Category Archives: 80’s

Osama Bin Laden parties with pagans in the Eighties

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George Clooney then and now

Well, who doesn’t have a few embarrassing party pix or yearbook photos from the Eighties, eh? Why should Osama Bin Laden, who rocked the bell bottoms and turtleneck look as hard as anyone in the Seventies, escape this universal fate?

Turns out that during the Eighties he was living with the Kalasha tribesmen of the Chitral region of Pakistan, a strangely timeless Asiatic tribe documented by Wilfred Thesiger.

Chitral is also the home of the Kalasha, a unique pagan civilization that’s lived in the area for 2,000 years or more, now boxed in by an increasingly militant Islam. Thinly populated, Chitral covers 5,800 square miles, with war-torn Afghanistan to the north and west and the extremist strongholds of Swat and Dir to the south.

According to locals, bin Laden lived with a Kalasha family in Chitral for some time during his first Afghan jihad, against the Soviet Union in the 1980s. With his now much more severe ideology, the al Qaida leader wouldn’t be able to easily live among these polytheistic people, whose men and women mix freely…

Kalasha women also don’t cover, so was OBL covering his eyes the entire time? I doubt that.
And now he wants to fight polytheists? Osama Bin Laden: demeaning Islam in leaps in and bounds.

Hey, old habits die hard. I mean; did you SEE him in that turtleneck?

quiz: which gay childhood icon are you?

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I’m kind of bummed I didn’t get Peppermint Patty, but then without baseball questions how could you? Still, Daphne is a dip; Velma could do much better any night at Lick.


You Are the Very Gay Velma!


She might not even realize it…

But Velma is all about Daphne… not Fred!

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Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull trailer

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You must contain yourself when watching this video, which I stole from Gawker, but only up to the point at which you see the shadow of the fedora. At that point, you may begin screaming uncontrollably or muttering “drat that Jones! I’ll foil him yet,” as you prefer. Behold the greatness which is Doctor Henry Jones, Junior

Did I mention I still have that hat, the coolest in all creation, which I bought on the last day Woodwards was open? Yes, an official Indiana Jones hat from Stetson, I think it was, though the original was Herbie Jones, which I of course and naturally cannot afford; the information printed inside has long since been worn away and the hat has become battered, faded and stained in propa Indy manner. It was once splashed by an Orca on the rocks near Not-Ucluelet. This is what you call adventure cred, my friends. My hat has more than most actual people.

Indiana Jones hat, the real thing

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a writer’s life: it’s not all skittles and beer

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Sometimes it’s vengeful dames and whiskey sours. Welcome to my world:

Stolen from Gawker, which is quite the Kids in the Hall fanclub this weekend.

PS: Kids in the Hall were formed in 1984. Oh, GOD I’m old.

Proof the Recession is Real

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Everyone is talking about this Recession, saying that all the numbers are in and it’s a sure thing. Yet, I see no breadlines, hear no word of Wall Street defenestrations (must! pray! harder!). But today proof has emerged that the dreaded Recession, with its associated Stagflation (which sounds like a half-boner at a Bachelor Party) and other related, undead terms rising from the grave of the Seventies, has returned to haunt us like the ghost of Sonny Bono.

What dismal form has this proof taken? Nothing less than a video showing that the noxious poison of the economic downturn has the very GODS in its gory paws.

Cthulhu layoffs.