Category Archives: Literary

he’s back!

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TomlinsonSpeaking of zombies, Richard Tomlinson is back online here. The man will not lay down and die; this re-emergence was expected, but frankly I wondered if he was in custody, given that things had seemed to be heading towards a peaceful settlement and then BOOM!

Tomlinson Blog 101 here; Tomlinson Blog Disappeared 101 here.

I was wrong with my guess on the specific TOS violation: Typepad said the Metropolitan Police (who have no juristiction over a blog written in France and hosted in the US) sent a letter of complaint, referencing 4(3) of the TOS, and that they, Typepad, had no choice but to take it down. So all they require is a letter of complaint; no proof, no warrant, no lucid argument, not even an old school tie with the IT department; just a letter of complaint.

For god’s sake don’t tell the creationists about this!

And yeah, he could not be said to be taking this well:

So the Metropolitan Police asked Typepad to suspend my account, and Typepad suspend my account without any warning or explanation, and without offering me any form of appeal. Sounds like they work to the same sort of morale code as MI6!

I have asked Typepad for a refund of my subscription fee, and for a copy of my files, but they have not yet offered this. Luckily one kind reader of my old site had downloaded a mirror, and so you can access all the pages here: http://richardtomlinson.6x.to/

I suggest that any readers who use Typepad as their blog host consider moving their site elsewhere, as it is clear that Typepad is not a robust or secure service.

I thought it was only in China and Iran that the secret police shut down blogs, but it seems that even in America this happens too…

And the specific TOS referenced in the complaint is:

4 PAYMENT TERMS

(3) CANCELLATION AND TERMINATION

If you cancel the Service before the end of the term, your cancellation will take effect immediately. After cancellation, you will no longer have access to your website and all information contained therein may be deleted by Six Apart. Six Apart accepts no liability for such deleted information or content. If you are a Guest, the Account Holder who invites you may request Six Apart to, and Six Apart may, terminate your Service at any time and for any reason. If your credit card is invalid for any reason, the Service may be cancelled and all the information contained within deleted permanently. Six Apart accepts no liability for information that is deleted due to an invalid credit card.

You agree Six Apart, in its sole discretion, may terminate your password, and/or account, and remove and discard any Content within the Service (including, but not limited to your Blog Site if you are an Account Holder), for any reason, including and without limitation, the lack of use, or if Six Apart believes that you have violated or acted inconsistently with the letter or spirit of the TOS. Any contracts, verbal or written or assumed, in conjunction with your deleted Blog Site (as applicable) and all its parts, at Six Apart’s discretion, will be terminated as well. Six Apart may also in its sole discretion and at any time, discontinue providing the Service, or any part thereof, with or without notice. You agree that any termination of your access to the Service under any provision of this TOS may be effected without prior notice, and acknowledge and agree that Six Apart may immediately deactivate or delete your Blog Site, as applicable, and all related information and files. Six Apart reserves the right to bar any further access to such files or the Service. You agree that Six Apart shall not be liable to you or any third-party for any termination of your access to the Service. Paid accounts that are terminated will not be refunded.

Heather has two mommy-caverns

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Surf Safe!Well, it might not be Heather herself; it might not even be any Heather per se.

But this woman had better get a discount on tampons.

There have to be some consolations for going through life with two hoo-haws.

I lost my virginity twice. The first time was when I was eighteen. Then I lost the other side two weeks later. To the same guy. Flowertwat...there's a use for them.

You’d think I could have saved one of them for marriage.

From Esquire, (via Gawker) who really know how to give men what they want. So much for those gay rumours!

Ladyflower

letter o’ the day: Guido’s new jobhunting technique

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Labour...blogging...and of course, no pay. I thought these socialists looked after their people?Hmmm, we’ll see if this works. I actually managed to get fired by someone I had serious blackmail material on…but of course, I shoulda had it on my computer, and not hers. D’oh! I shall be watching this with much interest. Of course, if it actually paid, I’d be applying myself, but I’m done with these “great exposure” jobs. If I want to expose myself, I doubt not that I could find an audience. Which brings us full circle; after all, I still think Tony Blair’s a sexy bitch.

There was Guido thinking that Recess Monkey was the official Labour party blogger, apparently not, since the Labour party is running a competition to find the official blogger for their conference. First prize is free access to the conference. That is a prize? What does the loser get?

“You’ll be given access to all the key speeches and events at Conference and you’ll be blogging from the floor about your experiences.” Guido might even get to meet Prezza!

