London Calling

Boris is bonked out by the looks of things

Hello to my funnily-accented friends from various quaint backwaters across the Pond.

I understand that congratulations are in order for the multi-ethnic immigrant underdog Al Kemal, new Grand High Vizier of Londonistan.

Yes, the long shot has triumphed over the Career Bureaucrat, despite a few false starts and a campaign website optimized for and displaying correctly on no browser known to science or religion. We at the ol’ raincoaster blog are vastly relieved to be on the other side of the planet, well away from the anticipated violently uncontrollable celebrations of the cricket louts, the derby-topped swarms of bankers lumbering down sidewalks high on Earl Grey and looking for trouble, and of course the looming presence of his old homies in the Bullingdon Crips, who will now become quite impossible to deal with on a reasonable level. One of the most cosmopolitan cities in the world will be under the ruthless control of a small, formerly marginalized group of cronies whose life experiences fall so far outside the norm as to constitute positive aberration.

The hordes have already destroyed Boris’ website (which has crashed) and so the mob furls their umbrellas and moves on to Boriswatch.

Smashing.

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Milly d’Abbraccio brings a metaphor to life

Politicians, my friends, are asses. Even the nice ones. Italian porn star and Socialist candidate Milly D’Abbraccio, however, is taking literal-mindedness to a new level.

She put her ass on her campaign posters.

You can’t make the joke about “Hillary, Obama and McCain did the same” because I pre-empted you with the first line. No, really. You can’t.

Targeting her male fan base, the veteran of Italy’s adult entertainment industry has plastered images of her derriere all around the Eternal City in a bid to win a seat in Rome’s city hall…

“People don’t want to see these politicians’ faces anymore,” she told Reuters…

“I am the derriere of the Socialist party,” she concluded.

Mind you, if I were “gifted” with a face like Milly‘s got, I might choose to go with a more attractive trademark as well. Warning: Click onward at own risk. NSFW. The closeup is NSFLunch, either. She makes Jenna Jameson look like Mary Ann.

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X-Wing Explosion: the hidden story

Although the government has tried their best to cover up what really happened at the launch of the homemade X-Wing fighter, we here at the ol’ raincoaster blog have sourced exclusive footage which demonstrates conclusively that this was not the innocent accident we’re all supposed to believe it was.

Ask yourself: who gains by this deception? The answer, of course, is obvious.

pic o’ the day: Cthulhu ’08

Cthulhu as Nixon

I think this one nicely sums up everything I’ve always felt so compelling about Great Cthulhu. And I found it via a drunken stagger around a Swedish/Irish blog I found because of Japanese Goth glamour models.

So it all makes total sense.

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when sturgeons attack!

Landsharks in New Jersey. Movie stars mauled by legions of Australian jellyfish. Desert Sharks cruising the Outback. Great leapin’ sturgeon attacks! Who could be behind it all?

Putin Sturgeon

I understand politicans kissing babies; although babies don’t vote, their parents do. One has to wonder, however, if either Putin has now extended suffrage to Deep Ones or Chernobyl was really a helluva lot worse than they told us: can’t wait to get a gander at the proud parents of this one!

Cthulhu ’08, baby!

Cthulhu '08

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