Bunny Bumpercars Hump Day Unicorn Chaser

I don’t know about you, but I could use one of these right now:

Bunny Bumpercars Unicorn Chaser. There, all better!

Bunny Bumpercars Unicorn Chaser. There, all better!

I cannot stop watching his little hat bounce. It’s always the little guys in hats who can’t drive, isn’t that what Bill Cosby says?

And here: a happy baby goat dancing with its human.

As if that were not enough to distract you from the near-universal meltdown/shakeup/shoot-em-up/wall of liquid death that’s going around lately, we have your daily dose of gossip links after the jump.

The fuck is this? The fuck was that?

The fuck is this? The fuck was that?

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The Julian Assange Action Figure

Julian Assange Action Figure

Julian Assange Action Figure

Fangirl alert: Julian Assange IN AN INDIANA JONES OUTFIT!!!

I’ll wait while you pick yourself up off the floor.

And go wash your hands.

For extra-serious fangirlism, for $60 you can buy just the head and attach it to “your own 12 inch action figurine”. Or whatever you may have handy.

I’d be the filling in a Steve Jobs/Jeff Goldblum sandwich (Lolebrity)

The Lord of the Kingdom of the Undead does not approve of this floozy (Ayyyy)

Roundup of news from Japan (raincoaster)

Matthew McConaughey is turning into a greyhound before our eyes (AgentBedhead)

Joan Jett is better than RedBull (BusyBeeBlogger)

Olivia Wilde thinks she can upgrade from an Italian prince (CelebDirtyLaundry)

She looks like Crispin Glover in an Edith Prickley costume (CelebritySmack)

Lindsay Lohan will stop at nothing (CelebrityVIPLounge)

Charlie Sheen, Celebrity Chef? (DailyStab)

Disney is REALLY scraping the bottom of the barrel (EarSucker)

They may be immortal, but they’re still not taking any chances (FitFabCeleb)

Scary clownceleb faces (GirlsTalkinSmack)

Celebrities care! Or at least fake it plausibly! (HaveUHeard)

The latest in celebrity injustices (HollywoodHiccups)

Tony Dunzo (INeedMyFix)

Justin Timberlake has a new plus one (MathewGuiver)

Martha Stewart is a surrogramma (TheSkinny)

 

 

Yo Bro, check out this No Fro Ho

The No Fro Yo Bro. What a Ho, No?

The No Fro Yo Bro. What a Ho, No?

Whoa.

David Davis possesses only one name, really, and really only half a haircut, since halfway through it he decided to pick up some scissors and stab a passerby in the back. Then, instead of settling down and letting the barber finish, he ran out without so much as tipping. WHAT kind of kids are we raising nowadays?

Well, that’s when the police were tipped off that there was a human before-and-after picture running around the neighborhood, and that they should pick him up.

David Davis, of Cedar Hill Avenue, New Haven, was arrested shortly after the incident when Stamford patrol officers and a police dog found him in a nearby Henry Street apartment. Officers took him into custody when they initially found he was wanted on a warrant for failing to appear in court and later charged him in the stabbing after an investigation, Stamford Police Capt. Richard Conklin said.

We are, of course, far more concerned with the crime against aesthetics than that against the unnamed stabbing victim. But enough of what we think: what do you think?

Portrait of the Artist as a Middle-Aged Celebrity Blogger

And what are YOU looking at?

And what are YOU looking at?

Do you ever feel like this? I always feel like this. Realizations such as this are the circumstances which led to the invention of the expression “FML.”

Gossip linkies over the jump, just because I’m tired of seeing them all on the front page, plus I don’t want Our Overlords of Teh Googlewebz to get angry with me.

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V for Vogueing

Work it, V!

Work it, V!

You know we are in the 21st Century when the anarchists win via photobombing.