Emo vs Emo: animal wars

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This post will not include cats. Everyone knows cats aren’t emo.

Icelandic Ponies are emo. You would be too, if an outbreak of horse herpes had sent a flock of Utah Beauty Queens off their regular mounts and onto you. You would also, presumably, be rather tired, if very relaxed.

Emo pony doesn't care about your sugar. Life IS lumps, sweetie.

Emo pony doesn't care about your sugar. Life IS lumps, sweetie.

Look, they’ve even got the hair:

Sable Island Pony is emo, too. With better hair

Sable Island Pony is emo, too. With better hair

And Poodles, also are emo. Chihuahuas are not emo: they’re just evil.

Emo Poodle is Self Actualized

Emo Poodle is Self Actualized

It is potentially possible that things that start with a P are all emo. Of course, starting off with a Pee always makes me less moody and irritable…

Operation Global Media Domination: the Craigslist Situation

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CthiCthuaCthua

CthiCthuaCthua KNEEL DOWN AND WORSHIP, BITCHES!!

I’d like to take this opportunity to thank the person who posted a link to my blog on Craigslist (and probably got the idea from Crasstalk, incidentally) thus resulting in a whole lotta Los Angeleses (Los Angelesians? Los Angelesii?) gaining exposure to raincoasterism, whether or not they’re ready for it.

And we can only pray for their very sanity.

SUPER SUPER CUTE CHIHUAHUA PUPPY FREE TO CHIHUAHUA LOVER (SF VALLEY)

Date: 2011-05-25, 10:46PM PDT
Reply to: MWEYAW@GMAIL.COM [Errors when replying to ads?]

https://raincoaster.com/2008/09/15/why-i-hate-chihuahuas/

I DON’T WHY PEOPLE KEEP BREEDING THIS SUPER BEAUTIFUL CHIHUAHUA DOG.

PEOPLE WANT THIS DOG SO MUCH AND ANIMAL SHELTERS ARE FULL OF THIS BEAUTIFUL CHIHUAHUA.

ALSO, ON CRAIGSLIST, THERE ARE MILLIONS OF CHIHUAHUA ADS BECAUSE PEOPLE WANT THIS DOG SO MUCH.

LMFAO

Whoever it was, I like his/her style.

UPDATE: Some Chihuahua-addled Woody Allen character has flagged the Craigslist post as abuse, and it’s been taken down. As you may be aware, we are ALL ABOUT THE CHIHUAHUA ABUSE around the ol’ raincoaster blog, and we suggest that people who get offended on behalf of fanged, trembly naked mole rat ALIENS that CAN’T even READ, PEOPLE need to eat more roughage.

Bunneh Power!

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Fuck You I Can Fly

Fuck You I Can Fly

So, yesterday I must have looked particularly Playboyesque than normal, because I got hit on copiously and actually asked out three times. So that was good.

Not so good was getting Social Media Stood-Up today. I called him, as agreed, at five, only to have to remind him who I was, to his apparent consternation. “Oh, RIGHT, sure, yeah.” He said he’d Skype me back in a few, after he’d called the others coming to dinner and worked out a place and time…and one hour later, I was still waiting to hear back.

And five minutes after that I was on the bus to a friend’s house for delicious, home-made Mexican food, of which I’ve just fixed myself a second helping.

The ironic part of the equation is that the guy is in Risk Management, but if he were any good at it, would he have DARED to do this?

I think not. I think not, indeed.

Maslow's Hierarchy of Internet Needs

Maslow's Hierarchy of Internet Needs

But it’s okay. I’ve still got my poetry.

Good God Celebrity Links!

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Artefact by Dariusz Zawadzki

Artefact by Dariusz Zawadzki

I had one of these things. I needed it to hook up the 1990 era tv to the DVD player and the Blu Ray. On alternate nights it could pick up CBC Mars.

If you want to see what other crazy shit an unjust and potentially insane god has cooked up for you, click over the jump and see what our professional meatpuppetry is up to today. In other words, celebrity gossip links.

Continue reading →

Hump Day Unicorn Chaser: Julian Assange and Private Carleton, FIRST CLASS edition

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I don’t know about you (at all. I mean, you could be anyone out there, doing anything, and if you’re the guy who first posted the comment “I can’t fap to this” on a YouTube video, I want to take you out for a drink. But where was I?). I only know about me. Normally, this is enough for me. I’m self-centred. All my personalities are.

But if you were me, you’d be thinking this would make a mighty fine unicorn chaser on a Wednesday hump day.

Julian Assange may still be a little screwy

Julian Assange may still be a little screwy

Because why not? It’s always good to meet a man with his head screwed on right.

And if you’re allergic to Assange, as many of my friends are, then here’s a jaunty US soldier dancing like Carleton from Fresh Prince on top of an armored personnel carrier or tank or some big, macho-type people mover thingy while rockets fly behind him. Like a boss!

Dancing like Carlton from Fresh Prince of Bel Air on top of a M1068 in full gear, while MLRS rockets fly behind me.

Song “Its not unusual” By Tom Jones

Not in Basic Training, No I wont get in trouble for this.

All that AND Tom Jones? I’m in love.