I HAVE to try this. I wonder if I could get the bus all to myself with this.
“Just throw him The Face for awhile!”
Now, on the off chance that you’re short of inspiration for The Face, you can click over the jump and read all of today’s most skeeve-inducing gossip links.
Yep, that’s pretty much what you’ve got here: a crazy old dude going crazy to Led Zeppelin. THIS MAN FOR PRIME MINISTER!!!
Also: Markham??? Is this man related to me???
UPDATE: This video has been removed for violating YouTube’s Terms of Service eh? FUCK YOUTUBE. Vimeo, take me away!
If only my parents had bought me this when I was little!
Okay so judging by the computer clock I have 12.5 minutes to finish this post and get it up, which may give you a hint why most of my posts seem rather … thin … lately. I have to jam them all up before the web cafe closes or walk several miles in the rain to get to the nearest 24 hour cafe and then pay another $2 for lousy coffee or $5 in the case of the nearest cafe, which has a two-drink minimum and NO I AM NOT EVEN JOKING so is it any wonder I’m having an emo breakdown? It’s only Monday by a few minutes and I’m already three days behind in posts.
So let me tell you about the time I had an emo meltdown on my one and only celebrity follower. Well, I have some celebrity journalists following me, thank god, because validation from writers better than one’s self is always welcome, but I have only one Actual Movie Star Follower, and that’s John Cusack. I’d tell you about him, but I don’t have time and you DO have google, so knock yourselves out.
It happened after I’d stayed up too long liveblogging Japan (for which I did get on the front page of Google for “Japanese Earthquake” for a time at least; I do think I did a good job, but GOD who can blog that for long without going ever so slightly insane, eh? I ask yez) two nights in a row and gotten an email from a friend in Hawaii mentioning the two quakes he’d had while he was replying to my email of a few minutes ago. Oh, swell.
Then I heard about the reactors.
That’s about when I DM’d my one and only Genuine Celebrity Follower, a man I know through conversations of about 420 characters total. And nothing is to be deduced from that purely coincidental number.
And what did I say to this near-stranger? “Do you ever have one of those days when you think the end of the world is actually here already?”
So, yeah, I’m apparently That Fan. Mother would be so proud.
On that note, here are your emo links for an early Monday morning. I should drink more, at least I’m a happy drunk.
Internet Love never works out. Lavalife has a lot to answer for.
Haven’t we all had that experience? The tall, handsome, male charmer online somehow morphs, in between tweeting and meeting, into a stubby, Faces-of-Meth, hermaphroditic, spectrum disorder-having bedwetter. Oh, there may be plenty of fish out there, but YOU try getting one to make conversation over a nice entree.
The Booty Call of Cthulhu
Kate Gosselin will settle for just ANYONE.
Anybody need a stiff drink after that? Apparently I need a Bloody Mary:
You Are a Bloody Mary |
 You’re a fairly serious drinker who’s experimented a lot with different drinks. You know what you like to drink, but you’re not a snob. You’ll drink anything in a pinch. You’re a drunk, but you are a stable drunk. You don’t ever let your drinking get out of control.You’re the one who keeps everyone levelheaded, even if you’ve had the most to drink. |
If you don’t feel like a drink but have been inspired to take quite a different kind of action, here’s the “what kind of toilet user are you” quiz that you didn’t know you were waiting for.
Your Toilet Personality is Social |
 You’ll go anywhere, anytime, with anyone. In fact, you secretly talk on the phone when you’re in your “office.” For you, going to the bathroom is no big deal. And you going shouldn’t be for anyone else either. You don’t mind public restrooms – in fact, you sort of like the energy they bring to the act.When you’re on the toilet, you consider yourself a bit of a performance artist. |
As always, your mileage may vary. And so via natural progression to the celebrity gossip links for today.
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Can I get "Bohemian Rhapsody?"
Stop me if you’ve heard this one: no, don’t. Click Play anyway, because this is worth a re-listen or ten. Three Irish university students on temporary loan to Ireland perform the Flight of the Bumblebee on an instrument consisting of their entire apartment and some partly-empty beer bottles.
Now that the mood’s been set, get yourself a refreshing “musical instrument” (meat whistle optional) and click over the jump to get today’s juicy gossip links.
raincoaster 