soap, not dope: Don Bolles jailed over Dr. Bronner’s

Never forget! 

Now I’m worried about the Cybergypsy. He’s been known to take trips to the United States of Amerika, and I happen to know that he’s in possession of a large bottle of this very (apparently-controlled) substance. Like very large. Like, this could be a fucking trafficking charge if he gets busted.

What the hell am I rambling about?

Don Bolles, drummer of the legendary punk band the Germs, was arrested for felony drug possession because he had a bottle of Dr. Bronner’s peppermint soap in his van when he was pulled over for a busted tail light.

Sounds like a late April Fool’s joke; isn’t.

Should be.

Here, for general distribution, is the official press release from Dr. Bronner’s PR:

“Germ” Wrongly Jailed Over Soap

Absurd GHB Drug Charges for Don Bolles, Drummer of the “The Germs”, Stem From a Bottle of Dr. Bronner’s Peppermint Soap Found in Van During Police Stop

an 8 ounce bottle? Not even enough to get a good buzzESCONDIDO, CA – The Bronner family, makers of the popular organic Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soaps are shocked and disturbed by musician Don Bolles’ April 4th arrest for felony drug possession after police alleged an 8oz bottle of peppermint Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soap tested positive for the illicit drug GHB (Gamma Hydroxy Butyrate). The notion that anyone would put GHB in a rinse-off liquid soap product is beyond belief, and the police field test used must have been flawed or tampered with. GHB, which produces euphoria and is an alleged aphrodisiac when ingested, of course has absolutely no effect in a soap product that is rinsed off the hands and body.

Mr. Bolles, drummer of the legendary punk band The Germs http://germsreturn.com/ was arrested following a police traffic stop and spent three and half days in various jailsin Orange County before being released early Easter morning. During a consented search of Mr. Bolles vintage 1968 A-108 van, Newport Beach police found a bottle of peppermint Dr. Bronner’s soap which is made with organic coconut, olive, hemp, peppermint and jojoba oils. Felony drug possession could mean 20 years in prison if convicted. A pretrial hearing is scheduled for Friday, April 13, 2007 at the Harbor Justice Center, 4601 Jamboree Road Newport Beach, CA at 8:30am.

“I’ve used only Dr. Bronner’s soap for 35 years,” says Mr. Bolles. “I use it for everything – bathing, washing my hair, washing my clothes – it goes everywhere I go. I’m scheduled to go to Europe to tour with The Germs this summer, but these felony charges could keep me from traveling out of the country. This whole thing could be really devastating to a 50 year old guy just trying to make a living. I told the officer ‘its soap, it smells like peppermint soap,’ but he seemed intent on arresting me.”

“It is totally outrageous that the police could be this malicious and idiotic,” says Michael Bronner, Vice-President of Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soaps. “This clearly is a case of profiling by the Newport Beach police of a person who doesn’t look like the people who live in that town. We are paying the cost of Mr. Bolle’s lawyer, and we demand the charges be dropped or proof from the police forensics lab of GHB contamination be immediately provided to us,” said Bronner. Adds brother David Bronner, President: “We cannot imagine anyone putting GHB, or any other drug for that matter, into a rinse-off soap product that is lathered and rinsed off the body immediately. The Newport Beach police should see how much of a buzz putting beer in their shampoo gives them, and get a grip and apologize on their hands and knees to Mr. Bolles.”

At the time of the arrest Mr. Bowles was driving his girlfriend, and fellow musician Cat Scandal to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting in Newport Beach. “I had heard of GHB but the police had to tell me what it was,” said Bolles. “I’m going to fight these charges.”

To arrange an interview with Don Bolles, Michael Bronner or David Bronner please contact Adam Eidinger at 202-744-2671

Omigod, I just remembered: the Cybergypsyleft me a bottle of this soap too! And I had a bath with it just today! Omigodomigod brb d00d, got 2 sterilize th scene, but 1st…hmm, what’s good for barricading patio doors? And hey, is anybody else up for some nachos?

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the Nietzsche Family Circus

In the fine tradition of FC mashups first noted on the raincoaster blog here, we present these brilliant and inspiring quotations from Frederick Nietzsche. By Losanjealous via the Generator Blog.

Nietzsche family circus

All truth is simple… is that not doubly a lie?

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quote o’ the day: Lily Tomlin IS signs of intelligent life

Lily! Fucking! Tomlin!She single-handedly justifies the existence of Hollywood and most of the Western Hemisphere with this quote from the Miami New Times, via Defamer. I defy you not to agree that Lily Tomlin‘s words apply to your situation, right now:

“Adults have fights and go through stuff,” Tomlin said Tuesday. “I know some people are more dignified in the world, that if you transgress against that kind of professionalism, that it’s some kind of great sin, but I don’t see it that way.”

She called the episode “in a way liberating… now it’s all over, and so what, and I don’t have to keep up some great pretention I’m the most dignified, eloquent, elegant, perfect, smart-thinking, kind, generous person. I’m just a plain old human with a whole bunch of flaws.””

And a whole bunch of fans, lady.

Lilyfanz!

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Kevin Mitnick goes to Coventry

Date: Mar 2, 2007 11:36 AM
Subject: Your registration for membership in The WELL
To: mitnick@…

We have decided not to offer you membership in The WELL. Your payment will be refunded, and your application is denied.

The WELL staff

Yep, it is possible to act so heinously that even in the United States of Republicanism, your money’s no good. Stolen from the Wired blog. And what horrible course of action brought Mitnick to the point of being the posterboy for Internet Ostracism?

Just this. Check out the web addy. Indeed, Spring is the season for flamewars…but more on that later…or is that l8er? As for me, I’m dying to know the rest of Mitnick‘s email. Oh, no reason…

ONE reason U2 is the greatest band in the world

Just:

One

Lyrics over the jump. Reason Two is here.

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