from defrostindoors at Bridlepath, who runs the kind of site that doesn’t post undignified stuff like this.
Naturally, we have no such qualms around these parts…these parts right…here…*points*
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Category Archives: Jokes
website o’ the day: lolgays!
Join me, please, in extending a warm, tentacly, raincoaster embrace to lolgay.com, the newest, bestest site on the whole internets. Sure, you can has cheezeburger, but why would you want to when you know those calories go straight to your ass?
Lolcats = Web 2.0
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quiz: at what price would you sell out?
This seems awfully low to me. I mean, if the spiders were under some form of anesthesia it’s quite possible I’d eat them just to see what they taste like; that doesn’t mean I come cheap! Besides, it’d take at least twice this just to pay off my creditors at this point, so no, I wouldn’t sell out for this much.
Also, bonus story: GBS was sitting next to some stuffy, titled woman at a dinner party. He hated dinner parties, but he always went, perhaps so he’d have something to complain about, since he did it most entertainingly. Anyhoo, she was boring him silly so he threw out one of those “liven up a party” questions that the social columnists are always suggesting one do, only because it was Shaw, this was what is conventionally known as “a doozie.”
He asked her if she’d sleep with him for three million pounds. She giggled and said she would, ha, ha, and no doubt congratulated herself in her secret heart for the comeback (providing, of course, she was possessed of such an item: the secret heart, that is: which item is, I understand it, not at all common among such people).
Then he asked if she would sleep with him for ten. She replied, “What do you think I am?”
He responded, of course, “We’ve established that, madam. Now we are negotiating price.”
On Average, You Would Sell Out For |
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At What Price Would You Sell Out?
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Hogwarts hints!
We don’t know who wrote this, but I stole it from Dr. Mike: here are 50 things not to do at Hogwarts. Or rather, here are just the ones I like the very most bestest:
50 Things NOT to do at Hogwarts
1. I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are “covered in bees”.
2. No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.
4. “I’ve heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood’s name” is not a challenge.
5. I am not allowed to attempt to breed a liger.
6. I will not go to class skyclad.
7.The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball. [ed. note: Goddammit! Now I need to line up another date!]
10. Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. “Polishing my wand” in the common room is not.
11. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
14. I will not start every Potions class by asking Professor Snape if today’s project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant.
17. Seamus Finnegan is not “after me Lucky Charms”.
21. It is exceptionally tasteless to tell Professor Lupin that “Once you go Black, you never go back.”
24. I am not to refer to the Potions classroom as “Kitchen Stadium”.
28. I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.
37. There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.
38. I am not a Pinball Wizard.
47. I will not ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.
48. I will not greet Professor McGonagall with “What’s new, pussycat?”
Go read the rest!
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momma’s got a brand new blog!
Alert the media: They’ll be thrilled.
Okay, so maybe it wasn’t a great idea to launch this blog on Friday the 13th.
We shall not let that stop us! Blogroll/ignore at will! We shall be running through rain relentlessly, regardless!
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raincoaster 