weirdness roundup: also-rans

weird al mona lisaHere’s a brief taste of weirdnesses I cruised or missed which didn’t make it into the ol’ raincoaster blog, for one reason or another. If it’s Santa-related or Squid-related, you can assume the reason it didn’t get into the blog has to do with the fact that I copied it to the hard drive at home before the cable went out and haven’t been back to get it. Otherwise, it’s the kinda thing where I looked at it and said Nah, we’ve had too many Darth Vader Sticks Up a Drive Through stories recently, and I just skipped it.

He-Man Sings Four Non-Blondes. The reason I didn’t post this is simply that I figured everyone on Earth had seen it, but I found out today that’s not true. So here it is. Break out the rainbow legwarmers and glow sticks and put on your dancin’ shoes!

An Aussie roundup of world-wide weirdness, all of which escaped the blog except the Brazillian who blowed himself up.

I’d a used this one if I’d seen it in time:

In Cologne, a plastic surgeon cheated out of payment by two women using fake names gave “wanted” pictures of their enlarged breasts to police.

I’ll BET they were wanted!

Rich people getting ripped off on luxury items. You see these from time to time and every time I think: This is news? This is justice, baby!

The best of Dear Prudence. I’ve read it. There IS no best. Dear Prudence, please shut the fuck up.

Predictions, particularly by people who were wrong in the past, and who start their prediction stories by listing instances of them screwing up last year. What hurts most when I read these is realizing he was paid just as much for “I was wrong when I said Britney and K-Fed would have a girl” as “And today the the weird eyeSudan was invaded by Ethiopia…”

Public opinion polls, particularly contradictory ones. If I wanted to know what the common people thought, I’d go to the bloody beer store and I’d ask them.

Praise be to Fark, which is a year-round source of insanity upon which I have come to rely. And some day I’ll even figure out how to register there. Maybe.

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Technorati me!

would you watch Saddam Hussein die?

This got started in the comments section of another post, but it seems to me more than deserving of its own post; it is far more important than Saddam Hussein’s last words. I started to watch the Daniel Pearl video, then I stopped it and did not go on. But I have read all kinds of banned documents, including the manual of Afghani Jihad, and I think I would watch the Steve Irwin video if his family would allow it to be released, so why I draw the line here but not there, I am not really sure I know.

Here’s the debate so far:

Continue reading

happy Christmuhkwanzamadan

Another in our ongoing series of multiculti seasonal anthems. And with all the struggles I’m having trying to do a simple podcast, take what you can get; I nearly posted Kiki and Herb’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart” instead, just because it fits my mood somewhat better at the moment.

But then, Kiki and Herb are the universal language, are they not? (PS if you see Bill Gates or Steve Jobs, tell them to duck if they’re coming through Vancouver. I could strangle those two bytches with my bare hands at this point)

Merry Christmas. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

the jihadi manual of the War On Christmas

via Jesus’ General, who is outraged to find himself nominated for a Weblog Award in the “Best Liberal Blog” category. Outrage! They will soon see the error of their ways and reinstate him in the Conservative category, as befits such a manly heteropublican warrior in the fight against Democrats and all they stand for. Like democracy.

In any case, the blogosphere and Fox news are abuzz over this War On Christmas. Captained by a shadowy cabal of nameless lefties, the War On Christmas seeks to eliminate as non-PC this glorious Christian celebration. Well it seems that the evil jihadi masterminds have decided to capitalize on their notoriety by issuing this book on Lulu.com, thus revealing their nefarious scheme to the entire world. Let’s just take a look then, shall we?

The War On Christmas cover page

The nefarity! The outrageous daring of these secular liberals! Whodathunk Woody Allen, Keith Olbermann et al would be so confrontational? Their shrinks musta put them up to it!

War Against Christmas manifesto

All nefarious lefty plots have a manifesto. It’s the only tradition they’ve ever known.

a sample plot!

Ah, Bob Marley. I knew there would be drugs involved somehow. There always are with these lefties!

Bill O’Reilly, our hopes and dreams rest on your broad shoulders.

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Technorati me!

operation global media domination: victory dance macabre!

total information awareness large

Well that certainly didn’t last long, did it?

Thanks to a nameless Denton staffer who obviously seeks to flout his/her overlord’s will in all things, I have been reinstated as a Gawker commenter after a downtime of approximately…until I checked hotmail.

Next time follow the proper procedures, people.

TO DO: read Dracula.