We here at the ol’ raincoaster blog have recently and painstakingly conducted a customer satisfaction survey among a representative focus group of our readers. Thanks to the participants’ enthusiastic responses, we are now able to bring you programming tailored to your specific needs.

But we’re not going to. We’re going to talk about Squid.

The redoubtable (whatever that means, but it sounds positive and not at all ambivalent, which you would think it would be, if you scanned it too closely) Envelope Filter has come up with something better than a quiz; something better than a random, computer-generated Delphic Oracle, forever providing inappropriate answers to simple questions such as “what is my totem Japanese emoticon?” or “what kind of fairy princess am I, you fucktard?”

announcing:

The Tentacle Pornstar Name Challenge

If you were starring in a tentacle porn flick, what would your name be?

This is far too hilarious to not have a go at!

It has occurred to me that the possibility of crossing Lovecraft references with Porn with Japanese with The Internet might create some kind of geek singularity from which there is no escape, or create a black hole, or worse yet some kind of meme, but those are risks I’m willing to take.

Seriously – I need the entertainment that much this week. Don’t let me down people!

Responses to the comments! Winner gets pimped by an insignificant blog! How can you resist!?!

And in case you were wondering? My entry: Tentacool McJiggler!!

In the name of science, do chicks dig gills? I’ve got to mac me a shorty that digs that!

Put your tentacle porn name in the comments on his site; entries here won’t count, as I have not even imaginary prizes to hand out.

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