from a Parisian bus shelter, via Gawker.
from IvyGate, the States‘ own version of Oxford Gossip, via Gawker.
This is Aleksey Vayner, Lucy Gao‘s soulmate, the perfect Also-Descended-From-Former-Commies-But-So-Way-Over-That, soulless, careerist golem.
Someone please set them up on a date immediately and give them a reality show.
Given a good stylist and continued coverage, they could be the Posh and Becks of Wall Street in no time!
Mr. Vayner identifies himself on his resume as a multi-sport professional athlete, the CEO of two companies, and an investment adviser. The video depicts him lifting a 495-pound weight, serving a tennis ball at 140 miles an hour, and ballroom dancing with a scantily clad female. Finally, Mr. Vayner emerges enrobed in a white karate suit and breaks six bricks in one fell swoop.
Between athletic bits, Mr. Vayner takes the opportunity to opine on success. After being described in the opening lines of the video as “a model of personal success and development to everybody,” Mr. Vayner says, “Failure cannot be considered an option.” He adds: “To achieve success you must first conceive it and believe in it. Remember: impossible is nothing.”
It is also, according to Mark Duffy, the tagline for Adidas. According to IvyGate, Vayner‘s plaguarized a book on the Holocaust, invented a charity, and has listed himself as CEO of an investment company which appears to exist only in his imagination. What a charmer; Donald Trump should be looking over his shoulder!
But that’s only the tip of a huge and hilarious iceberg. Turns out Aleksey is somewhat infamous among Yalies as the “Crazy Prefrosh” profiled in 2002 by Yale‘s Rumpus tabloid. If you thought Vayner’s credibility was shaky after seeing the video, wait til you read the profile. It is devastating.
For starters, his name back then was Aleksey
Garber. He claimed to have spent much of his childhood in a Tibetan monestary in post-Soviet Uzbekistan before moving to the United States, where he was employed by both the Mafia and the CIA. He was also a tennis instructor whose students include Harrison Ford and Sarah Michelle Gellar. And oh yeah: he met the Dalai Lama along the way and is the second greatest martial arts fighter in the world.
Let us now take a good, long look at how the second greatest martial arts fighter in the world and no doubt future father of Lucy Gao‘s squealing brood, wants the world to remember him:
and here I am again!
Thankfully, it appears that none of you particularly missed me. Hits took a slight dip on Friday, as they always do, but you came back like swallows to Capistrano or, more likely, alcoholics to the saloon, on Sunday. For this I can thank Mark Foley, Mark Foley, Mark Foley, Mark Foley, Mark Foley, the trailer for 300, Ohio Northern University, the FW 109, Colin McEnroe’s Blogging On class at Trinity College in Hartford, CT, Technorati‘s front page (finally broke the top 30,000!), and Steve Irwin, who is still dead at 44.
Note, if you will, that my post about Foley‘s IM transcripts, which quotes from and links to ABC‘s complete transcript, actually outranks the ABC post it refers to in searches on ABC.com.
I don’t know what WordPress is drinking, but I’ll have one!
and with the transcript again, from Crooks and Liars.
Olbermann:
And lastly tonight, a Special Comment, about — lying. While the leadership in Congress has self-destructed over the revelations of an unmatched, and unrelieved, march through a cesspool… While the leadership inside the White House has self-destructed over the revelations of a book with a glowing red cover…
The President of the United States — unbowed, undeterred, and unconnected to reality — has continued his extraordinary trek through our country rooting out the enemies of freedom: The Democrats.
more at their site.
from Rick Mercer‘s blog, and to which I cannot at the moment add anything (because when you turn the television off these Ontarians‘ ears become incredibly sensitive and they cannot abide typing of any nature whatsoever, not that I’m fucking bitter, of which more later).
When I saw the headline in the newspaper I swear to God I heard angels sing. “Conrad Black wants Canadian Citizenship back”. Cue the trumpets – it just doesn’t get much better than this.
Seeing that headline made me so excited I couldn’t even read the bloody thing. I picked up the paper and brought it home like it was a box of chocolates. I didn’t even glance at the first sentence until everything was perfect. The coffee was brewed, my feet were up the pillow behind my neck was just so. This was a moment to be savoured.
And it was a great moment. As I read that story I don’t think I ever felt more Canadian, because I knew that for the first time in perhaps our nation’s entire history, everyone in Canada was on the same page. Every man woman and child in this nation was united and together. We were gloating as one.
Amen, brother. Amen.
raincoaster 