Well, my first choice for Jew Demonstrating Jewish Walking is a washout, alas, but it did turn me on to one of the greatest websites of all time: JewOrNotJew!
Note red carpet, velvet ropes, and soundtrack. Hmmm, is Kanye Jewish too?
Oh, and in reference to the title, if you want to know if Viggo‘s circumsized, you can get The Indian Runner, which has several seconds of full-frontal Viggo. Some frames of which have been moderately photoshopped.
Viggo with muppets by Michaelangelo okay not really.
The Greedy Eagle Casino Grand Opening by IndigFlygirl
We at the ol’ raincoaster blog salute our First Nations brothers and sisters of the West Village Band of Zuccotti Indians as they proudly reclaim their ancestral territory.
And promptly put a casino on it.
“Hit me!”
“No, that comes later.”
This may be the funniest, least PC thing I’ve ever posted. Should be good for at least one flamewar with some White Liberal Guilt-Having Vegan. Hey, don’t blame me, blame the 1491’s! Blaming the Natives: we should have perfected it by now!
First up, Judy Vitale from ReadTheStars. I kind of adore Judy; she’s that slightly loony aunt who makes family reunions tolerable by getting into the Chardonnay and telling people Things They Don’t Want To Hear all night long. Through the crack in the bathroom door if need be.
According to Judy, our boy has a problem. He’s got no fire. He’s all Earth and Water and of course to anyone familiar with the muck he’s neck-deep in right now, this makes total sense. His Uranus (Hisanus?) is squared, poor boy; they can fix that with surgery nowadays. In response to his elemental blockage, he’s compelled to seek out Fire in other people. May I make a suggestion? You can ask AngelNeptuneStar, I’m generally both surrounded by fire, friendly or not, and exuding it myself. Heck, you can ask Albania. Or this NYCTarotReader with whom we spoke earlier.
Does Julian Assange have that much influence? In his head, apparently yes. If Mr. Assange had spoken to an astrologer, though he would have found that he is in danger of making presumptuous, inflated and grandiose statements at this point in time, as Jupiter comes through to affect the positions of Uranus and the sun at the time of his birth. Jupiter has an inflationary effect. Yes, it can mean luck and exposure, and it can also signify braggadocio and over-confidence to the point of arrogance. In his case, and in anyone’s for that matter, the last thing an over-pumped Uranus needs is a killer dose of steroids! No matter your opinion of Assange or how accurate his self-assessment might be, it’s patently obvious he is a disruptive, revolutionary, and some say, innovative force. This is the energy of Uranus.
Myanus isn’t nearly that energetic, actually. And I really don’t WANT to know how Jupiter Juice got all over it, I just want him to clean up after himself.
Turning now to the exotic East, that is, the Downtown Eastside, we have a community doctor who also happens to know a thing or two about Chinese Horoscopes, and here is that report, fresh off the Twitter wire:
The timing of this blog post was impeccable. Upon further investigation, (because sadly I have nothing else to do) Julian Assange was actually born in the month of the Rat (albeit a Wooden Rat.) The year, however was a Metal Pig… so Astrologically somewhat close.
Not to be outdone by a woman with a moon and star blanket…
Admittedly, I don’t know anything about Uranus, but from a Chinese Astrological perspective and not knowing what time he was born, here’s my take.
Yes, Assange does not have any fire easily seen in his Chinese chart, however I would characterize his as more of a Water/Earth issue. He is an earth person with a strong Water team dominating his chart. Earth is supposed to block water but his is yin earth (Earth Ox) immediately beside a yang wood element (Wood Rat) – the image of a tree with it’s roots penetrating into soft soil comes to mind. The water element governs communications. Perhaps his innate inability to block all that water makes him a bit – shall we say, “Wiki-leaky?”
Contrarian me would suggest that it might mean he’s blocking the wiki-leaks instead?
Most candidate profiles are just resumés and vague promises.
But I? As finance director of Sublime Conception and as a Supervillain, I offer you a Bold New Vancouver with shocking changes like 1. affordable housing, 2. accessible transportation and… 3. livability!
Let’s end the NPA/Vision housing bubble! Squatters will occupy idle buildings! Taxes on non-resident owners and property flippers will finance mixed income housing! Let’s smash one third of streets and, upon their ruins, build houses… and parks!
We’ll catch bike thieves with “bait bikes!” Cars that plow through crowded crosswalks will be sold for parts! How about a city-wide “safewalk” program? Traffic-calming circles!? Curb-cuts!? Roofed…bus-stops!?
Motor vehicles will have proper mufflers! Ban car alarms and booming subwoofers! Replace helicopter flyovers with nice, quiet zepplins!
And rename streets after people who weren’t rich English landowners.
…organize a fake protest flashmob. When the police show up, they should say they’re not protesting, they’re just impersonating protestors. See if Bloomberg still orders the police to beat up some reporters and Iraq war vets, just out of habit. Of course, then he’d say he’s only impersonating a mayor telling the police to beat up reporters and Iraq war vets. It’s all very meta.
Post-postmodernist, and almost certainly not prosecutable. Suddenly, 2pm Monday afternoon looks a lot more interesting.
raincoaster 