Category Archives: Religion

The 100 Most Influential People in History…and their Religions!

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For the next time you're looking for some way to stir the pot at a boring party. This is from Michael H. Hart's book The 100: A Ranking of the Most Influential Persons in History. No matter what the religion, you can find people the world would have been worse off without. But I didn't know Manicheanism was considered a whole separate religion: seems to me just a quality of most of them. Live and learn. Here's the top twelve:

Rank Name Religious Affiliation Influence
1 Muhammad Islam Prophet of Islam; conqueror of Arabia; Hart recognized that ranking Muhammad first might be controversial, but felt that, from a secular historian's perspective, this was the correct choice because Muhammad is the only man to have been both a founder of a major world religion and a major military/political leader. More
2 Isaac Newton Anglican (rejected Trinitarianism, i.e., Athanasianism; believed in the Arianism of the Primitive Church) physicist; theory of universal gravitation; laws of motion
3 Jesus Christ * Judaism; Christianity founder of Christianity
4 Buddha Hinduism; Buddhism founder of Buddhism
5 Confucius Confucianism founder of Confucianism
6 St. Paul Judaism; Christianity proselytizer of Christianity
7 Ts'ai Lun Chinese traditional religion inventor of paper
8 Johann Gutenberg Catholic developed movable type; printed Bibles
9 Christopher Columbus Catholic explorer; led Europe to Americas
10 Albert Einstein Jewish physicist; relativity; Einsteinian physics
11 Louis Pasteur Catholic scientist; pasteurization
12 Galileo Galilei Catholic astronomer; accurately described heliocentric solar system

 And an interesting table:

Religious Affiliation % in List
Catholic 31%
Anglican/Episcopalian 13%
Jewish 7%
Atheist 6%
Greco-Roman paganism 6%
Chinese traditional religion/Confucianism 5%
Lutheran 5%
Russian Orthodox 4%
pre-Nicene Christianity 3%
Platonism 3%
Islam 2%
Hindu 2%
Buddhist 2%
Presbyterian 2%
Zoroastrian 2%
Manicheanism 2%
Quaker 2%
Unitarian/Universalist 2%
Calvinist 2%
Jain 1%
Jansenist 1%
United Brethren 1%
Congregationalist 1%
Dutch Reformed 1%
Egyptian paganism 1%
Mongolian shamanism 1%
Taoism 1%
Baptist 1%
Sandemanian 1%
Protestant (denomination unknown) 6%
unknown 5%

PSA: 6/6/06 festEVIL

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Some of my readers will realize just why this lies so close to my wee, shrivelled heart. Of course it has its own blog here which is where all blame for the English that follows should be directed. We thank you for your attention to this matter.

FestEVIL banner

F E S T E V I L
transnational noize fest

june 6 2006
6:06:06 o'clock in the pm

around the public library
vancouver bc canada
&
everywhere else

buckets of spoons, tap shoes, pots & pans, drums, horns, crappy drivetrains, trombones, alarm clocks, nagging, cell phone ringtones, operatic manifestos, caterwauling, velcro, tsk-tsks…noize is all these & more. produce it on bikes bodies big things or little things, electric or accoustic or flavoured. screaming is understandable.
to participate in festEVIL, simply emit evil sounds at 6:06:06. since it is a decentralized event, any place in space is a good spot. the mother festEVIL is in a place called oakland.

from your desk, from your tub, from your roof, from your belly. feed the din.

OR, BRING YOUR NOIZY ASS DOWN TO THE LIBRARY

central branch,
homer
& robson
& georgia
& hamilton
streets

& help make the densest, hellest festEVIL north of the 49th parallel. come 5:30ish or earlier or later; however, refrain from commencing noize until precisely 6:06:06.

psh!
at that time you will begin the din***

the 00scillation 00rkestra will audibly materialize out of thin air, as will the PIT. PIT noizicians are stationary. 00rkestra noizicians are mobile, & usually wheeled. bike trailers are encouraged; you may carry your own noize or PIT members if you so desire.