To enter, all you need to do is email blogatconferenceatnewdotlabourdotorgdotuk detailing your:
* name* address* phone number* blog URL
* and 100 words on why you should be our Conference blogger.

We will pick the best, the most innovative and the freshest entry before announcing the winner on Friday 8 September. So good luck and send us a blog!

To: Guido sez hiblogatconferenceatnewdotlabourdotorgdotuk
From : guidodotfawkesatorder-orderdotcom

Dear Labour Blog Competition,

I would like to be the official Labour party blogger for a laugh.

If you don‘t pick me I will publish a picture of a government minister breaking the law this weekend. Your call.

 Regards,

Guido

100 greatest novels of all time

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Or so they claim. No Euripedes? No Ovid? The Guardian editors have much to answer for. For much the Guardian editors have to answer.

Whatever.

So these Boetians walk into a bar

Here‘s the list, each one with a handy-dandy link to buying it on Amazon, even the ones that have been online at Gutenberg for years.

The case for the defence. Don’t like the list? Post your own suggestions for the 100 best books on the Observer blog.

1. Don Quixote Miguel De Cervantes
The story of the gentle knight and his servant Sancho Panza has entranced readers for centuries.

2. Pilgrim’s Progress John Bunyan
The one with the Slough of Despond and Vanity Fair. 

3. Robinson Crusoe Daniel Defoe
The first English novel.

4. Gulliver’s Travels Jonathan Swift
A wonderful satire that still works for all ages, despite the savagery of Swift’s vision.

5. Tom Jones Henry Fielding
The adventures of a high-spirited orphan boy: an unbeatable plot and a lot of sex ending in a blissful marriage.

6. Clarissa Samuel Richardson
One of the longest novels in the English language, but unputdownable.

7. Tristram Shandy Laurence Sterne
One of the first bestsellers, dismissed by Dr Johnson as too fashionable for its own good.

8. Dangerous Liaisons Pierre Choderlos De Laclos
An epistolary novel and a handbook for seducers: foppish, French, and ferocious.

9. Emma Jane Austen
Near impossible choice between this and Pride and Prejudice. But Emma never fails to fascinate and annoy.

10. Frankenstein Mary Shelley
Inspired by spending too much time with Shelley and Byron.
Buy Frankenstein at Amazon.co.uk

…

Who did we miss?

So, are you congratulating yourself on having read everything on our list or screwing the newspaper up into a ball and aiming it at the nearest bin?

Are you wondering what happened to all those American writers from Bret Easton Ellis to Jeffrey Eugenides, from Jonathan Franzen to Cormac McCarthy?

Have women been short-changed? Should we have included Pat Barker, Elizabeth Bowen, A.S. Byatt, Penelope Fitzgerald, Doris Lessing and Iris Murdoch?

What’s happened to novels in translation such as Bulgakov’s The Master and Margarita, Hesse’s Siddhartha, Mishima’s The Sea of Fertility, Süskind’s Perfume and Zola’s Germinal?

Writers such as J.G. Ballard, Julian Barnes, Anthony Burgess, Bruce Chatwin, Robertson Davies, John Fowles, Nick Hornby, Russell Hoban, Somerset Maugham and V.S. Pritchett narrowly missed the final hundred. Were we wrong to lose them?

Let us know what you think. Post your own suggestions for the 100 best books on the Observer blog.

article o’ the day: Israel and the art of sophistry

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John McCarthy, yoFrom John McCarthy in the Independent, which I really should read more often. Why in god’s name the home page is made to look as trashy as it is, is a mystery. If it didn’t look so US Weekly, I might actually read the damn thing.

I was pointed to the article over on the BoJo flamewar by Wobbly. And you thought they were extinct, didn’t you?

In any case, there is an interesting amount of debate going on in the press, and this is an article I keep coming back to. Well worth reading, if only for the information that Israel kidnapped two Palestinians the day before the kidnapping of Corporal Shalit, the official excuse for the current war.

In Tony Blair‘s speech in Los Angeles last Tuesday, he said he was sickened by what was happening in Lebanon but went on to effectively absolve Israel of responsibility for the devastation there. He urged: “Just for a moment, put yourself in Israel’s place.”

In that one phrase, our Prime Minister summed up everything that is wrong with our policy for the Middle East.

And before you accuse the author of mindless anti-Semitism and knee-jerk pro-Palestinianism, check the bio notes:

John McCarthy was kidnapped in Lebanon in 1986 and held for five years

John McCarthy makes the cover of Time