Superstar Hits!
From WebstersIsMyBitch:
I’ve been hard on Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon for a few months now because those assholes don’t make sex tapes, don’t cheat, don’t drink to excess in public, and don’t murder people, which makes my job a lot more difficult.
Precisely. This is why people with their shit together can make great actors, but lousy celebrities. THIS is the true Amy Winehouse Principle.
I have a theory that when someone recognizes your work before your face, you’re an artist; when someone recognizes your face before your work, you’re a celebrity. This came to me one day when I passed BB King‘s tour bus and said to my friend “I don’t think I even know what BB King looks like” and I didn’t notice BB King standing right there because, you see, I didn’t know what he looked like.
Sorry, BB. All you had to do was play a note and I’d have genuflected. BB King and Bono are perfect examples of each side of this equation, although they are equally talented.
And now for something completely trivial: a unicorn chaser if you will.
Looks like Britney‘s come to terms with the fact that her post-childbirth figure will never return to the sveltitide of her Oops I Did It Again days. This new version of her comeback hit Gimme More is even more scandalous than the stripper-pole-themed original, as all the dancers in this version are completely naked, save for a tantalizing dusting of powdered sugar.
Wonder how she sneaked THAT past the censors at YouTube!
via UKPopSugar
(I always feel bad when I leave them out of the Ayyyy.com link roundup, because they always link back to us, but there’s only so much I can do with Jordan and Beth Ditto, ya know?)
Is this the greatest infomercial teaser of all time? Yes; yes, it may well be.
His name is takeittothebank and his game is putting the “ass” in “class.”
Have you ever wondered how the other half lives? Wonder no more. It lives like ME. Every morning I eat caviar even though I do not like caviar!!! Would I do this if I were not RICH!?!?! The fillings in my teeth are gold. Are the fillings in your teeth gold!?!? They are not. The caviar I do not want for breakfast I feed to my cat. What does your cat eat!?!? Cat food?!?! I pity your cat. Mine is the world you live in when you are RICH!!! CARS!!! WOMEN!!! STATUES!!! CAVIAR!!! Perhaps you are beginning to understand. If so, I welcome you. HELLO!!! Now let me ask you this: Do you know the pleasure of owning a tie made of genuine SILK!!! I do!!! Now let me ask you this: would I call myself “THE BANK” if I did not have lots of money? I would not. That would be ridiculous!!! But I am not ridiculous. I am RICH!!! I will ask you one last time: DO YOU DOUBT I AM RICH!?!?!
This is like Donald Trump‘s long-lost Desi twin.
From the whoreanus outfit and grooming to the chubby, inert harem, to the amateur porn-worthy direction, not to mention the maniacal, self-deluded laugh, this could well be the greatest, most inspirational infomercial of all time, greater than the great Aleksey Vayner’s Impossible Is Nothing, even if it ISN’T an infomercial. It appears to be a YouTube channel. I wonder why he hasn’t signed on in a year…must be out being rich somewhere, right? Monte Carlo? Goa? Paris? Dubai?
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
: 
Another too-true toon from Married to the Sea. And I just noticed you can order PRINTS! Birthday coming up…
In related news, this sad tale.
For one day – more if you can tolerate – sit in the same place all day.One chair all day.
: : : : : : : : : : :
Dude, that’s what I do for a living: I’m a blogger!
raincoaster 