a cookie even Cookie Monster couldn’t love

a cookie even Cookie couldn't loveYou think I’m kidding? First off, it’s Japanese, which is the 21st Century’s version of Dali-esque. The entire nation seems populated by navy suit-clad, sex toy obssessed, seafood-fetishizing lunatics. Seriously, if there are sane Japanese people out there, I ain’t heard about it.

Secondly, they are made from giant, invading jellyfish.

Thirdly, they taste like it.

From Pink Tentacle:

yummylicious!As part of an ongoing battle against invading swarms of giant jellyfish in local waters, some residents of Fukui prefecture have developed a method for converting the jellyfish into powder, which is used to make souvenir cookies. The jellyfish treats, called “Ekura-chan saku-saku cookies,” are now on sale at JR Fukui station at a price of 580 yen for a box of 10…

The result is a cookie with a superbly textured sweetness nicely complemented by the bitter, salty flavor of jellyfish.

Simply charming. Not even in the name of research will I go near these godforsaken morsels of hellfire, not least because I know what they’re made from.

Mmmm, doesn't that look good?

stay gold, Brian Atene, stay gold

Or at least gold-plated.

Here’s the real Brian Atene. He’s alive. He’s not fat. He’s still Over-the-Top and if you liked his cheesy bits here’s more of them. Atene Beat fans are logging onto christopherreeve.org and scooping-up those groovey Superman dogtags. Show support. Go forward! Get tagged and enjoy the unlikely life and madness of Brian Atene.

From the ashes of a now-legendary audition tape flameout rises the real 43-year-old Brian Atene, as overacty as ever and more than willing to make a fool of himself on YouTube if it coaxes the public into following his nerdy Master Plan and making the world a better place by buying dog tags from ChristopherReeve.org.

also stolen from Defamer. What can I say, Gawker sux since they hired the twin Hermiones!

the king of pop and lord of the abyss

the king of pop and lord of the abyss

From Defamer comes pictoral evidence that Michael Jackson, the so-called King of Pop, is well on the way to Transition in the classic Innsmouthian mode, if not actually Arkhamian.

Eagle-eyed commenter Valet of the Dolls was the first to suggest the uncanny resemblance to legended and unspeakable aquatic hybrids. I think the connection is more sinister still.

It is the Thing on the Doorstep.

There are black zones of shadow close to our daily paths, and now and then some evil soul breaks a passage through. When that happens, the man who knows must strike before reckoning the consequences…The butler, tougher-fibred than I, did not faint at what met him in the hall in the morning. Instead, he telephoned the police. When they came I had been taken upstairs to bed, but the – other mass – lay where it had collapsed in the night. The men put handkerchiefs to their noses.

What they finally found inside Edward’s oddly-assorted clothes was mostly liquescent horror. There were bones, to – and a crushed-in skull.

Well yes, but he paid for that. And the nose is his own; he still has the receipt!

save the endangered tree octopus

Cascadia Evening Post, totally straight up and honest. Sriusly.

From my earliest childhood to my brief spell as a humble Greenpeace canvasser, I have always been acutely sensitive to the plight of endangered species, and never moreso than now that I live in one of the last great rainforests of the world.

As we hurtle ever faster towards our inevitable sterile, Logan’s Run inspired future, we shed species at a rate of approximately one every 20 minutes. Please don’t let the untamed beauty that is the Pacific Tree Octopus be lost; do not let it go the way of the dodo and the snow leopard.

But together we can work to maintain the wild herds of this noble creature. Hunted nearly to extinction for its incomparable beauty, its fate need not be sealed; indeed, it is possible that, with adequate planning and habitat preservation, we could learn to coexist with this most iconic of Cascadian cephalofauna.

Save the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus has the full story.

Tree Octopus RibbonShow people that you support the cause of the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus by placing a Tentacle Ribbon or badge, along with a link to this page, on your website or weblog so that they can learn more. Together, we have the power to build a grass-roots campaign to save the Tree Octopus!

Why It’s Endangered

Although the tree octopus is not officially listed on the Endangered Species List, we feel that it should be added since its numbers are at a critically low level for its breeding needs. The reasons for this dire situation include: decimation of habitat by logging and suburban encroachment; building of roads that cut off access to the water which it needs for spawning; predation by foreign species such as house cats; and booming populations of its natural predators, including the bald eagle and sasquatch. What few that make it to the Canal are further hampered in their reproduction by the growing problem of pollution from farming and residential run-off. Unless immediate action is taken to protect this species and its habitat, the Pacific Northwest tree octopus will be but a memory.

The possibility of Pacific Northwest tree octopus extinction is not an unwarranted fear. Other tree octopus species — including the Douglas octopus and the red-ringed madrona sucker — were once abundant throughout the Cascadia region, but have since gone extinct because of threats similar to those faced by paxarbolis, as well as overharvesting by the now-illegal tree octopus trade.

The history of the tree octopus trade is a sad one. Their voracious appetite for bird plumes having exhausted all the worthy species of that family, the fashionistas moved on to cephalopodic accoutrements during the early 20th Century. Tree octopuses became prized by the fashion industry as ornamental decorations for hats, leading greedy trappers to wipe out whole populations to feed the vanity of the fashionable rich. While fortunately this practice has been outlawed, its effects still reverberate today as these millinery deprivations brought tree octopus numbers below the critical point where even minor environmental change could cause disaster.

do ya wanna get lucky? Here’s how!

Lucky Strike...or not?It’s big news in England that a bunch of amateur math nerds recently won the lottery. They’re pleased, of course, and rather proud of themselves for being so smart as to figure out an algorithm that turns out to be worth quite a lot, although that is, of course, in some dispute from math professionals and fearful lottery officials. It appears that you have to play the system a long time before you’re likely to hit a payout, if you get one at all and the result wasn’t, as most people imagine it to be, pure luck in the first place.

Here in Canada we prefer sure things to probable things, so we’ve developed a fool-proof system. Be related to the guy checking the tickets.

Lottery ‘insiders’ win big bucks
Odds of Ontario results are astronomical, investigation by CBC program reports
SHANNON KARI

More than two hundred lottery “insiders” have won prizes of $50,000 or more in Ontario since 1999, and more than two-thirds of these wins may have involved the deception of a customer who bought the ticket.

The allegation is made by the CBC program the fifth estate, after an investigation into the number of “insider wins” in the province in the past seven years.

A statistical analysis of the number of insider wins concluded that fewer than 60 insiders, such as ticket retailers or clerks, should have won major prizes during the period that was investigated.

The odds that the 214 insiders who claimed major prizes — $50,000 or more — since 1999 won as a result of pure luck, is one in a trillion, trillion, trillion, trillion, said University of Toronto professor Jeffrey Rosenthal, who conducted the analysis.

Now THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is what I call a system.

Lucky you, MAYBE