Category Archives: Etiquette

Donnie Davies performs God Hates a Fag: the infamous video

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Yes doubters, it’s the real thing! Now that every single one of the Right Reverend Donnie Davies‘ websites has had the plug pulled on it, the entire Internet, apparently, experiencing the online equivalent of a Coyote Morning, the banned video is hotter than Helmand heroin. 

Naturally from the very first we at the ol’ raincoaster blog have been on this like santorum on a rentboy. The video file was lovingly ripped at great pain and uncountable expense from a ripped copy of a ripped copy of a MySpace video which had been smuggled out of Celebrities in the bottom of a converted Boblbee, and God, who hates a fag by the way, only knows what the quality is like on this poor bugger. Sod’s law.

Yes, people, it is a joke. You may climb down from the ceiling now.

Latest UPDATE HERE: what MTV doesn’t want you to see!

Lyrics over the hump…I mean JUMP!
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quiz: which French stereotype are you?

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Zees queez fhrom Jhoovaynal, eet ees ab-seurd! Aye aym newt a hway-teur!
I AM THE SNOOTY WAITER! Which French Stereotype Are You?
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fart-proof panties

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Fartypants, yoAlso excellent for birth control, as anyone who sees that you wear these horrific remedial incontinent-Grandma pants will cut (out) like the wind.

The Under-Ease pants have an in-built multi-layered, replaceable filter made of felt, charcoal and fibreglass wool.

Having recently returned from the Valley of the Shadow of Conservatism, I must take a moment to note for posterity that, no matter what the level of fine or otherwise dining one may be enjoying there, the main course is always accompanied by a hearty serving of boiled, frozen broccoli and cauliflower. Always. I believe this to be a subtle yet effective adaptation to the climate; a clever way of ensuring that Ontarians do not freeze in their sleep, as their beds will be cosily heated for hours from the pre-heated gaseous emissions resulting from the breakdown of said side-dish cruciferousness. Cruciferocity. Whatever; it’s nothing to do with Catholicism. There is obviously no market for these pants in Ontario, regardless of the religious demographics.

I’m wondering if, after a certain point of flatulence and resultant inflatuation while wearing these pants, one achieves the ability to fly, Hindenburg-style? I can just see currently-sexagenarian Richard Branson snarfing down some quick Taco Bell and attempting to set a new record for underwear-powered flight. And, of course, if this method of transportation catches on it could revolutionize the car and aerospace industries as well as meaningfully reduce global warming and cause the entire tax system to be re-evaluated. I forsee a boom in the legume and dried turkish apricot markets very soon.

Buy low, sell high.
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the faces of terror

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According to the Americans, this is what a terrorist looks like:

maher arar

and like this

Pretty hot for a terrorist, eh?

and like this

tiny toddling terrorist?

Well, you may say, better safe than sorry. After all, we don’t know what the kid had in her diaper, and the first two are kinda swarthy-lookin’.

And yes, fair enough, they do look kinda tan for, respectively, a Canadian and a Swede, but since Maher Arar was cleared of terrorism charges and released after spending two years of torture in a Syrian prison(Syria being the US’s favorite offshore torture facility), and since Prince Carl Philip of Sweden is in line for the throne of a major European monarchy, besides being a total hottie, to keep Arar on the no-fly list and to arrest and detain HRH CP in jail overnight for using his diplomatic passport and looking insufficiently regal seems a tad…well, overzealous.

Whereas we have no sympathy whatsoever for the three year old girl who threw a screaming tantrum while her flight was boarding, and who was thrown off the plane and banned along with her parents for “attacking a woman” (who happened to be her mother). If empowered to do so, I myself would unhesitatingly throw off a plane anyone I felt looked like they could at some point in the flight become flatulent, hog the armrest, throw a screaming fit, attack someone, discuss real estate or smokers’ rights, or chew with their mouths open. And I wouldn’t wait for the bloody plane to land, either. Softies!

So, with passport requirements stiffening, even for US citizens trying to re-enter their own country — don’t misplace yours. If it can happen to Swedish royalty, it can happen to anyone.

Well, OK, there is one difference between royalty and us little guys in this situation…

“I got the impression that he thought it was quite exciting,” said documentary film maker Folke Rydén, who was traveling with the Prince as part of the filming project.

Special bonus British terrorist:

Yeah, he just looks like trouble. It's the eyes...you can see it in his eyes

Jay Cowper, the tiny terrorist, the huggable hoodie.

The shop, which serves the well-to-do Huntington area of York, is only a five-minute walk from the family home but it was a cold and windy night so Jay was wrapped up in a brown Next jacket with a furry hood.

Mrs Cowper said: “No sooner had they got inside than the shopkeeper said to my husband, ‘Could you ask the little boy to remove his hood?’

“My husband said, ‘He’s only two and a half, I don’t think he’s going to rob you!’“

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it’s No Name-Calling Week, mofos!

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Poetic Insult, you maroonz! 

Indeed, in the topsy-turvey, through-the-looking-glass world which is New Jersey, it has been officially declared No Name-Calling Week.

Naturally, this set us to thinking, here at the ol’ raincoaster blog. It set us to thinking that this was a concept upon which we could improve. It, along with this post from TAN, well really it, the post from TAN, this post from Lori, and the proven fact that insults, ire, and sheer poopyheadedness generate more comments than reason or normalcy, set us to thinking that we could have some fun with the comments section this week.

It’s Name-Calling Week, fuckerz!

Do your best. Comments which do not include at least one name-calling incident and which aren’t of sufficient mind-boggling stone cold merit to earn a pass from me will have a point deleted from the commenter’s score. All commenters start with zero points, and you earn one for each insult. I, as the Price Waterhouse Cooper of the contest, am exempt and so, for obvious reasons, are serious comment threads.

May the worst mouth win.

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