Yep. I’ll be by to pick up my winnings from all you cowboy-favoring losers out there.
It seems, from a casual surf around YouTube, that they do these kinds of trials all the time.
And the gun always loses.
The ninjas advance to the second round, where they will face this year’s dark horse: Spartans. Place your bets with the tellers now, ladies and gentlemen.
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Don’t even THINK about it. Or you’ll be pwned by this cheezy, early Nineties Arsenio Hall impersonator and his ridonkulous DRM rap.
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We here at the ol’ raincoaster blog have recently and painstakingly conducted a customer satisfaction survey among a representative focus group of our readers. Thanks to the participants’ enthusiastic responses, we are now able to bring you programming tailored to your specific needs.
But we’re not going to. We’re going to talk about Squid.
The redoubtable (whatever that means, but it sounds positive and not at all ambivalent, which you would think it would be, if you scanned it too closely) Envelope Filter has come up with something better than a quiz; something better than a random, computer-generated Delphic Oracle, forever providing inappropriate answers to simple questions such as “what is my totem Japanese emoticon?” or “what kind of fairy princess am I, you fucktard?”
announcing:
The Tentacle Pornstar Name Challenge
If you were starring in a tentacle porn flick, what would your name be?
This is far too hilarious to not have a go at!
It has occurred to me that the possibility of crossing Lovecraft references with Porn with Japanese with The Internet might create some kind of geek singularity from which there is no escape, or create a black hole, or worse yet some kind of meme, but those are risks I’m willing to take.
Seriously – I need the entertainment that much this week. Don’t let me down people!
Responses to the comments! Winner gets pimped by an insignificant blog! How can you resist!?!
And in case you were wondering? My entry: Tentacool McJiggler!!
In the name of science, do chicks dig gills? I’ve got to mac me a shorty that digs that!
Put your tentacle porn name in the comments on his site; entries here won’t count, as I have not even imaginary prizes to hand out.
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See, North Americans love soccer too! We just play it differently.
The funniest thing about this video is the way the moose gets so pissed off when the ball gets caught in a shrub. You just know that as he stomped away he was cursing that shrub and muttering moorosely.
via Defamer, the Hollywood Gossip site. And no, I don’t know why they went with this when they could have posted Helen Mirren reading lines from Borat, but oh well.
Webjunk, from whence Defamer stole it, has helpfully provided a translation of the anguished dog’s commentary.
“You are ruining my life. Stop it stop it!!! Why? This is all I have. Oh sh*t, dude you are stepping on my tail. Oh – that’s better. Hey Moose, stop. Please, that has my scent on it. Make him stop, I will never leave it outside again. Kill me. Kill me. Why?”
That said, we are huge dog lovers (no, we are not Korean) and we find this hilarious. Is it because the pain is so real?
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You do not need to understand Japanese to love this video I stole from Japanprobe. It’s two anime nerds (otaku) facing down two bullies, Final Fantasy style. The reading of the scroll is particularly moving, I must say, and the stylistic violence is reminiscent of early Peckinpah although the unconventional heros evoke Tony Ching Siu-tung‘s more humorous masterpieces.
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raincoaster 