Om mom mom mom

I’m reposting this from my parenting blog, for lo, I am way jaded and rare indeed is the story that makes me yell OH MY FUCKING GOD, but this?

This. Is. That. Story.

doesn't that look mouth-watering?

Verily, the record of history is thick with wacky diets (and someday I hope to stumble across The Drinking Woman’s Diet) and among them there are some real lollapalosers of recipes, including the Cabbage Soup Diet (how do you sell 300 pages of “put cabbage in water, cook it, and drink it”?) not to mention oddities like Slug Fritters and their ick ilk. There’s even a sub-group of cannibal-chic dishes like Hufu, human-flavoured tofu, and ClooFu, the George Clooney-flavoured tofu. And anyone who knows what a doula is has heard about the miraculous, all-natural benefits of eating one’s placenta, just like animals which haven’t learned to read, write, walk on their hind legs or exercise bowel control.

placentawichNow the world offers a queasy welcome to: placentawiches.

That’s right, folks.  Master chefs Chrissy and Kathy Schilling used the placenta from Chrissy’s newborn to spice up pasta, panini and other delicious meals over the weekend — and generously posted pictures of the afterbirth-filled dishes on their Facebook page.

Although doctors claim placenta offers no nutritional benefit for people who already are well-nourished, the sisters believe otherwise.

Among the benefits reported by the self-cannibalizing new mother, hallucinogenic effects must rank as the only one which interests me, but one which, in the current War Against Drugs political climate, we must ignore, lest pregnant women everywhere be shipped off to Gitmo for the proactive protection of American slackers.

Let’s raise a toast to free-range mothers-to-be!

Placenta Cocktail

Ingredients:

1/4 cup fresh, raw placenta
8oz V-8 juice
2 ice cubes
1/2 cup carrot

Method: blend at high speed for 10 seconds. Serve. A tasty thirst quencher!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need a stiff drink.

add to del.icio.us : Add to Blinkslist : add to furl : Digg it : add to ma.gnolia : Stumble It! : add to simpy : seed the vine : : : TailRank : post to facebook

Did Shirley Temple Start This Way?

reposted from TeenyManolo, because I’m lazy

Attention, stage parents everywhere! Your sprog has yet another chance to make up for your own inadequacies by prancing in front of uncaring ad executives for an opportunity to enter the glamorous world of professional entertainment:

The Potty Dance

Details on the soul-crushing, future-adolescence-blighting contest here. Via MomFuse.

Internet Safety 101

He lurks everywhere!

Cthulhu lurks everywhere!

via Carocat

Little Gordon Ramsay

Awwwww, isn’t Little Gordon here adorable? A chip off the old blockhead! If Cthulhu and I ever had a love/hatefuck child, he’d turn out just like this, I’m sure.

You can watch all three videos over at TeenyManolo, yo.

Comme J’ai Mal by Mylene Farmer

Given the transition of Faceless Day into a new face for raincoaster, this seems like a good time to introduce this video by Franco-Canuck Mylene Farmer. It’s the first song that made me aware of her, and it only did that because of the awesome power of this particular video, which just happens to be near-perfect.

Sorry, my French is a bit rusty, but I think you get the gist.