartyPhotographer.”
In an effort to appear badass, and perhaps attempting to top their appearance on DouchebagsLoveGreyGoose, douches and douchettes all over the Vangroover club scene are begging someone to take their picture, only to flip them off when they do.
Yes, I said “Vangroover.” Never was a more perfect coinage minted, for that is where these people live: a strange, ill-lit land where everyone is desperate to give the impression they’re not actually from Surrey.
White Rock means never having to say you’re Surrey, Simba
Now, one man is striking back. One man, alone, armed with nothing more than an apparently eye-catching and high-quality photo rig, and a permanent place on the VIP list. And it is glorious.
Fuck you, Combover Boy
FUCK YOU TOO
who are you, Prince William, duke of assholes ;)
If you go out clubbing in this city and fly the colours for the party photographer, and the colours read “Fuck You,” you can be pretty sure that, sooner or later, you will end up on this Tumblr, and NO, he will not take it down.
What are you gonna do, swear at him?
PS I’m pretty sure that on a lot of those tongues flapped out, Miley-style, that bump isn’t a tongue stud, it’s HPV.
FBI LulzSec Files
Been waiting for this. Will I have time to write it tomorrow? Not sure.
Merry Christmas, Happy Boxing Day, and Happy Birthday to Shane McGowan
Slightly belated, but only by a couple of hours.
GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS GUYS!
That’s right, it’s Shane McGowan‘s birthday! Or was, until a couple of hours ago. Yeah, Jesus is dead and Shane McGowan is alive; whodathunkit?
Normally we have a tradition of posting the Fairytale of New York, but for some reason I’m just not feeling it this year. Had the Christmas spirit going pretty well up until Christmas itself, whereupon I decided I needed to kill something. I killed the mood instead of a bystander by going for a two hour walk with my cousin, where we found a nice little sailboat, about 25 feet of sailboat, washed up on the rocks at English Bay.
A real, live shipwreck for Christmas!
Which brings us to today’s story. Normally we have a tradition of posting A Christmas Story by Sarban (NOT the one with the Red Ryder BB Gun) but in honour of whoever is having a worse Christmas than me because they got shipwrecked on a night when all the hotels are booked and everything is closed, I’ll link instead to the truly spine-chilling “Christmas Eve on a Haunted Hulk.” Enjoy?
If that doesn’t float your boat, here’s a slick and enjoyable remix of Vince Guaraldi’s Charlie Brown Christmas, in mellow hip-hop style, via Doc Rocket on Facebook.
