Category Archives: murder

my blog’s packed with porn (and so is yours)

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Rove Poll DanceYay! We got a pressie!

Isn’t that great? YouTube gave us all a super-special surprise today, with their newest, bestest feature: an automatic scrolling ticker of possibly-related videos running across the bottom of every one of our own YouTube videos, right there in our blogs! How sweet is that, eh?

It’s just too bad that there is absolutely no screening for/against porn or graphic, real-life violence anywhere in this process.

Imagine my feelings upon discovering over on the WordPress.com technical help forum that a few of my friends had been enjoying the delights of superfatty porn (900+ pounds! I had a horse that weighed that) on my very blog while I was innocently watching nothing more exciting than the admittedly-delightful Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre performing their classic version of the Seventies outcast anthem Bohemian Rhapsody.

So YouTube thinks it can porn me and send a surprise
So they think they can pwn me and I’ll not get wise?
Oh baby – can’t pull shit like that, baby
Just gotta get it out – just gotta get it outta here

 

YouTube=BoobTube
Snuff films really matter
Your lawyer can see
This shit really matters – to your p/e.

Fatty ArbuckleYes, snuff videos are also featured in the lineup, although not on that particular video; there are many such easter eggs to find if you troll around a bit. These have even more impact when you find them on a child’s blog or a church, mosque or temple blog. How delighted they must be!

YouTube has thoughtfully added a way to shut off this feature, but alas it doesn’t work in WordPress.com blogs at all, so it seems. And it must be shut off video by video, even those in the archives. UPDATE: WordPress itself has figured out a way to circumvent this en masse, and now the feature works on precisely No WordPress.com blogs. Why they thought this “feature” should be the default rather than the option I do not know; or rather, I do: eyeball grabs. Literal versions of this metaphor are visible in the “related videos” to any number of children’s program clips.

How charming: it’s PeeWee’s Playhouse featuring today’s special guest, Willy Pickton!

Update 2.0: and YouTube caves to global outrage. Kinda

YouTube seems to sense disdain towards the new player and decided not to push users to hard (for the time being). So, rather than showing related videos at the bottom of the player (and the two annoying arrows on the two sides that on-click would seamlessly play the next related video) every time users hover over the video, you will see them only if you click on the ‘menu’ button or when the video finishes. In this case, the original video is zoomed out and also displays embedded code and URL of video.

As for the fatty porn: well, they say any more than an SUV-full is wasted…still, I was completely verklempt at the thought that these alleged respectobiggles were scratching their kink porn itches on the ol’ raincoaster blog, for all the world as if it were a sandstone dildo or sumpin. For shame, YouKnowWhoYouAre! And you over two thousand other video watchers today…

And I thought you loved me for my mind.

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pic o’ the day: there’s always a hangup

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It’s always sumpin.

sudanese maneater snake

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the littlest serial killer

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little suicide bomber

Oh my, his parents must be so very proud!

In the fine tradition of Mary Bell (among too many others) an Indian boy named Amarjeet has been arrested for the apparently-recreational murder of a neighbor’s six-month-old baby. While under arrest, he confessed to two different murders as well: his six-month-old little sister and a cousin.

Is that what they call a dangerous age? Maybe if they make it to two he lets them live.

From NDTV:

”She was sleeping in the school. I took her a little away, and killed her with a stone and buried her,” he said.

The police consider Amarjeet to be mentally deranged and are questioning him about the murders.

”When we met the boy he said that he’d put the girl to sleep in the fields after killing her,” said Shatrughan Kumar, Officer-in-Charge, Begusarai Police station.

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The War Prayer, by Mark Twain

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Mark Twainvia Daily Kos. Twain would not permit this to be published until after his death, and given the potential for blowback I think we can all understand why. It reminds me of nothing so much as William S. Burroughs’ Thanksgiving Prayer. Watch the film on YouTube here.

O Lord our Father, our young patriots, idols of our hearts, go forth to battle — be Thou near them! With them — in spirit — we also go forth from the sweet peace of our beloved firesides to smite the foe.

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it — for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet!

We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.

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work out your road rage here

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smash! crash!

Instead of on innocent rollerbladers such as myself.

Because I will cut you, bitch!

Notorious novelist Chuck Pahowdoyouspellthatianuk has a new book out, but more importantly a new internet timewaster! Click here to play the Rant Game, which is all about causing the biggest possible car crash. My sister should be a natural!