By now, poor old Cookie‘s probably become one of those sad shut-ins who does nothing but rack up the Visa charges ordering from Cookies4uonline.com.
Thanks a lot, bitch.
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Category Archives: advice
more marketing tips for hookers
Part Two of Three: Part One and Part Three. From the Archive.
Friday, September 20, 2002
4) Keep Your Neighbors Happy
It is a people business, as I said, and your neighbors are people, too. If you alienate them, they shut you down; if you make friends you get free espressos from Starbucks!
Years ago, when I was working at the Starbucks on East Hastings, near the Franklin Street Kiddie Stroll, we used to have a hooker as a regular customer. Her pimp used to send her in for drinks for all his girls, a couple of times a day. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the hookers from the civilians, especially post-Britney, but there was no mistaking her.
She was about 25, and 5’10” with baby-chick blonde hair piled on top of her head in a loose, tendrilly bun. Her outfit was always the same: Skintight white vinyl mini with matching bandeau top and bolero, high white boots with massive platforms and heels, sometimes matching gloves or, in the dead of winter, a big, grandma-knitted style scarf that had more square footage than the rest of her outfit combined. Makeup out to there. She was absolutely gorgeous, to boot.
There was no point even trying to help her; every man in the shop dove for the till as soon as she cleared the door. She would flirt with them while they made her order (as slowly as possible) and gave her free espressos while she waited, just as long as she stayed right there.
She was always nice to the rest of us, too, and once, when we complained that the crowd in the store was so noisy they were driving us crazy she said, “Leave it to me,” and paced the length of the store slowly, sashaying for all she was worth. The place went silent. We gave her two free drinks that day. I remember offering to call her a cab once, when the rain had turned to snow, but she said “No, that’s okay, I’m never without a ride or a way to get one.” And she stepped outside, gave one sashay, and we heard the squeal of tires. As good as having a car, and no insurance costs!
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quote o’ the day: Lily Tomlin IS signs of intelligent life
She single-handedly justifies the existence of Hollywood and most of the Western Hemisphere with this quote from the Miami New Times, via Defamer. I defy you not to agree that Lily Tomlin‘s words apply to your situation, right now:
“Adults have fights and go through stuff,” Tomlin said Tuesday. “I know some people are more dignified in the world, that if you transgress against that kind of professionalism, that it’s some kind of great sin, but I don’t see it that way.”
She called the episode “in a way liberating… now it’s all over, and so what, and I don’t have to keep up some great pretention I’m the most dignified, eloquent, elegant, perfect, smart-thinking, kind, generous person. I’m just a plain old human with a whole bunch of flaws.””
And a whole bunch of fans, lady.
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Operation Global Media Domination: Etiquette: sharing the glory
Not that, in our current Photobusted state, there’s much glory to go around, but still.
The sharp-eyed and sharper-brained among you will notice that not long ago I began making my images live links to their source websites (at least for the first occurance; after that it gets harder to keep track). It seems to me that this is the least I can do for the people who make and upload images, and it gives them a bit of the Googlejuice; also, I’ve yet to have a complaint about it.
It all started in this post, which was linked to by ECNPA, a photography association, some of whose forum members became seriously irate that I’d used the images at all. As you can see from the first comment, the photographers in question weren’t nearly so outraged, but it nudged me into thinking about ways to give credit where credit was due: after all, always I do that for text, no exceptions. Why should other art forms be treated differently? And this was the best workaround I could come up with; it shows the image in context and has, at least once, resulted in a commenter leading us to the actual, original source, rather than the bogus blogscraper that I’d gotten it from originally.
So I’d encourage people to post images, and to properly accredit those images with a link. The webmasters will like that as well. The photo agencies currently suing Perez Hilton have publically stated that if they had only been given credit for the photos this wouldn’t have gone to court, and I for one will take them at their word although it must be said that it’s much easier for someone dirt poor to face a lawsuit because the entire realm of monetary awards resides entirely in the theoretical sphere, and everyone knows it. They may or may not be sincere.
Still, picture it:
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recycling at its best: refill ink cartridges with squid ink!
Those pesky ink cartridges! The printer companies know they’ve got you over a barrel with those damn things; you print things, you gotta get new cartridges, ain’t no way around it except to refill the ones you have, and that’s not very eco-friendly either. Now, thanks to the geek boys at Ink! Is! It! you can refill your ink cartridges from an ecofriendly, biodegradable, natural-source, renewable-resource source.
Squid, baby!
How to milk a Squid in one easy lesson:
raincoaster 