Relativity and Seafood: An Update

That's just the steam escaping

If Einstein taught us anything, my friends, it’s that perspective is reality. Now, we’ve looked at the issue of perspective and seafood before on the ol’ raincoaster blog. Lately the meme has spread, yea even unto the highest reaches of Automattic, where Matt has examined the eternal question from the Anuran point of view.

With the passage of time often comes new angles, new viewpoints, new horizons, and raincoaster herself is not exempt from the machinations and wearings of temporal transit. Indeed, from my new vantage point as a parenting blogger, I find myself shunning the simple, yet easy and cheap, cartoons of yesteryear and engaging more authentically with photographs, as they are more accurate, indeed almost narcissistically so, representations of the real world and thus, more relevant to my more introspective, navel-gazey daily life now. No more cheap jokes with line-drawn crustaceans! No, our new standard demands more; it demands typical scenes that could be taken from my very life!

Baby Lobster, and doesn\'t she look pleased?

Service with a Smile

I know, I know, it’s old. But it’s damn funny. If airlines normally ran ads like this they’d never have an empty seat.

Yes. I. Went. There.

Irish Porn: civilization, caught in the act of falling

You know how those Catholic girls can be. From Billy Joel to Alanis Morissette, bards across the ages have chronicled their plunging descent from the convent into the degraded wasteland of sin and vice in which they dwell from puberty onward. Never has this been more obvious than in our Flickred and Facebooked culture.

The proof? Click past the jump to see what happens to a simple, youthful native of Eire once she ripens and the sharpers find her. Bob Guccione has a lot to answer for.

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Buddy, can you spare ten trill?

Total Information Awareness, yo

Well, I have been asked for money for a latte before. And a friend of mine has an email signature, I live for the day schools have all the funding they need and the Pentagon has to have bake sales. So I guess I shouldn’t be surprised at this. Actually, having lived here for so long I shouldn’t really be surprised at anything.

It appears that the US Department of Homeland Security, having exhausted the normal funding routes of bleeding taxpayers and selling the next few generations to China as indentured servants, is muscling in on territory normally occupied by organizations like the Cancer Society, the SPCA, and the Make-A-Wish foundation.

It’s holding “charity” fundraising galas.

Oscar Wilde would’ve been ecstatic at the juxtaposition of life and art at the Brooklyn Museum earlier this evening — and not just because it involved an abundance of luxury goods. As guests arrived for the opening of an exhibit celebrating the art of Takashi Murakami and his collaboration with Marc Jacobs for Louis Vuitton, they were greeted by an outdoor scene more common on Canal Street: logoed merchandise piled on tables or hung on metal pegs, graffiti-covered walls, stalls closed “by court order,” and persistent vendors promising “best quality” and “best price.” The difference? Those piles of LV Multicolore bags were real…

As real as my recognition of Das Unheimliche.

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Milly d’Abbraccio brings a metaphor to life

Politicians, my friends, are asses. Even the nice ones. Italian porn star and Socialist candidate Milly D’Abbraccio, however, is taking literal-mindedness to a new level.

She put her ass on her campaign posters.

You can’t make the joke about “Hillary, Obama and McCain did the same” because I pre-empted you with the first line. No, really. You can’t.

Targeting her male fan base, the veteran of Italy’s adult entertainment industry has plastered images of her derriere all around the Eternal City in a bid to win a seat in Rome’s city hall…

“People don’t want to see these politicians’ faces anymore,” she told Reuters…

“I am the derriere of the Socialist party,” she concluded.

Mind you, if I were “gifted” with a face like Milly‘s got, I might choose to go with a more attractive trademark as well. Warning: Click onward at own risk. NSFW. The closeup is NSFLunch, either. She makes Jenna Jameson look like Mary Ann.

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