Monthly Archives: August 2006

Heather has two mommy-caverns

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Surf Safe!Well, it might not be Heather herself; it might not even be any Heather per se.

But this woman had better get a discount on tampons.

There have to be some consolations for going through life with two hoo-haws.

I lost my virginity twice. The first time was when I was eighteen. Then I lost the other side two weeks later. To the same guy. Flowertwat...there's a use for them.

You’d think I could have saved one of them for marriage.

From Esquire, (via Gawker) who really know how to give men what they want. So much for those gay rumours!

Ladyflower

the Calamari Wrestler

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A more or less po-faced remake of Rocky, with the Giant Squid in the role formerly played by Sylvester Stallone. Who can tell them apart, eh?

Can I get a transcript? Any bilingual Japanese Squid fanciers out there?

This wild comedy pokes fun at the world of pro-wrestling by placing its accomplished wrestler protagonist Koji Taguchi against a giant squid known as the Calamari Wrestler. The Calimari Wrestler not only proves to be Koji‘s most difficult opponent yet, but also has an effect on several people’s personal lives when he becomes the unlikely object of a young girl’s affection. A quirky plot, kitsch costumes, and a bizarre romance make director Minoru Kawasaki‘s (ULTRAMAN TIGA) effort an interesting and entertaining watch.

where does oil come from?

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Who better to ask than the famous DrySquid Cowboy? An Elvis-talkin’, cephalopodian, ten-gallon-hatted cartoon figure is, frankly, no less authoritative on the Middle East than anyone else who seems to get on the news lately.

Hand shadows 101

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via both BoingBoing and Fark. Some of these are pretty spiffy. I’m relatively sure I used to have these in a booklet; probably a Girl Guide camping manual of some kind, cuz gawd knows I had all that shit. raincoaster was all about the Girl Guiding, until she got into horses.

Is that Peter Cook?

letter o’ the day: Guido’s new jobhunting technique

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Labour...blogging...and of course, no pay. I thought these socialists looked after their people?Hmmm, we’ll see if this works. I actually managed to get fired by someone I had serious blackmail material on…but of course, I shoulda had it on my computer, and not hers. D’oh! I shall be watching this with much interest. Of course, if it actually paid, I’d be applying myself, but I’m done with these “great exposure” jobs. If I want to expose myself, I doubt not that I could find an audience. Which brings us full circle; after all, I still think Tony Blair’s a sexy bitch.

There was Guido thinking that Recess Monkey was the official Labour party blogger, apparently not, since the Labour party is running a competition to find the official blogger for their conference. First prize is free access to the conference. That is a prize? What does the loser get?

“You’ll be given access to all the key speeches and events at Conference and you’ll be blogging from the floor about your experiences.” Guido might even get to meet Prezza!

To enter, all you need to do is email blogatconferenceatnewdotlabourdotorgdotuk detailing your:
* name* address* phone number* blog URL
* and 100 words on why you should be our Conference blogger.

We will pick the best, the most innovative and the freshest entry before announcing the winner on Friday 8 September. So good luck and send us a blog!

To: Guido sez hiblogatconferenceatnewdotlabourdotorgdotuk
From : guidodotfawkesatorder-orderdotcom

Dear Labour Blog Competition,

I would like to be the official Labour party blogger for a laugh.

If you don‘t pick me I will publish a picture of a government minister breaking the law this weekend. Your call.

 Regards,

Guido