Category Archives: media

Bar fight in R’lyeh!

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bar fight in R'lyeh!

bar fight in R'lyeh! art by Frederic Clavere

Normally, Cthulhu and his family are charming hosts, but sometimes Junior gets into the nước mắm and the next thing you know the tentacles are flying! It’s hard enough making small talk when only half the guests are amphibious.

Cthulhu visits the Victorians en route to His voracious victory!

Cthulhu visits the Victorians en route to His voracious victory!

“How about them uppity natives, eh? Oh, I hear ya! I totally feel your pain, dude.”

The guest list included only the highest social stratum. Here’s this year’s hot couple posing happily just moments before the melee broke out.

The Whaleses

The Whaleses

I always thought he could do better, myself. I tried introducing him to some of those delightful Marsh women and their cousin, that Munn woman, but it was a no-go. And why? The girl is clearly talented.

Olivia Munn be desperate

Olivia Munn be desperate

and desperate. But then, many of us remember the last big family party, when she and her cousin Ralsa broke up the dance floor back in ’08.

Click over the jump for a roundup of the other Cthelebrity guests. Get your partying in now, people. Remember, the Crapture is coming!

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Enter the HELLFISH!

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The fare was unbelievably cheap!

The fare was unbelievably cheap!

and now some Cthulian Hollywood gossip links:

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Can YOU take it?

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Can you take it? I sure as hell can't.

Can you take it? I sure as hell can't.

And they won’t even tell you what “IT” is.

My problem is, IT is at home, IT being the task of packing up essentially a three bedroom house’s furniture and stuff and either bunging it into storage or moving it up to Yellowknife in the narrow window when there’s a (long) road up there which isn’t an ice road and besides I don’t even have a driver’s license anymore so How In God’s Name I Am Going To Do This I do not know, but anyway…

How was your week?

In case you’ve heard rumours, well, they’re all true unless you heard them from legendary fabulist Steven Schwartz, in which case they’re probably amazing fabrication and I’d appreciate your noting them in the comments, as one day I may write an encyclopedia of internet drama and cancer-faking mythologists are definitely going to feature prominently therein.

But the rumours about me moving to the land of permafrost and the lynx nuisance at the city dump? Those rumours are true.

Yes, some poor company has offered me gainful employment, almost like a normal person, starting July 1st, which means several things:

  1. this will be a major score for my female friends who want to pick up some clothes free, cuz god knows I ain’t taking anything I can’t fit into or didn’t graduate in
  2. I have a shitload of furniture for sale, at all levels of quality from Oh My God Amazing down to You’ve Got To Be Fucking Kidding Me
  3. I forget what this one is.

Anyhoodle, there will be a party at some point, probably of the bring-a-bottle variety or, knowing my friends, the bring-a-bottle-and-a-sleeping-bag variety. I’ve already handed the reins of the Shebeen Club to Ian Alexander Martin of Atomic Fez publishing reducing my press-release-writing workload considerably.

Before I leave I’ll be speaking at Northern Voice blogging conference and Social Media Camp Victoria, and my newest round of online workshops starts next week. Then, poof! I’ll be out of the Downtown Eastside and up in the land of the polar bear. Where a dinner of (excellent) fish and chips will run you $60.

GAH!

So, before I head off to the wilderness, I’m throwing yet another celebrity link roundup your way. In Vancouver, I could be relatively sure of bumping into one or more of these people every few months. In Yellowknife? Maybe not so much. So, that’s an improvement!

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Canadians: is there anything they CAN’T do?

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Yes, we can fly

Yes, we can fly

Yes, we can fly. And score from there.

Want to know what Americans can do? See the gossip links over the jump.

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Post-Hump Day Julian Assange Fluffer Unicorn Chaser

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Sorry about yesterday: I was travelling and then I was pubbing and then I was sleeping. If I know my audience, you could probably use a dose of cheery-uppy videos and whatnot by this point in the week, so here you go: today’s unicorn chaser roundup

Yes, I bet you didn’t know Public Enemy #1, Information Anarchist and James Bond Villain Julian Assange was a fluffer. But now, we have the evidence:

julian assange is a hardcore fluffer

julian assange is a hardcore fluffer

What? WHAT??? He is TOO straight.

Do click on the image and read the amazing Julian Assange/Harry Potter fanfic. I got no farther than “and he reached into his pants (obviously for his mobile phone)” before losing it completely.

Speaking of gifs of hot men and losing it completely, here is a gif of Prince Harry being adorable with an adorable little kid. Ladies, fasten your ovaries, because they’re going to make a break for it.

Prince Harry is present and accounted for. My ovaries? Not so much.

Prince Harry is present and accounted for. My ovaries? Not so much.

Young Boy: The prince! Where?

Prince Harry: I’m here, it’s me. Sorry to disappoint, but it’s only me

Yeaaaaah. Winning: that’s what it really looks like, Charlie Sheen.

And now for a little dance music: Let’s Dance by Nouvelle Vague, with video from Godard’s Bande à Part. Watching Serge Gainsbourg move, you can see what Fran Lebowitz meant when she said, “People who say they’re really good at dancing mean something entirely different by it.”

And if that hasn’t satiated your appetite for mindless, soothing feel-goodism, here are the celebrity links! Aren’t you excited?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!

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