***there is no conductor. therefore we MUST sychronize our watches.
***the concert will go on for as long as we noizicians hear fitting.
***you should supply your own power source if needed.

pa!
MAKING A BEAST

some orchestras have string sections, wind, rhythm. we have Beast, child of PIT & 00rchestra. if you are PIT & you would like to help make a Beast, find a trailer before 6pm, make evil introductions & perhaps you will be invited to climb in.

ghrlooombh mbh kktkttkshsktt mb mnhnn!

festEVIL beckons musicians noizicians bikers humans & buzzing insects of all types. we must make our own evil to defeat it.

Ten Things I H8 About Commandments

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Via Boingboing. And with Samuel L. Jackson and Sinead O'Conner. And I'm not sure, but I think there's a reference to Lohan in there, right at the very end.

The Shebeen Club: Edgar Allan Poe’s 170th Wedding Anniversary Afterparty notes

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Mentioned at tonight’s Shebeen Club:

re: Gabriel Byrne has the sexiest voice in the known universe

re: Project Runway

re: Homer’s Odyssey

re: Narnia Raps from NYC, LA, CAM

re: Narnia Rap from Ramadi

re: The Shoeblog of the Manolo

re: Go Fug Yourself on Lindsay Lohan and Sharon Stone at the Oscars

re: Edgar Allan Poe’s Wedding and sorry-ass life (note that when you google “Edgar Allan Poe’s Wedding” our announcement is #1! My hit-whoredom is momentarily satisfied)

Beardsley The Black Cat

re: Christopher Walken is So Fucking Cool

and is even more fucking cool as the Archangel Gabriel in The Prophesy

re: Cthulhu sits out an election: the voters’ loss

re: General Zod for President

re: cowbell

Books brought:

As door prizes:

I Shudder at Your Touch gothic horror erotica

I Shudder Again more of that old gothic horror erotica. Same old same old.

Black Thorn, White Rose erotic retellings of fairy tales, although if you’d read the original French ones you wouldn’t need retellings, baby!

As references:

The Castle of Otranto, by Hugh Walpole. the first Gothic Novella (at least the first one not in German). Gets so caught up in the atmospheric effects of the flapping of raven’s wings in the graveyard and the eerie forboding of shadows in the candlelight that nothing actually ever happens. Like a great-looking date that can’t talk, a restaurant where the vibe is perfect and the food awful. Its chief virtue is that it’s just barely over 100 pages.

The House on the Borderland, by William Hope Hodgson, essentially the first supernatural horror novel in English, The Castle of Otranto being religious rather than supernatural in overtone and this divorcing the horror of the beings from their evil…ie they’re creepy, they’re deadly, but they’re not neccessarily from hell. Far better than TCOO anyway, and a quicker read.

The Gormenghast Trilogy by Mervyn Peake. Great books, I’m sure, if I could ever get through them. Like chewing through a glacier made of Turkish Delight. Historically important, great works of art, exquisitely overwraught, and virtually indigestible. A beach read…if you’re headed to Gitmo.

The Loved Dead and Other Revisions (and other works) by HPPoe Caricature Lovecraft. Cthulhu mythos stuff was discussed, EAP envy (which Lovecraft had in spades)…and the fact that this book contains the single most vivid and compelling tale of necrophilia I’ve ever encountered, and that’s saying something. No, I didn’t read it out over dinner.

Damn, forgot to tell my tale of the old boyfriend of mine who heard about how I was such a fan of “Lovecraft books” and asked to borrow them. A week later he returned them, with a puzzled expression. I asked if he hadn’t liked them and he replied: I thought they were gonna be how-to’s.

A Warning to the Curious by MR James. I put forth my theory that ghost stories are definitively English, while Gothic supernatural horror is particularly American…it was not well-received. Fools! again I say Fools! Ia! Shub Ni-ohfugedaboudit.

The Secret History, by Donna Tartt. I state unequivocally that this, combined with A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, are the two novels which define my generation; this is not good news to anyone who’s read both books. I test my theory that I can recite the first line…The snow was melting and Bunny had been dead for several weeks before we came to understand the gravity of our situation. I get about 70% right.

