reposted from TeenyManolo, because I’m lazy
Attention, stage parents everywhere! Your sprog has yet another chance to make up for your own inadequacies by prancing in front of uncaring ad executives for an opportunity to enter the glamorous world of professional entertainment:
The Potty Dance
Details on the soul-crushing, future-adolescence-blighting contest here. Via MomFuse.
Beaver is, of course, the national animal of Canada, and for good reason: who doesn’t like a friendly beaver? Why, there’s nothing so welcoming to travel-weary tourists as the sight of a naked beaver straddling the dotted line in the middle of the highway, greeting the newcomers with what passes for wild abandon here in Canuckistan.
You’ve heard, perhaps, of the Canadian who asked the US border guard to say “Please?” He got pepper sprayed.
And a few years ago there was a lineup at an ATM in Montreal. A Canadian got to the front of the line, got his money from the machine, said “Thank you,” to the machine…
And the American in line behind him beat him up.
This works for me. In fact, I think I’ll go out and get myself some of this for breakfast. By the time the Ovaltine opens I’ll have been up for four hours and done three blog posts. I’ll have earned it!
You Are Mac and Cheese |
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And nothing is more nourishing than a big warm plate of carbs. Taking risks takes a toll on you, and you prefer your comfort food to be old fashioned. You’re the type of person who could eat the same meal every night, especially when life is hard. |
Truly has the great prophet of old, Tom Lehrer, said that the reason most folk songs are so atrocious is that they were written by the people. Yet, verily, we have found one which transcends the acoustic mire to stand proudly alone, foremost or perhaps in this case hindmost among them all. Please join me in giving a warm welcome to Jonathan Coulton, performing his acoustic version of Baby Got Back:
via Newscoma
Cross–posted from the Shebeen Club
Who: The Federation of BC Writers and the Shebeen Club
What: a wicked good fundraiser for the Fed
When: Monday, March 16th, 6-9pm
Where: The Vancouver Police Museum, 240 East Cordova Street, Vancouver
Why: it would be criminal to miss this party!
Wanted: YOU!
Come help the Fed celebrate 32 years of getting away with murder. Whether infiltrating schools, divvying up swag, or distributing subversive publications, the Federation of BC Writers has been operating unchecked in our province for decades.
Do you enjoy the vicarious thrill of rubbing shoulder pads with the Lost Literati of the Wild West, surrounded by instruments of murder and mayhem in the cosy confines of the police museum? Do you have what it takes to make your bones as a Fed member? There’s only one way to find out! Come out to the party and make us an offer we can’t refuse.
Admission: $20 minimum donation includes a drink and appetizers. Click here to register. If you won’t be attending, but would like to support the Fed, you can click the Paypal button in the sidebar to make an online donation in the amount of your choice.
Dress code: Trenchcoat and fedora, deerstalker and cape, jailhouse stripes, uniforms, Bond Villain suits or femme fatale slinkwear all optional but encouraged. Attitude absolutely mandatory.
This arresting experience will feature Western Canada’s first Poetry Brothel (five bucks buys a love poem read to you by a sexy stunner) as well as a Guys and Dolls date auction, so bring your chequebook! Our lineup of lads and lovelies will show the winning bidders the times of their lives, thanks to generous sponsorship from premier local entertainments.
Raffle prize donations, bribes, and sponsorship applications very welcome: please email lorraine.murphy at Gmail dot com. Anything related to crime or the theme of noir is particularly welcome, eg detective books, Martini glasses, etc, or anything black or white.
The Crime Pays fundraiser will be our Shebeen Club meeting for the month of March, so I hope to see everyone there, dressed fabulously and behaving infamously!
raincoaster 