Monthly Archives: August 2006

Operation Global Media Domination: Blogworth

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We’re all familiar with the term “blogworthy” by now. Wil Wheaton has a t-shirt that says “I’m blogging this” but really, for most of us it goes without saying.

It goes without saying that most of what we experience actually isn’t. Blogworthy, that is. Which is sad, when you come to think of it. Ever read a LiveJournal? With rare exceptions (called “aberrant” statistically speaking) LiveJournal is where things that are not blogworthy go to get, after a fashion, blogged.

eg:

Had to take the kitty to the vet today. Not the big one, the little one. The vet was nice. I can’t stand vet’s offices, they smell so bad LOL!!!1 Mike won’t tell me what he’s planning for our anniversary, but I’m so tired of Tahoe. Why can’t he see that I want to do a yoga retreat in the Northwest Territories. He knows I’d vote Democrat, if he’d ever drive me to the polls, but he always says next time, LOL!!!1 He’s so cute, God is good to me. I’m going to post pix of my latest scrapbooking project l8r!

etc. Ad nauseum.

Anyway.

While there is no objective test for what is, or is not, blogworthy (getting Farked, Boinged, or Gawked aside), there is now a (glitchy, somewhat arbitrary) test for what your blog is worth, thanks to Pingoat.

Now, I really don’t know how this works, on a deep-down level. But it must be admitted that I do not actually care, either. Basically what it does is take your Technorati rank and equate it with a dollar figure. Whether a big blog sale or book deal affects the size of each individual “Technorati Unit” I do not know, although it certainly should, as should a market correction, ie the bottom dropping out of the blog market.

It’s not an estimate of the blog’s value as a whole on the open market; that’s far too subjective, given that the market for blogs is so small. It also doesn’t seem to take into account whether the blog accepts advertising or not. I don’t, some are plastered with ads (and thus make money) but that doesn’t make any difference here.

No, the reason I like this tool is simple: since I inserted the wee button in my sidebar it tells me in an instant whether I’m up or down relative to the blogosphere at large. I don’t have to go to Technorati and sign in. I don’t have to check Google Blog Search for links that don’t show up on Technorati. I don’t have to do anything more than look over on my sidebar, and as I am constitutionally lazy, I like that.

Your Blog’s Value is $237.11!

Inbound links: 199
Technorati rank: 48998

Up 3,000 from yesterday, woohoo!

face of Jesus/Che found on sushi

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Face of ... somebodyorother on a shrimpWell, the guy who sent the pictures in claims it’s Jesus, but Jesus’ General, who knows Jesus and Commies when he sees ’em, says it’s actually a shrimp with a picture of Che Guevera, and no doubt a dastardly plot to pull us away from Jesus and towards the ungodly worship of socialist shellfish.

Judge for thyself. 

SAN JOSE, Calif. — A California man believes he has seen the face of Jesus Christ on a shrimp tail…

The man wrote that he wanted to share with viewers a smile and a sense of hope…

The writer said he believed it was a sign, as he’s currently going through a nasty divorce.

It’s a sign, sweetie, that you need to get out more. And when that advice is coming from me, it’s really serious.

Che, hey hey!

AbFab’s Patsy and Eddie: a brief introduction

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which is a title that just works on so many levels. I remember the first time I saw Patsy; I’d just switched the television on and there was a tall, superannuated model crawling across some woman’s bed saying, “darling, do you have any knickers? I’ve left mine somewhere.”

I think it was a traffic island she’d left them at, but I can’t remember any better than she can.

Anyway, for those of you who are straight men or hermits, who took the test and still don’t know how to interpret the results, here is a brief introduction to Absolutely Fabulous. Patsy’s the slutty ex-transexual Bond Girl, Eddie is the short, Buddhist limousine liberal PR. You may have heard about the show as the last thing Roseanne Barr ruined with her poison touch, just before losing her career and finding Kabbalah.

TWAT: operation enormous burrito

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Burrito of Terror! 

From AP, via Fark. TWAT continues to protect our airports from swarthy, t-shirt wearing Americans, and our schools from Irish-American eighth graders carrying oversized lunch foods.

CLOVIS, N.M. – A call about a possible weapon at a middle school prompted police to put armed officers on rooftops, close nearby streets and lock down the school…

The drama ended two hours later when the suspicious item was identified as a 30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapeños…

After the lockdown was lifted but before the burrito was identified as the culprit, parents pulled 75 students out of school, Russell said…

“The kid was sitting there as I’m describing this (report of a student with a suspicious package) and he’s thinking, ‘Oh, my gosh, they’re talking about my burrito.‘”

In eighth grade, that’s all anybody can talk about, Mike.

But could it be the revenge of the illegals? Was poor Mike just a simple stooge in a Mexican bomb plot?

No illegals means no burritos, America

OkGo Dance

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My friend Nina says she’d use the treadmill more often if it were like this. I suggest a re-creation class. Anybody got six treadmills? It’s gotten them over 100,000 views on YouTube, so it’s worth the trouble (8 days of rehearsal? Ugh).