For some things, my friends, there are no words. The soulless perversions, both polymorphous and (shockingly) amorphous, of the cosmic aberration which is Cthulhu know bondage neither in space nor in time, nor in any other dimension either dreamed or measured.
Here, my friends, is proof. Cover your eyes and turn away, rather than click on and be damned.
Here be dragons.
Here be Cthulhu Goatse: Continue reading
Beaver shots have been neglected around here of late (we even skipped the drunk Russian beaver rampage of January, shocking to say!) but we are about to rectify that, ladies and gentlemen. We are about to make up for lost time in the only way we know how: by pandering.
So here is your shot of a smooth, cool, bad beaver, via the equally not-afraid-to-go-there NagOnTheLake:
Yes, the smooth contours of this ceramic Bad Beaver Vase by Paige Russell are evocative and moving in the extreme; why, you could even say they’re patriotic, couldn’t you? Run it up the flagpole and see what salutes.
I just checked all the ones in my freezer and they’re fine. In fact, sauteed with a little vermouth they are wonderful!
Okay, WTF?
And I do not say WTF? lightly. I only break out the WTF? for truly WTF?-worthy occasions.
Such as this one.
WTF?
I blame Australia. Weren’t the Aussies the ones who got Jediism recognized as a religion? Yes, it’s a real religion now. And so Darth Vader is either their Pope or their Anton LaVey, depending on your perspective. So, naturally, from that point ten years ago to this it’s an easy stroll to this photo, which was apparently (my Icelandic is somewhat rusty; Paging Bjork!?!?!?!) snapped at a 100% legit ecumenical networking meeting.
Which is not to imply that there is a samizdat or heretical ecumenical meeting underground, although that would be post-worthy as well, if somewhat of a logical impossibility. But we have certainly never let impossibility or logic stop us, as Metro will be only too happy to attest in the comments.
UPDATE:
Bloody Hell! None of the major online translators have an Icelandic-to-English web page translation service. Why, this is SCANDALOUS! SCANDALOUS, I tell you! I finally found one at InterTran, praise be to Cthulhu!
Blackface{Svarthöfði} riverstalk, laumast að, slope off, laumast burt, infiltrate, stream, {á} vegum félagsmanna intoat, during, for, in, {í} UnbeliefDisbelief, Incredulity, Scepticism, Skepticism, {Vantrú}
OrganisationAssociation, Company, Fellowship, Partnership, Society, {Félagar} intoat, during, for, in, {í} samtökunum UnbeliefDisbelief, Incredulity, Scepticism, Skepticism, {Vantrú} pack of horsesstud, {stóðu} pay lip service to{fyrir} participationinvolvement, {þátttöku} Blackface{Svarthöfða} intoat, during, for, in, {í} walkingambulatory, peripatetic, {göngu} sacerdotalclerical, {presta} whomas, that, which, who, {sem} voru riverstalk, laumast að, slope off, laumast burt, infiltrate, stream, {á} leið riverstalk, laumast að, slope off, laumast burt, infiltrate, stream, {á} clausesentence, simple sentence, typesetting, {setningu} Synod{Prestastefnu} intoat, during, for, in, {í} Cathedral{Dómkirkjunni} yesterday{í gær}.
Snuggle up toAdvanee, Eneourage, Promote, Nuzzle up against, {Að} verbbid, {sögn} Matthíasar Ásgeirssonar, shapeformat, {formanns} UnbeliefDisbelief, Incredulity, Scepticism, Skepticism, {Vantrúar}, var ;fn)þetta þarna, that, this, it, {þetta} onlynone but, but, exclusively, simply, strictly, just, {aðeins} jokingly{í gríni} gert whilebut, only, than, whenas, whereas, {en} themall, þeim mun, {þeim} – finna{fannst} verya great many, a great, widely, all, greatly, highly, immensely, {afar} drolly{spaugilegt} snuggle up toadvanee, eneourage, promote, nuzzle up against, {að} improvecompensate, mend, repair, {bæta} Blackface{Svarthöfða} intoat, during, for, in, {í} hópinn.
Aðspurður sayestsayst, {segir} Matthías goings-on{viðburðinn} beef upbuild up, bolster, boost, favour, fortify, further, hype, intensify, promote, redound, reinforce, {eflaust} notdon’t, never, {ekki} becomegot to, get, grow, occur, take, will, remain, must, need, {verða} yearly{árlegan} whilebut, only, than, whenas, whereas, {en} neverne’er, , nevermore, aldrei framar, {aldrei} sé snuggle up toadvanee, eneourage, promote, nuzzle up against, {að} knowwit, {vita} totalstudy, tot, tot up to, work out at, amount to, {nema} Blackface{Svarthöfði} departeddeceased, defunct, {láti} aft{aftur á} scrape togetherrestrain oneself, hoard, {sér} kræla.
Well, that clears that up!
For those of you who’ve wondered if I ever sleep, of course I do, in the daytime. For those of you who’ve wondered how I’ve managed to survive everything that’s been thrown at me, perhaps this is a clue: I’m immortal.
Today was a lazy day for me, since I pre-posted all my paid blogging stuff for the weekend, so when someone on Gawker asked me about my past as an execution victim, I decided to type it out. Here, for what it’s worth, it is.
I didn’t remember who did it the first time, it was early days; I got executed for being too “me-too” as in, twice in a week Gawker had posted something and I posted a “yes, and there’s this” in the comments, with a link to something related.
It was most enlightening: people who’d been nicey-nicey to me before piled on. Little did they know…
Then I got fished out of the graveyard by a kind intern, came back and posted. Mohney executed me again, citing a rather arbitrary “48-hour rule”.
Then I got fished out of the graveyard again by someone who shall remain nameless.
I got executed at Gawker again for something. Don’t remember what, actually, but probably dropping too many links to my blog.
Not that I would ever do such a thing.
Then Defamer brought commenter executions on and I said it was my goal to be executed by every Gawker site, so they executed me. Then came resurrection again…
Then I posted that getting executed by every site would mean I’d have to actually GO to Kotaku and Gizmodo, so Kotaku and Gizmodo both executed me. Not sure if that counts as once or twice.
Again, I rose on the third day.
I’m relatively sure I got executed on a different Gawker media site as well, but I can’t remember what it was. Ah, well.
If you’ve got ten or fifteen hours to kill, go to that thread and play all the YouTubes: it’s a compilation of the best movie speeches of all time, and it’s over 300 comments now, most of them pretty awesome. Here’s my contribution and for those of you who may be wondering,
YES I AM PMSING!!!!!!
ah, Ken.
Run away with me and we’ll have a hundred little Irish babies who’ll kick Hollywood’s ass.
raincoaster 