Normally, Cthulhu and his family are charming hosts, but sometimes Junior gets into the nước mắm and the next thing you know the tentacles are flying! It’s hard enough making small talk when only half the guests are amphibious.
Cthulhu visits the Victorians en route to His voracious victory!
“How about them uppity natives, eh? Oh, I hear ya! I totally feel your pain, dude.”
The guest list included only the highest social stratum. Here’s this year’s hot couple posing happily just moments before the melee broke out.
The Whaleses
I always thought he could do better, myself. I tried introducing him to some of those delightful Marsh women and their cousin, that Munn woman, but it was a no-go. And why? The girl is clearly talented.
Olivia Munn be desperate
and desperate. But then, many of us remember the last big family party, when she and her cousin Ralsa broke up the dance floor back in ’08.
Click over the jump for a roundup of the other Cthelebrity guests. Get your partying in now, people. Remember, the Crapture is coming!
Long have we shouted into the insatiable, oblivious void, warning of the dangers of those tiny, trembling, fanged and clawed homunculi known as Chihuahuas. And have you listened? Hellz no you have not; you persist in toting these hideous, incontinent fetal aliens in handbags and amusingly-McMansion-shaped wheelie bins everywhere you go.
[aside: while I was writing this, Zemanta came up with some Related Articles and they included something I could have sworn said “cooking and features of a Blue Chihuahua” but alas it was “coloring” instead. Imagine my disappointment. Also, capitalizing adjectives and nouns? Isn’t that German? Are these loathesome creatures the spawn of some unthinkable Nazi experiment? It would explain a lot, that’s all I’m saying. Also, apparently cooking Chihuahuas is A Thing:
CORRECTION: The first ingredient in the 4/30 Quesadillas recipe should have read “1 cup shredded Mexican Cheddar, Monterey Jack, Pepper Jack, or brick cheese.” Somehow, an auto spell-check changed cheddar to Chihuahua. We apologize for the error and hope that no Chihuahuas were harmed due to the error.
] yes I had to end the […] because I’m meticulous like that.
But now we have reports, many reports, coming in. You will not listen to reason, but might you listen to evidence? Just maybe?
From the comments on Gawker:
Good Girl Gone Bad @raincoaster
Actually scientists did some DNA analysis that showed chihuahuas are descended from an entirely different type of canine than all of the other breeds of dogs. They can interbreed with other breeds of dogs only because most species of canine can interbreed (like wolves and dogs(
So actually you are right
P.S. I have a supercrush on you.
Obviously a person of vast intelligence and exquisite taste. This was in the comments added to an article about how a thief stole it out of a car along with a laptop but returned the Naked Mole Rat “Dog” in the back seat, because even criminals deserve better company.
CHIHUAHUAS and pomeranians are on the list of Queenland”s 100 most menacing dogs.
They might stand less than 30cm tall, but the small pets have now officially been declared menacing creatures by authorities, under controversial new state laws aimed at slowing the state’s rising number of dog attacks.
More than a year after the laws were introduced, only 110 dogs have been declared menacing in Queensland, but authorities predict that will soar as awareness of the new laws spreads.
Shelter workers at an SPCA on B.C.’s Sunshine Coast have taken an injured poodle under their wing after the canine was dropped onto the grounds of a care home by a large bird of prey.
The six-year-old poodle, dubbed “Miracle May” by workers, fell from the sky onto the Shorncliff Nursing Home in Sechelt on May 2.
Deep One by Christopher Burdett: although in conversation she could be quite shallow
Shocking video evidence of the survival of a colony of Dagon-worshipping Deep Ones just off Leblon Beach, Rio de Janeiro. Also shocking video evidence not all Brazilians look good in a bikini.
And YES I know we’ve been all about the videos lately, but what can I say? YouTube has been particularly awesome lately, what with dead squirrels, Yellowknifers, and gravity-bedevilled gilled monstrosities of the deep.
Yellowknife outdoor art actually better than most in Vangroover
I’m learning so much about my soon-to-be-adopted home. Here are some wonderfully informative (original typo: “deformative”) videos about being a newcomer to the land of permafrost and muskeg.
“Hi. I’m new here.”
“I’ve decided to stay. Now what?”
NOTED!
Interestingly, the guy in these videos looks not unlike my new boss. Coincidence? Well, if I can hack it in Wiarton, I figure I can hack it in Yellowknife.
Oh, when I was up there I heard a lot of sirens. Being from the DTES I thought nothing of it, but was later informed there are only seven siren-bearing vehicles in the town. They must all have been busy that day.
raincoaster 