The New Gothic which includes such authors as Jeannette Winterston, whom we all agree is a genius. I quote her: Why have we submitted to a society which makes imagination a privilege when to each of us it comes as a birthright? Unfortunately, the book also includes Joyce Carol Oates, who is obviously paid by the word…and we descend into the crude, embittered remarks of literati who are not paid by the word at JCO’s rates.

Poetoon

Music for this evening:

Lou Reed: The Raven, his rock opera based on Poe

Closed on Account of Rabies, articulating a theory that Poe died not of alcoholism but of rabies. The album is produced by the Genius Hal Willner and featuring Christopher Walken, Gabriel Byrne, Marianne Faithfull, Iggy Pop, Deborah Harry, and Diamanda Galas reading Poe’s works

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds: Murder Ballads, which is a collection of songs about murder, either from the point of view of the victim or the point of view of the perpetrator. This plays while we are eating. Bon appetit!

Diamanda Galas: Defixiones/Will and Testament; you either love her or you don’t even recognize it’s music. I, personally, loved the part where she synched up the throbs in her screams with the flashing of the strobes, but that’s just me.

And the menu was: a glass of wine (amontillado was unfortunately not Irish enough for the Shebeen) and The Tell-Tale Artichoke Heart Pasta. Now aren’t you sorry you missed it?

Rock Solid Stories

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Siwash Rocks!Siwash Rock, according to the agency of the Canadian Government that puts up bronze plaques in parks, and as copied down in my Handspring today on a skate:

Siwash Rock

Indian legend tells us that this 50-foot high pinnacle of rock stands as an imperishable monument to 'Siwash the Unselfish,' who was turned into stone by 'Q'uas the Transformer' as a reward for his unselfishness.

Well isn't that special? That's also NOT how I heard the story. This "Siwash the Unselfish" must have one helluva PR, that's all I can say.

The way I heard it was this:

So there's this guy, Siwash. He's a lazy ass. A good-for-nothing. Everybody else is out busting their butts collecting salmon, collecting oolichans, collecting cedar bark, weaving and knitting and pounding and carving and jerkifying sorry, dunno what else to call it as if their lives depended on it, which they do, and Siwash, the lazy ass, just lays around asking them to keep the noise down.

So the other people in the village go to the Chief and they say Look pal, this here Siwash is a drain on our resources. I mean, we're not gonna let him starve, but sheesh Chief, can't you do something? So the Chief goes hmmmm, lemme see and he calls on the Shaman.

And he says Shaman, buddy, we got this Siwash and as soon as he starts the Shaman is like Whoa man, I know all about this Siwash guy, you don't need to tell me. So the Chief's like what do we do with him? and the Shaman goes well I guess you gotta call on the spirits (like a Shaman is gonna tell you to do anything else, right?). So they do.

They call on the spirits. The Spirits are like Yeah, what? and the people go we got this Siwash and as soon as they start the spirits are all like Oh yeah, we know all about him, waddaya want from us? and the people are like, well, we want you to make it so he doesn't bug us with his laziness but we don't gotta feed him and shit. So the Spirits are like okay, let's talk to Siwash and see what he says.

So the Spirits call on Siwash and he's all like Man, I was just gonna call you and they're like whatever Siwash, we gotta talk to you. And he's like yeah, what? so they tell him the people of the village are tired of looking after your lazy ass. You don't help with the fishing, you don't help with the work around the longhouse, you don't do art, you aren't pretty to look at, nothin'! So they want to stop feeding you but they're all like we don't wanna kill him.

And Siwash goes um, well I guess that's good… but you can tell he's not having the best day right now, and the Spirits say Awww, Siwash, dude, what would you like most in the world? If we could grant you a wish – and he's like you're the Spirits, man, YOU CAN! -and they're all like stay on topic for a minute, okay pal? and he's got, like, no choice, so he does.

Well, he says after a long long time of thinking, for he is indeed not a dude to be rushed, and he knows damn well these are immortals who have time to burn, well he says, I suppose I'd like to skip this migration stuff and just stay in one place all the time, and not be bothered by the change of seasons or any of that, not have to work, not even have to feed or dress myself, and if the villagers would get off my case and not think of me as a burden then yeah, that would be paradise!

And the spirits go Okay, you're a rock.